PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Jamie Lesnar (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Roger Tiddlywinks (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Tiddlywinks is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by The Seinfeld Intro. I'm sure you'll be fascinated to know that I was talking to some pointless Z list celebrity before the fight and he thought that Roger Tiddlywinks was going to win. Let's see if he was right.

Lesnar
vs
Tiddlywinks

191 cm
20
265 lbs
6 - 2 - 0

197 cm
21
265 lbs
4 - 2 - 0

Good wrestling
Solid boxing
Very strong

Decent wrestler
Lethal high kicks
Good gas tank

KAISER Nutrition - Q160/$250

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 6 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Jamie Lesnar!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Roger Tiddlywinks!
The judges for this bout are George Francis, Tiny Johnson and Alan Glass.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Lesnar looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
Tiddlywinks lunges at Lesnar with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Lesnar's hand.
Lesnar looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Lesnar dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Tiddlywinks has been working on his striking defense in training and it's paying off as Lesnar is landing a low percentage of strikes.
Lesnar shoots and misses
enabling Tiddlywinks to counter with a crisp jab.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick that Lesnar semi-blocks.
Lesnar lands a right hook to the body.
Tiddlywinks lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Lesnar swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Lesnar is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Tiddlywinks.
Tiddlywinks raises up his leg as if looking to counter with a high kick.
Lesnar throws a hook but Tiddlywinks avoids it easily.
Lesnar swings and misses with a hook to the body.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Lesnar scores with a jab to the body.
Tiddlywinks moves into range and lands a nice body kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Lesnar takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick that connects with a bit of head and a bit of hand.
Lesnar just misses with a punch to the body.
A countering left hand to the body from Tiddlywinks misses.
Lesnar darts in looking for a takedown but Tiddlywinks gets double underhooks and turns Lesnar into the cage.
Tiddlywinks fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and Lesnar has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.
Tiddlywinks throws a sloppy head kick and Lesnar moves out of range easily.
Lesnar takes a kick to the side of the head.

It looks like Jamie Lesnar has been cut.
Crunch! Tiddlywinks slams his shin into Lesnar's torso.
Tiddlywinks lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Lesnar misses with a hook
and Tiddlywinks counters with an outside leg kick.
Tiddlywinks scores with a head kick.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Tiddlywinks moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
Tiddlywinks looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick that looked like it stung.
Lesnar shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.
Lesnar blocks a head kick by Tiddlywinks.
The fighters circle momentarily. Tiddlywinks darts into range and connects with a nice straight punch.
Lesnar connects with a looping left hand that seems like it dazed Tiddlywinks momentarily.

Tiddlywinks lands a high kick to the side of Lesnar's head that stuns him and send him tumbling down to the canvas! Tiddlywinks dives into guard, looking to finish.

Lesnar is rocked!

Lesnar is working an open guard so Tiddlywinks takes the opportunity to get back to his feet.
Oh Lesnar is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!!
Lesnar swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Lesnar seems to have got his legs back now.
Lesnar misses the shot to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Lesnar tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Lesnar misses with a body shot.
Tiddlywinks is looking for the big counter here.
A big right from Lesnar misses.
Tiddlywinks looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Lesnar shoots in for a takedown. "I don't think so" says Tiddlywinks as he avoids it easily.
Tiddlywinks unleashes a big counter combination but Lesnar bobs and weaves and avoids any damage.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Jamie Lesnar. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Tiddlywinks scores with a nice right hand.
A head kick misses from Tiddlywinks.
Tiddlywinks throws a jab but it's blocked by Lesnar.
Lesnar drops down looking for a counter takedown but Tiddlywinks sprawls and moves away.
Lesnar dodges the punch combination from Tiddlywinks.
Tiddlywinks scores with a jab to the jaw.
Lesnar is looking to wear down Tiddlywinks with body shots, infact he's throwing more body shots than head shots at the moment.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Tiddlywinks cracks Lesnar with a big right hand and Lesnar goes down!
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Tiddlywinks wants to get up but he can't break Lesnar's closed guard. He needs to be careful trying to break the legs open, as he's open to submissions here.
Tiddlywinks must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.
Tiddlywinks stopping the sweep attempt from Lesnar.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Tiddlywinks is looking to stand up but Lesnar won't let him.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Roger Tiddlywinks dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Jamie Lesnar's cut.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action.

Tiddlywinks lands a head kick. Lesnar smiles back at him and beckons him forward.
Tiddlywinks throws a front kick that sends Lesnar stumbling back into the cage.
Tiddlywinks connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Tiddlywinks throws a body kick that misses.
Lesnar feinted with a counter takedown.
Tiddlywinks lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Tiddlywinks jabs Lesnar to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Tiddlywinks misses with a few strikes there.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick but Lesnar moves out of range.
Lesnar tries to counter with a takedown but Tiddlywinks is quick to defend against it.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Tiddlywinks keeps Lesnar at a distance using the push kick.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Tiddlywinks throws a sloppy head kick and Lesnar moves out of range easily.
Lesnar tries to counter with a takedown but Tiddlywinks is quick to defend against it.
Tiddlywinks uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Lesnar.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A solid leg kick lands there for Tiddlywinks.
Roger Tiddlywinks is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Tiddlywinks uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Tiddlywinks misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lesnar avoids a kick to the body.
Lesnar feinted with a counter takedown.
Lesnar ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Tiddlywinks moves away.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick that misses.
Lesnar tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Tiddlywinks was well out of range. Poor timing from Lesnar.
A looping hook to the body misses from Lesnar. Tiddlywinks does a little dance to reset his feet.
Lesnar avoids a kick to the body.
Tiddlywinks pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Lesnar was looking to counter that last move with a shot to the body but he didn't commit.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

Tiddlywinks sets himself and throws a head kick that knocks Lesnar to the ground! Tiddlywinks dives into full mount looking to finish!
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Lesnar is trying to escape the mount.

Tiddlywinks is standing up, even though he is in mount.
Tiddlywinks has been the more effective fighter overall so far.
Tiddlywinks throws out a loose jab but Lesnar uses good head movement to avoid it.
Lesnar has his front leg slapped to the side - a nice low kick landing there from Tiddlywinks.
Tiddlywinks scores with a three punch combo!

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Lesnar avoids the head kick by Tiddlywinks.
Tiddlywinks looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
This is turning into a torrid day at the office for Lesnar. He's trying desperately to land a takedown but he's failing miserably and getting slapped silly on the feet to compound his misery.
Tiddlywinks misses with a head kick.
Tiddlywinks throws a head kick that half lands.
Lesnar misses with a hook.
A countering left hand to the body from Tiddlywinks misses.
Roger Tiddlywinks seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Tiddlywinks buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Tiddlywinks lands an uppercut out of nowhere! Lesnar falls backwards - clearly groggy! Tiddlywinks dives in and finishes the fight with more strikes for a TKO finish!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:41 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Roger Tiddlywinks!
Roger Tiddlywinks took to the mic in his post fight interview and said 'Im going to get a ice cream sunday yay!'.