PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Tommy Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Paddy Walker (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Thundercunt comes to the cage accompanied by You are a Cunt. I don't know about you partner, but I'm pumped for this one!

Thundercunt
vs
Walker

197 cm
26
260 lbs
13 - 0 - 0

190 cm
26
269 lbs
8 - 4 - 0

Decent wrestler
Great elbows
Cardio machine

BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

Sully's Bar & Grill

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 13 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Tommy Thundercunt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Paddy Walker!
The judges for this bout are Santiago Holmes, Bart Greer and Sandra Marshall.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Walker jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Walker avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
A jab from Walker does it's job there.

It looks like Tommy Thundercunt has been cut.
Thundercunt uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Walker.
Thundercunt was looking to counter that last move with a shot to the body but he didn't commit.
Walker lands with a nice body punch.
Thundercunt looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Thundercunt moves into range and connects with a jab.
Walker ducks under a wild hook from Thundercunt.
Walker scores with a three punch combo!
Thundercunt with a nice cross.
Thundercunt avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Walker rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
letting Thundercunt counter with a right hand.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Walker swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
As Walker tries to get set, Thundercunt tries to push him back and clinch up but Walker manages to avoid the attempt.
Walker throws a lazy right hand but Thundercunt sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Thundercunt appeared to be looking to counter that last move with a leg kick.
Thundercunt misses with a body shot.
Walker swings widly with a right hand

and Thundercunt counters by moving into the clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Walker can't find room to land a body shot as Thundercunt controls the action.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Thundercunt.
Walker goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Walker swings wildly with an uppercut but Thundercunt uses good head movement to avoid it.
A body shot lands from Walker.
Thundercunt throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
A hook to the body from Thundercunt.
Walker looks winded!

Thundercunt breaks from the clinch.
Thundercunt pounces like a tiger and cracks Walker with a vicious hook! Walker is down but not out! Thundercunt follows up with more strikes forcing the ref to jump in and stop it!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:34 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Punches). Tommy Thundercunt!
During a confident post fight interview, Tommy Thundercunt thanked all his fans. He seemed very genuine when describing how motivated his fans keep him.