PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a bantamweight MMA rules bout between Noddy Holder (ranked 5740 p4p, 253 weight class) and Broseph Stalin (ranked 4204 p4p, 193 weight class). Holder's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, The loudest voice in Tycoon.. Broseph Stalin will no doubt be trying to keep this one on the feet, where he has a distinct advantage.

Holder
vs
Stalin

164 cm
18
142 lbs
1 - 0 - 0

163 cm
18
147 lbs
1 - 0 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Great elbows
Granite chin

BJJ White Belt
Excellent MT
Granite chin

Real Men Supplements

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the bantamweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Noddy Holder!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Broseph Stalin!
The judges for this bout are Wesley Smith, George Francis and Tiny Johnson.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Holder gets tackled into the cage by Stalin. Stalin maintains the clinch.
Stalin looks more muscular than last time we saw him. He must have been on the weights.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Holder throws an elbow that misses.
Stalin throws a punch but it's blocked by Holder.
Stalin blocks the elbow strike.
Stalin working aggressively here.
Stalin throws a head punch that misses.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
A short right from Stalin on the inside.
Holder blocks a punch to the side of the head.
A short left from Stalin.
Stalin lands an uppercut.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Holder missing with knees to the body.
Holder blocks an uppercut.
A head punch on the inside from Stalin fails to land.
Stalin misses with the head strike.
Holder blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Stalin blocks an elbow strike from Holder.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Stalin blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Stalin dodges an elbow strike from Holder.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Stalin dodges an elbow strike from Holder.
Stalin misses with the head strike.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Holder lands a glancing elbow in the clinch.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Holder.
Holder pushes off and fires off an elbow that misses, before clinching up again, against the cage.
Stalin working aggressively here.
Holder creates a bit of space for himself and sneaks an elbow through Stalin's defenses.
Holder misses with an elbow over the top.
Stalin dodges an elbow strike from Holder.
Holder misses with an elbow strike.
Stalin blocks the elbow strike.
Holder lands an elbow inside.
Holder blocks an uppercut.
Holder misses with a hook to the ribs.
Holder creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Holder pushes off an throws an elbow but Stalin leans to the side and avoids it. We're back to clinching against the cage.
Stalin swings wildly with an uppercut but Holder uses good head movement to avoid it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Stalin lands with a short shot to the head.
Stalin dodges an elbow strike from Holder.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Stalin throws a punch but it's blocked by Holder.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Stalin.
Stalin managing to block the knees to the body from Holder.
Holder throws an elbow that misses.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Stalin lands a left hand.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Holder.
With the fighters up against the cage, Holder throws an elbow but misses.
Stalin lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Stalin lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Holder backwards.
Stalin swings wildly with an uppercut but Holder uses good head movement to avoid it.
Holder throws an elbow that misses.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
Holder creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
Stalin throws a punch but it's blocked by Holder.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Stalin scores with a shoulder strike.
Stalin tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
Stalin avoids a wild elbow strike from Holder.
Stalin swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Holder looks to be in better condition than last time we saw him fight. Obviously he's been working hard on his cardio.
Holder takes a shot to the head.
Holder tries to land a knee to the head but Stalin blocks with his arms.
Stalin blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Stalin swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Holder misses with an elbow strike.
Stalin working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Holder blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
With the fighters up against the cage, Holder throws an elbow but misses.
Stalin blocks an elbow strike.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Holder.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Stalin throws a punch but it's blocked by Holder.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Stalin creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Stalin lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
A shot in the inside from Stalin.
Stalin misses with a short punch on the inside.
With the fighters up against the cage, Holder throws an elbow but misses.
Stalin blocks an elbow strike from Holder.
Stalin misses with a punch on the inside.
A short right from Stalin.
Holder misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Stalin.
With the fighters up against the cage, Holder throws an elbow but misses.
A head punch on the inside from Stalin fails to land.
Holder blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Holder throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Stalin tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
A head punch on the inside from Stalin fails to land.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Stalin.
Stalin avoids a wild elbow strike from Holder.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Broseph Stalin dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

Stalin takes the fight into the clinch.
Stalin throws a head punch that misses.
A short right from Stalin on the inside.
Stalin avoids the elbow strike from Holder, against the cage.
Stalin misses with a short punch on the inside.
Holder blocks an uppercut.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
A head punch on the inside from Stalin fails to land.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Stalin.
Stalin lands a right hand.
Stalin lands with a light punch inside.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Stalin working aggressively here.
A short right from Stalin on the inside.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Holder.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
Stalin tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
Stalin misses with the head strike.
Holder lands a nice elbow from the clinch.
Holder blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Holder has not gone for a single takedown so far in this fight, which seems like a very strange tactic when you consider that he has the superior wrestling and BJJ.
Stalin misses with the head strike.
Stalin dodges an elbow strike from Holder.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
Holder throws an elbow but it misses.
Holder blocking some punches.
Stalin swings wildly with an uppercut but Holder uses good head movement to avoid it.
Holder pushes off an throws an elbow but Stalin leans to the side and avoids it. We're back to clinching against the cage.
Stalin lands a left hand that snaps the head of Holder backwards.
Stalin misses with some punches.
Holder creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
Stalin misses with a short punch on the inside.
Holder misses with an elbow strike.
Stalin working aggressively here.
Holder has a couple of punches blocked by Stalin.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Stalin lands a right hand.
Stalin has been the more effective fighter overall so far.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Holder tries to land knees in the clinch but Stalin avoids the damage to the body.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Holder throws an elbow but it misses.
Stalin takes an elbow to the temple.
Holder throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
Stalin swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Holder throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Stalin blocks the elbow strike.
Stalin on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Stalin takes an elbow to the forehead.
Holder blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Stalin avoids the elbow strike from Holder, against the cage.
Holder lands a damaging elbow.

It looks like Broseph Stalin has been cut.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Stalin lands with a light punch inside.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Stalin lands with a light punch inside.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Stalin.
Holder looks to throw an elbow but misses.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Holder.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Stalin misses with a hook from the clinch.
Holder throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
A nice left hand lands by Stalin.
Holder lands an elbow inside.
Holder lands an elbow inside that Stalin shrugs off.
Stalin gets through Holder's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Stalin throws a head punch that misses.
Stalin blocks an elbow strike from Holder.
Stalin tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Holder blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Holder misses with an elbow over the top.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Stalin lands with a right to the head.
Stalin misses with a punch on the inside.
Stalin scores with a shoulder strike.
Stalin avoids the elbow strike from Holder, against the cage.
Stalin avoids the elbow strike from Holder, against the cage.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Holder misses with an elbow strike.
Stalin tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Holder lands an elbow just above Stalin 's eye.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Holder blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Holder.
Holder pushes off an throws an elbow but Stalin leans to the side and avoids it. We're back to clinching against the cage.
Holder blocking some punches.
Stalin lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Holder just misses with a elbow thrown towards Stalin's brow.
Stalin working some nice short punches in the clinch.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Stalin.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Broseph Stalin showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
The cut man is working on Broseph Stalin's cut.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final round!

Holder clinches.
Stalin fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Holder creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Stalin lands with a right to the head.
Holder creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
A shot in the inside from Stalin.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Holder.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Stalin swings wildly with an uppercut but Holder uses good head movement to avoid it.
Holder throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Holder throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Broseph Stalin seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Holder misses with the head strike.
Stalin swings wildly with an uppercut but Holder uses good head movement to avoid it.
Holder throws an elbow but it misses.
Stalin lands with a short punch from the clinch.

Stalin connects with a big uppercut there that sends Holder tumbling to the ground! Stalin follows him down into his guard.

Holder is rocked!
Stalin must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Holder looking to control the pace of the fight rather than finish it.
Oh Holder is still in real trouble! Will he be able to recover?!!

Stalin stands up and waves to Holder to follow him.

Stalin drives through and clinches with Holder against the cage.
Holder seems to have got his legs back now.
Holder swings wildly with an uppercut but Stalin uses good head movement to avoid it.
Stalin lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Stalin has a couple of punches blocked by Holder.
Stalin blocks an elbow strike from Holder.
Stalin dips a shoulder and cracks Holder with a mighty uppercut! Holder falls back against the cage and Stalin unloads with a barrage of strikes! Holder is completely out with his eyes open, only supported by the cage! Save him ref! Eventually the ref decides to do his job and jumps in - Stalin screams abuse at the incompetent official before going over to celebrate with his corner. Brutal stuff!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:49 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Broseph Stalin!
Broseph Stalin seemed lost for words in his post fight interview but he remembered to thank his fans and directed everyone to his website.
Noddy Holder spoke after the fight, saying 'It's CHRISTMAS!!!'.