PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between bloody penis (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and big guy (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). bloody penis could well score a knockout today. He has the power to get to big guy's chin.

penis
vs
guy

225 cm
21
300 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

225 cm
18
300 lbs
0 - 2 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Good knees
Good chin

BJJ White Belt
Good elbows
Determined

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of New York, bloody penis!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, big guy!
The judges for this bout are Dean Styles, John Roberts and Jorge Garcia.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
penis throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around guy's waist but guy gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing penis off to one side.
penis shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with guy but guy pushes him off and we're back to square one.

penis scores a trip takedown into side control. Nice.
guy is trying to get back to half guard.

penis decides to stand up, so the ref orders guy to his feet.
guy avoids the head kick by penis.
penis tries to clinch there but guy circles away.
penis is looking to clinch.
guy tries to close the distance and clinch but penis swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
penis throws a head kick that lands with a deafening thwack! The crowd roars as guy stumbles backwards and falls to the mat. penis follows into mount!

guy is rocked!

It looks like big guy has been cut.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.

penis stands up from mount. Strange move.
guy is still on wobbly legs! Can penis finish him?
bloody penis seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.

penis scores with a takedown into guy's guard.
penis is breathing heavily.
penis has decided he wants to stand but the closed guard of guy is proving hard to escape from.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
guy seems to have recovered his senses.

That's one minute gone in the round.
guy is trying to stand up but he's not managed so far.
guy looking to sweep here. No luck so far.
guy not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
penis wants to stand and escape but instead guy has hit a sweep and he's now on top in guard.
penis being controlled here, momentarily.
guy slips effortlessly into side control - very nice.
penis is pushing guy's head away, looking to escape. guy manages to hold on to the position though.
penis bucks up and tries to throw guy off but instead guy has got his back!
penis looking very determined here, making life difficult for guy.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
My god... these two guys really need to pick up the pace or everyone will leave to go get a beer.
guy lands a shot to the body.
guy wants to control but penis is keeping busy.
guy loading up with punches from the back mount - how long can penis hold on?
penis controlling the position well but he knows he's in a bad position.
penis trying desperately to get back to his feet here but he's not having any joy at all. He's going to tire himself out if he's not careful.

penis is trying to get back to his feet. He's worked up on to his knees and now he's on his feet with his head on the canvas, trying to shake guy off. It looks like it's working - guy slides off, much to his dismay, and we're back to standing! penis displaying calm under pressure there.
guy moves in looking to clinch but penis pushes him off.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
guy fails with a takedown attempt.
penis closes the distance but guy moves to the side
and guy counters with a flying knee. Nice.
penis tries to clinch up but guy circles away and keeps his distance.
penis throws a quick head kick that skims the top of guy's head.
penis tries to clinch up but guy circles away and keeps his distance.
guy shoots for a takedown but penis saw that one coming a mile off and avoided it easily.

penis closes the distance, clinches up and gets a nice trip takedown into side control. Very smooth.

penis decides to stand up, so the ref orders guy to his feet.

penis drives through with a takedown into guard.
guy is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.
guy working a defensive guard here.

penis stands up from guard. Let's bang!

That's four minutes gone in the round.
penis throws a sloppy head kick and guy moves out of range easily.
guy checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
penis takes a nasty kick to the mid section... That should keep him thinking. Does he try and block and risk a head kick landing?
guy fails with an attempt to clinch.
guy scores with a hook.
penis lands with a slapping head kick.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
penis throws a right and a left that guy avoids nicely.
penis closes the distance but guy moves to the side

and guy counters with a nice single leg takedown and he's in penis's guard now.
guy sneaks a leg through and gets to half guard. That was like a knife through butter how easily he passed penis's guard.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.

penis has one foot on guy's thigh - he pushes off and manages to get back to his feet.
penis with a poor takedown
and guy counters with a slapping leg kick.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for bloody penis. That's going to take a lot out of him.

penis closes the distance and gets a double leg, slamming guy to the mat! guy manages to get full guard.

penis stands up from guard. Let's bang!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

bloody penis dominated that round.
The cut man is working on big guy's cut.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

penis looks for a takedown. He's got it. We're now in half guard.
penis wants to get back to his feet.

guy is working on a guillotine. He's managed to get to full guard and he's really squeezing tight! penis is tapping! Great win for guy!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:18 of round 2, we have a winner by way of Submission (Guillotine). big guy!