PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a lightweight MMA rules bout between Slow Dumb Cunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Theo Bradley (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Slow Dumb Cunt has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

Dumb Cunt
vs
Bradley

179 cm
18
160 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

162 cm
18
162 lbs
2 - 3 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
KO power

BJJ Blue Belt
Counter fighter
Very confident

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the lightweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of London, Slow Dumb Cunt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 2 - 3 - 0, fighting out of London, Theo Bradley!
The judges for this bout are Donald Grub, Chris Edwards and Sam Margolis.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Bradley avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Bradley appears to be waiting to throw a counter punch to the body.

Dumb Cunt closes the distance and pushes Bradley back into the cage.
Bradley lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.

Bradley gets the body lock takedown. After a quick scramble, Dumb Cunt regains guard.
Bradley's corner is telling him to maintain position.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Bradley works a leg free and moves into half guard.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
Bradley not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Dumb Cunt knows he needs to get back to his feet asap. He's simply no match for Bradley on the ground.
Bradley throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
Bradley uses his free foot to push down on Dumb Cunt's thigh. Eventually he works his other foot free and he's advanced to mount - this is trouble for Dumb Cunt.
Bradley in mount throwing good strikes here, bouncing his opponent's head off the canvas.
Bradley connects with a couple of good shots from mount.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Bradley breaks from Dumb Cunt's wrist control and lands an elbow.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bradley breaks from Dumb Cunt's wrist control and lands an elbow.
Bradley lands a shot to the body, followed up by a shot to the exposed head of his trapped opponent.
Bradley is in the full mount, landing strikes.
Bradley controlling the pace for now.
Bradley dominating with strikes here.

Bradley has hold of an arm here, looking to extend it. He's committed to the armbar attempt here! Will he get it?! Yes! Dumb Cunt is forced to tap!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:52 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (Armbar). Theo Bradley!
An out of breath Theo Bradley thanked his loyal fans in his post fight interview, giving them credit for his success over the course of his career.