PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Eric Cartmen (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ulrich Scherer (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Cartmen's entrance music is Eric Cartman - Come Sail Away . A fine choice. Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!

Cartmen
vs
Scherer

181 cm
24
210 lbs
9 - 7 - 0

192 cm
23
212 lbs
3 - 6 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Great low kicks
Insanely flexible

BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent boxer
Heavy handed

AnonymouS
The Empire Clothing and Laundry

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 9 - 7 - 0, fighting out of New York, Eric Cartmen!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 3 - 6 - 0, fighting out of New York, Ulrich Scherer!
The judges for this bout are Steve Montenegro, John Kavanagh and Joseph Jones.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Cartmen lands with a thumping leg kick.

Scherer scores a trip takedown into side control. Nice.
Scherer sitting in side control, looking to soften his opponent up with elbows and hammerfists but Cartmen is avoiding damage well and looking to escape the position.
Cartmen defending against the ground and pound.
Cartmen wants to control but Scherer postures up.
Cartmen is looking for a sweep.
Cartmen can't do much from the bottom here.
Cartmen gets back to half guard.

Cartmen looking for submissions from an awkward position here.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Cartmen is pressing down on Scherer's left leg trying to get back to full guard. He's managed it.

Cartmen has his foot on Scherer's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Scherer works his way back into a safe position though.
Cartmen might be looking to lock onto one of his opponent's long limbs for a submission, whilst we're on the ground.
Cartmen is working the butterfly guard. He manages to land a nice scissor sweep and is now in half guard on the top. Nice move.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Scherer manages to get to full guard.
Scherer controls Cartmen momentarily but Cartmen frees himself.
Scherer told us pre-fight that he has been working on his escapes in training. Let's see if he can call on some of his new skills to get back to his feet.
Cartmen controlling from the top position.
Scherer not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
Cartmen preventing the sweep.
Cartmen passes Scherer's right leg, so he's now in half guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
My god... these two guys really need to pick up the pace or everyone will leave to go get a beer.
Scherer is trying to stand back up but Cartmen is controlling him

Cartmen is working for a submission of some sort.
Cartmen trying to control the action but Scherer is working from the bottom.
Scherer is pressing down on Cartmen's left leg trying to get back to full guard. He's managed it.
Cartmen trying to control the position from guard on top but Scherer is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.

Scherer manages to wriggle out and sneak his way back up to his feet, so the fighters are now clinched up against the cage.
Cartmen lands a nice elbow.
Cartmen goes for a body shot but it's blocked.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Scherer is trying to push Cartmen away but Cartmen has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Cartmen lands a good knee to the midsection. Scherer won't want to take too many of those.
Cartmen misses with a body punch.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Cartmen obliges.
Cartmen is stalling here.
A right hook to the body lands for Cartmen.
Cartmen lands a damaging elbow.
Scherer tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Cartmen lands a body punch.
Scherer throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Scherer takes an elbow to the temple.
Cartmen avoids the elbow strike from Scherer, against the cage.
Cartmen throws a knee to the head but misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen lands a body shot in the clinch.
A nice left hand lands by Cartmen.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Cartmen lands a damaging elbow.

It looks like Ulrich Scherer has been cut.
Cartmen landing knees to the body.
I was talking to Cartmen's coach per-fight and he was telling me that they'd been working on the clinch in the runup to this fight.
Scherer looks winded!
Cartmen using the Thai clinch to land knees to the body.
Cartmen digs a right hand into Scherer's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Scherer's gas tank.
Cartmen lands a body shot in the clinch.
Cartmen creates a bit of space for himself and sneaks an elbow through Scherer's defenses.
Nice elbow from Cartmen.
A left hand lands to the body for Cartmen.
A nice glancing elbow lands by Cartmen.
Cartmen controlling the action here for a moment.
Cartmen lands with a light punch inside.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Eric Cartmen dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Ulrich Scherer's cut.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!

Scherer moves into the clinch.
Eric Cartmen has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Cartmen is working Scherer over against the cage.
Cartmen fails to pull guard.
Scherer is looking to break free of the clinch but Cartmen has double underhooks.
Scherer wants to stall.
Scherer tries to break the clinch but Cartmen is controlling the position.
Scherer blocks an elbow strike from Cartmen.
Cartmen is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Scherer can do to turn this around?

Cartmen manages to pull guard.

Cartmen is throwing his legs up, looking for submissions. Scherer is aware though and is defending well.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Scherer is looking to work some ground and pound but Cartmen has wrist control.
Cartmen will have to put a bit more behind his punches if he's going to do any damage from this position.
Cartmen is working the butterfly guard. He manages to land a nice scissor sweep and is now in half guard on the top. Nice move.

Scherer is trying to control but Cartmen passes into side control!

That's one minute gone in the round.
Scherer is looking to reverse the position.
Cartmen sitting in side control, looking to soften his opponent up with elbows and hammerfists but Scherer is avoiding damage well and looking to escape the position.
Eric Cartmen overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.

Cartmen thinks about going for a far side armbar but bails out and retains the dominant position instead.
Cartmen works to advance to full mount. Scherer defends for a few seconds but eventually he succumbs.
Cartmen can't quite control the action as he would like just now, as Scherer is looking to escape.
Cartmen looking to ground and pound but Scherer is blocking nicely.

Cartmen goes for an armbar but he's not got it… Scherer turns into him and now he's in Cartmen's guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Scherer throwing strikes but missing.
Cartmen looking to sweep using the butterfly guard but Scherer puts pay to that idea as he passes nicely into half guard.
Cartmen is pressing down on Scherer's left leg trying to get back to full guard. He's managed it.

Cartmen looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Scherer trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Scherer throwing strikes but missing.

Cartmen pushes a forearm under Scherer's chin to create some space. He's escaped his hips and pivoted quickly for an armbar! Can he extend the arm? Yes, Scherer is tapping out! Damn, that was fast!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:57 of round 2, we have a winner by way of Submission (Armbar). Eric Cartmen!
A relieved looking Eric Cartmen thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.