PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Frank Garfunkel (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Gun Slinga (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Garfunkel kept the crowd waiting but all that was forgotten when his ring entrance music started. The incomparable musical genius that is Haifisch. On his way into the cage it seems that Frank Garfunkel has been attacked by a crazed fan! It looks like it might have been the just bleed guy! Luckily Frank Garfunkel seems to be OK! I thought that lunatic was in prison!?

Garfunkel
vs
Slinga

208 cm
33
272 lbs
22 - 7 - 0

194 cm
35
256 lbs
43 - 22 - 0

Great wrestler
Lethal high kicks
Cardio machine

Olympic wrestler
World class MT
Good gas tank

Museum of Monsters & Madmen
Sun-Tzu

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the super heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 22 - 7 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Frank Garfunkel!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 43 - 22 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Gun Slinga!
The judges for this bout are Daniel Franklin, Gwen Towbar and Robert Twigg.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Garfunkel fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Slinga manages to avoid it.
Slinga counters with a body kick.
Slinga has been working on his striking defense in training and it's paying off as Garfunkel is landing a low percentage of strikes.
Garfunkel fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
Garfunkel shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
Garfunkel avoids a kick to the body.
Garfunkel throws a hard body shot but it just misses.

Slinga gets caught flat footed, as Garfunkel shoots in with a quick takedown into guard.
Garfunkel with a flurry of punches that miss.
Garfunkel pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Slinga is keeping the position for now.
Garfunkel stopping the sweep attempt from Slinga.
Garfunkel throws a big right hand that misses.
Garfunkel will need to keep those long limbs tucked in whilst he's on the ground, to prevent any submissions.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Garfunkel landing with the ground and pound.
Garfunkel throws a big elbow that misses.
Slinga utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Garfunkel missing there with some ground and pound from the guard.
Slinga is pulling down on Garfunkel's head to control his posture.
Slinga is continuing to stall.
Garfunkel postures up in Slinga's guard and throws a big left but Slinga blocks it.
Garfunkel being controlled here momentarily.
Garfunkel missing there with some ground and pound from the guard.
Slinga trying to keep a closed guard but Garfunkel is proving a slippery customer.
Garfunkel has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Slinga seems keen to control rather than go for a submission, at least for now.
The referee is asking the fighters to pick up the pace.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are showing their displeasure at the lack of action as loud boos ring out around the arena.
Garfunkel trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Slinga seems keen to control Garfunkel's posture.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Garfunkel lands with an overhand left.

It looks like Gun Slinga has been cut.
Slinga comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Slinga takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Garfunkel moves out of range of the body kick.
Garfunkel stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Slinga.
Garfunkel jabs Slinga right on the nose. Slinga blinks but takes it well.
Garfunkel circles away from the clinch attempt.
Garfunkel throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Garfunkel comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Garfunkel thuds his right hand into Slinga's forehead from close range. That could be painful for both fighters.
Garfunkel throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Garfunkel lands the left hand.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Slinga is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Garfunkel avoids the body shot from Slinga.
It looks like Garfunkel has been trying to sharpen up his punching technique, as it looks crisper than last time we saw him.
Slinga uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Garfunkel.
Garfunkel throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Garfunkel misses with a body shot.
Garfunkel misses with a hook
and Slinga counters with a nice uppercut.

Garfunkel shoots in for a takedown from distance. He catches Slinga napping and manages to drive through into side control!
Garfunkel postures up a little and throws a couple of hammerfists but they don't connect properly.
Slinga tries to buck Garfunkel off but Garfunkel is having none of it.

Garfunkel is trying to land an Americana. He has the arm isolated but Slinga is keeping cool and he's avoided the danger for now.
Slinga is trying to control Garfunkel's posture but Garfunkel avoids it.
Slinga takes an elbow right on the bridge of the nose and winces in pain.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Garfunkel postures up a little and throws a couple of hammerfists but they don't connect properly.
Slinga gets back to half guard.
Garfunkel throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Slinga is trying to maintain the position but Garfunkel is very close to passing his half guard.
Garfunkel is trying to control the action in half guard but Slinga is working away on the bottom, looking perhaps to get back to full guard.
Garfunkel wants to pass to mount but Slinga is defending the position.
Slinga trying to control from the bottom.
Garfunkel throwing shots but Slinga is blocking nicely.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Frank Garfunkel dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Gun Slinga's cut.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action.

Slinga steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Garfunkel.
Slinga thinks about the counter body kick.
Slinga looks to land a body kick but Garfunkel moved away.
Garfunkel avoids the body shot from Slinga.
Slinga swings for the body but Garfunkel moves out of range.
Slinga keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
Garfunkel jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Garfunkel scores with a sloppy right hand. Slinga should have avoided that one.

That has opened up Gun Slinga's cut even more.
A punch combination from Garfunkel misses.
Slinga misses with an uppercut. Garfunkel saw that one coming.
Garfunkel half commits to a counter takedown before pushing away, out of range.
Garfunkel takes one to the chin there.
Garfunkel throws a hook to the side of Slinga's head but Slinga sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Garfunkel throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around Slinga's waist but Slinga gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing Garfunkel off to one side.
Garfunkel is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Slinga can do to turn this around?
Garfunkel is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Slinga.
Garfunkel throws a leg kick which misses Slinga's front leg but catches the back leg as Slinga tries to avoid it.
Slinga throws a sloppy head kick and Garfunkel moves out of range easily.

Slinga takes the fight into the clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Slinga lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Slinga pushes Garfunkel back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
Garfunkel blocks an uppercut.
Garfunkel blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Garfunkel blocks a body shot from Slinga.
A real battle for position is taking place between these two warriors.
Garfunkel working aggressively here.
Garfunkel blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Garfunkel's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Slinga gets through Garfunkel's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Garfunkel tries to throw a body punch but Slinga avoids it by throwing Garfunkel back against the cage.
Slinga scores with a shoulder strike.
Garfunkel is working on a leg, looking for a takedown but Slinga is defending well.
Garfunkel swings wildly with an uppercut but Slinga uses good head movement to avoid it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Slinga scores with a hook to the body.
Slinga lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Garfunkel lands with a right to the head.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
A head punch blocked on the inside by Slinga.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Garfunkel.
Garfunkel blocks an uppercut.
Slinga fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Garfunkel blocks an uppercut.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Slinga.
Garfunkel's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Slinga tries a body shot but Garfunkel blocks it.
Garfunkel prevents a body shot from Slinga.

Garfunkel manages to pull guard. Let's see whether he can land a sub off his back.
Slinga advances position into side control!
Frank Garfunkel overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Garfunkel is looking to reverse the position.
Slinga in side control, just content to control the action for now.
The adventures of Slinga the control monster continue. Boring.
Garfunkel struggling a bit here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight.
Garfunkel is trying to improve his position.
Garfunkel wants to control but Slinga postures up.
Garfunkel is looking to regain half guard here but Slinga keeps moving and retains side control.
Slinga takes a little break here. Garfunkel wants to take advantage but he is being controlled well.
Garfunkel tries to work a leg under to get back to half guard but Slinga wriggles his own leg back out and remains in side control.
Slinga taking a breather here.
Slinga tries to move to mount but Garfunkel blocks the move with his legs.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Gun Slinga showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
The cut man is working on Gun Slinga's cut.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Garfunkel darts in looking for a takedown but Slinga gets double underhooks and turns Garfunkel into the cage.
Garfunkel throws a body punch but Slinga moves out of range.
Slinga follows through with a counter body kick but it doesn't land.
Slinga uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Garfunkel.
Slinga follows through with a counter body kick but it doesn't land.
Garfunkel scores with a punch to the head.
Garfunkel thows a left - swing and a miss!
Garfunkel blocks the body kick.
Slinga connects with a leg kick. Garfunkel looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
Garfunkel throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
A nice combination there by Garfunkel.
Slinga lands a nice looking body shot.
Garfunkel steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Slinga.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Slinga tries to clinch up.
Slinga lands with a right hand.
A looping hook to the body misses from Slinga. Garfunkel does a little dance to reset his feet.
Garfunkel takes a push kick to the midsection and stumbles backwards.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Slinga throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Garfunkel was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Slinga lands with a cross to side of his opponent's head.
Slinga with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
The fighters circling - Slinga throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Slinga is looking to clinch.
Garfunkel lands with an uppercut that bounces Slinga off the cage and back into range.
Slinga pivots as if he's going to throw a leg kick but stops half way.
Garfunkel keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Garfunkel throws a jab when Slinga was well out of range.
Garfunkel is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
Garfunkel swings for the body but Slinga moves out of range.
Gun Slinga is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Slinga jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Slinga tries a head kick but it misses.
Good leg kick by Slinga there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
Slinga steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Garfunkel.
Slinga scores with a push kick.
Garfunkel swats away the attempt to clinch by Slinga.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Slinga takes a swing at Garfunkel's ribcage but misses.
Slinga slips a straight right by Garfunkel.
Slinga pushes forward with a 1-2 combination that forces Garfunkel back to the cage. Slinga follows up with a solid lead hook to the liver.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Garfunkel misses with a looping right.
Garfunkel takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
Garfunkel swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Garfunkel keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
Slinga lunges at Garfunkel with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Garfunkel's hand.
Garfunkel lands an overhand right.
Slinga moves out of range of the leg kick from Garfunkel.
Slinga dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Slinga tries to clinch but Garfunkel is having none of it.
Slinga avoids the body shot from Garfunkel.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Garfunkel throws an off balance right hand
and Slinga finishes the little exchange by landing a big kick to the body.
Slinga connects with a leg kick. Garfunkel looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
A head kick from Slinga lands but Garfunkel takes it in his stride.

It looks like Frank Garfunkel has been cut.
Frank Garfunkel is winning the standup battle so far.
Garfunkel moves out of range of the body kick.
Slinga digs a good hook to Garfunkel's body.
Garfunkel fails with a takedown attempt.
Garfunkel on the wrong end of a nice jab.
Garfunkel swings for the body but Slinga moves out of range.
Slinga lands a slapping body shot.
Nice defenses there by Slinga.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Garfunkel misses with a left hand
and Slinga counters with a stiff right hand.
Garfunkel scores with the left hand. Slinga knows he should have avoided that one.

Slinga closes the distance and clinches.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
A right hook to the body lands for Slinga.
Garfunkel swings wildly with an uppercut but Slinga uses good head movement to avoid it.
Garfunkel looking for a takedown.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Frank Garfunkel. That's going to take a lot out of him.
A short right from Slinga.
Garfunkel is trying to force a seperation but Slinga has the dominant position.
Garfunkel misses with a punch on the inside.
Slinga misses with a hook from the clinch.
Slinga has a couple of punches blocked by Garfunkel.
Slinga prevents a body shot from Garfunkel.
A hook to the body from Slinga.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Slinga misses with a punch on the inside.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Gun Slinga really dominated that round.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

Slinga throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Slinga throws a shot to the body.
Nice body punch from Garfunkel.
Slinga lands with a kick to the ribs.
Garfunkel shoots in for a takedown. "Ole!" shouts Slinga as he jumps to the side.
That kick from Slinga tenderised Garfunkel's leg. Garfunkel is trying to keep his angry face on.
Garfunkel throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Garfunkel takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Slinga connects with a lovely jab that went straight through the gap between Garfunkel's hands.
Garfunkel looks to land a left hand but Slinga moved out of range nicely.
Garfunkel misses with a left hand
and Slinga counters with a straight right hand.
Garfunkel uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Slinga.
Slinga pushes Garfunkel away with a front kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Slinga connects with a body shot.
It's got to the stage where if one of these guys blows hard enough, the other might fall over.
A shot to the body from Garfunkel misses
enabling Slinga to counter with a crisp jab.
Slinga swinging wildly here.
Slinga clobbers Garfunkel with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Garfunkel.
Slinga tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Garfunkel paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Slinga ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.
Slinga misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Garfunkel throwing a counter right hand but Slinga manages to avoid it.
Nice jab there from Slinga.
Slinga swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Garfunkel keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
Slinga comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Slinga cracks Garfunkel with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Garfunkel keeps the fight on the outside.
An attempted straight right counter from Garfunkel misses the target.
Slinga scores with a push kick.
Slinga fakes and then throws a beautiful body shot. Garfunkel looks a bit winded and takes a step backwards to take a breath.
Slinga cracks a nice hook into Garfunkel's ribs.
Slinga ducks right into an uppercut from Garfunkel.
Garfunkel misses with a hook. Slinga ducked under it nicely.
Garfunkel uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Slinga.
Garfunkel misses with a takedown attempt - Slinga sprawls well and throws a nice strike on the way out which just misses.
Garfunkel looks to land a right hand but Slinga moved out of range.
Garfunkel misses with a looping left.
Slinga throws the kick towards the body but Garfunkel avoids it.
Slinga tries to clinch there but Garfunkel circles away.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Garfunkel swings widly with a right hand
enabling Slinga to counter with a crisp jab.
Garfunkel misses with a wild body shot.
Garfunkel will be looking to protect his midsection after taking some solid kicks to the body.

Garfunkel drives through with a takedown into Slinga's guard. Let's see what he can do from the top position.
Slinga is trying to control the position but Garfunkel postures up.
Slinga wants to sweep here but Garfunkel controlling him for the moment.
Garfunkel trying to control the position from guard on top but Slinga is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Garfunkel working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Slinga is trying to keep Garfunkel in close.
Slinga keeping moving, preventing Garfunkel from controlling successfully.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
There's a bit of a scramble here and now Slinga is on top in guard.

Slinga seems content to control from guard here. He's going to have to remain active though if he doesn't want to get stood back up.

Garfunkel escapes his hips to the side and looks to be working for an armbar. Slinga gives him a little smile and shakes his head. No chance.
Slinga is looking to advance position but Garfunkel has hit a scissor sweep - now he's on top in mount!

Slinga in a bad spot here, taking shots to the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Gun Slinga dominated that fourth round.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business. The crowd applaud as we get ready to start the final round!

Garfunkel uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Slinga.
Slinga fakes the leg kick and cracks Garfunkel in the body.
Slinga throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
Garfunkel lands a lovely overhand right.

The cut above Gun Slinga's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
Slinga has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Garfunkel finds it's way round the side to connect with Slinga's head.
Slinga tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Garfunkel manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
A slapping leg kick lands for Garfunkel.
Slinga lands a jab to Garfunkel's midsection.
Slinga explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work.
Garfunkel stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Slinga.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Slinga with a nice cross.
Garfunkel swinging wildly here.
Slinga takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Slinga gets a clinch.
Slinga swings wildly with an uppercut but Garfunkel uses good head movement to avoid it.
Garfunkel is hobbling a little on that front leg after taking quite a few leg kicks so far in this fight.
Garfunkel blocks a body shot from Slinga.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Slinga.
Slinga stalling against the cage.
Garfunkel is looking to break free of the clinch but Slinga has double underhooks.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Slinga.
Slinga lands a hook to the side of the head.
Garfunkel lands a hook to the side of the head.

Gun Slinga's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.
Slinga misses with a hook to the ribs.
Garfunkel blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Frank Garfunkel has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Slinga gets through Garfunkel's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Garfunkel cracks Slinga with a nice body shot.
A nice left hand lands by Slinga.
Garfunkel tries to pull guard but Slinga won't allow it.
Slinga is trying to stall.
Slinga scores with a nice hook to the head.
Garfunkel is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables Slinga to keep the fight standing.
Slinga struggles to land a body shot inside as Garfunkel controls his hands.
Slinga misses with a short punch on the inside.
Garfunkel swings wildly with an uppercut but Slinga uses good head movement to avoid it.
Slinga swings wildly with an uppercut but Garfunkel uses good head movement to avoid it.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
A right hook to the body lands for Slinga.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Slinga holding his opponent close, against the cage.
Garfunkel throws a head punch that misses.
The pace slowing considerably in the clinch, as Slinga takes a break from that fighting nonsense to think about the finer things in life.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Slinga.
Garfunkel blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Slinga working aggressively here.
Garfunkel is trying to pull guard but Slinga has him pressed against the cage.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Frank Garfunkel. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Garfunkel tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Slinga working aggressively here.
Slinga tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Slinga misses with the head strike.
A nice left hand lands by Slinga.
Garfunkel fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Garfunkel.
A shot in the inside from Slinga.
A nice left hand lands by Slinga.
Slinga is trying to stall.
Garfunkel tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Garfunkel has a couple of punches blocked by Slinga.
Garfunkel throws a head punch that misses.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Garfunkel.
A short body shot lands from Slinga as the two fighters clinch.
Gun Slinga is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Garfunkel.

And that's the end of the fight!
Gun Slinga comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
I think Slinga has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 5 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Daniel Franklin scores the fight 46:49
Judge Gwen Towbar scores the fight 46:49
Judge Robert Twigg scores the fight 46:49

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Gun Slinga! Gun Slinga retains his super heavyweight title!
During a confident post fight interview, Gun Slinga thanked all his fans. He seemed very genuine when describing how motivated his fans keep him.