PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Voljin Ulfzaar (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Tommy Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Thundercunt has chosen You are a Cunt as his entrance music. Both these fighters are unbeaten, so somebody's 0 has got to go!Tommy Thundercunt has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?

Ulfzaar
vs
Thundercunt

193 cm
26
270 lbs
13 - 0 - 0

197 cm
25
260 lbs
5 - 0 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Excellent MT
Very quick

Decent wrestler
Great elbows
Good gas tank

Sully's Bar & Grill
Leviathan Clothing

Sully's Bar & Grill

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 13 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Voljin Ulfzaar!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Tommy Thundercunt!
The judges for this bout are Michael Johnstone, Santiago Holmes and Daniel Franklin.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Ulfzaar tries to clinch up.
Ulfzaar drops his hands and takes a jab to the jaw for his troubles.

It looks like Voljin Ulfzaar has been cut.
A jab from Ulfzaar finds it's way through Thundercunt's defenses.

It looks like Tommy Thundercunt has been cut.
Thundercunt throws an off balance right hand

and Ulfzaar holds on and brings the fighters into a clinch.
Ulfzaar can't find room to land a body shot as Thundercunt controls the action.
Ulfzaar goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Ulfzaar misses with a punch on the inside.
Thundercunt misses with a body punch.
Ulfzaar tries a body shot but Thundercunt blocks it.
Ulfzaar misses with a punch on the inside.
Thundercunt blocking some punches.
A head punch on the inside from Ulfzaar fails to land.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thundercunt is leaning against Ulfzaar and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
Thundercunt lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Ulfzaar lands a hook to the side of the head.
Thundercunt can't find room to land a body shot as Ulfzaar controls the action.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Thundercunt just misses with a elbow thrown towards Ulfzaar's brow.
Thundercunt blocking some punches.
Thundercunt presses Ulfzaar against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Ulfzaar throws a punch but it's blocked by Thundercunt.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ulfzaar scores with a hook to the body.
Thundercunt lands a body shot.
Ulfzaar is breathing heavily.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Thundercunt goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Thundercunt lands a body shot.
Good body shot from Thundercunt.
A short right from Thundercunt on the inside.
A frustrated look appears on Thundercunt's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Thundercunt makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Thundercunt lands a left hand that snaps the head of Ulfzaar backwards.
A short right from Thundercunt on the inside.
Nice body punch from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt lands a body punch in the clinch.
Thundercunt digs a right hand into Ulfzaar's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Ulfzaar's gas tank.
Thundercunt works for underhooks and lands a body shot in the process.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Thundercunt is leaning against Ulfzaar and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
Thundercunt scores with a hook to the body.
Thundercunt lands a nice shot to the body.
Thundercunt has had enough of the clinch but Ulfzaar keeps him there for the moment.
Thundercunt lands a body punch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt scores with a shot to the side of Ulfzaar's head.
Ulfzaar blocks an elbow strike.
A short right from Thundercunt on the inside.
Ulfzaar misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Ulfzaar takes a shot to the head.
Thundercunt comes over the top with an elbow. That landed flush.
A short body shot lands from Thundercunt as the two fighters clinch.

Thundercunt breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.

Thundercunt feints and then winds up with a huge right hand that connects perfectly and sends Ulfzaar sprawling to the canvas! Ulfzaar rolls over backwards and springs off the cage and manages to regain his footing - how acrobatic! Oh, he's still wobbly - can Thundercunt finish him?!

Ulfzaar is rocked!
Ulfzaar walks into a picture perfect straight right hand from Thundercunt! He's gone down face first to the canvas, unconscious before he even hit the floor! Ohhhh. My. Goodness! That boys and girls was a beautiful knockout! Give that man a biscuit!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:36 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Tommy Thundercunt!
Tommy Thundercunt is the new heavyweight champion!
During a confident post fight interview, Tommy Thundercunt thanked all his fans. He seemed very genuine when describing how motivated his fans keep him.