PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Ron Burgundy (ranked 1159 p4p, 188 weight class) and Elijah Pitakaka (ranked 10564 p4p, 705 weight class). Pitakaka is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by my dick. The fight MMA fans around the world have waited their entire lives for!

Burgundy
vs
Pitakaka

188 cm
41
215 lbs
55 - 22 - 1

189 cm
43
217 lbs
30 - 35 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
Excellent MT
Knockout power

Zenith Nutrition (160q/$200)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 55 - 22 - 1, fighting out of Montreal, Ron Burgundy!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 30 - 35 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Elijah Pitakaka!
The judges for this bout are Ian Loll, Alec Ball and Dillan Fox.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Pitakaka misses with a body kick.
Burgundy blocks a leg kick.
Burgundy moves out of range of the body kick from Pitakaka.
Burgundy blocks a head kick by Pitakaka.
Jab from Pitakaka.
This fight brought to you by 5M nutrition - it's mmmmm tasty. Nice jab by Burgundy.
Burgundy on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
Pitakaka tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Burgundy misses with a looping right.
A left lands for Burgundy.
Burgundy misses with a double jab.
Pitakaka thinks about the counter body kick.

Burgundy lands a left and a right that send Pitakaka crashing to the mat, dazed. Burgundy thinks about following him to the mat but decides to wave him back up to his feet!

It looks like Elijah Pitakaka has been cut.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
A head kick misses from Pitakaka.
Pitakaka misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Burgundy counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena.
A head kick misses from Pitakaka.

Burgundy lands a big uppercut and Pitakaka crumbles to the floor! The ref thinks about stopping the fight but Pitakaka looks OK. Burgundy waves Pitakaka back to his feet!

Pitakaka is rocked!
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!
Burgundy thuds a left hand into Pitakaka's body.
Pitakaka is still on wobbly legs! Can Burgundy finish him?
Pitakaka looks winded!
Pitakaka circles to his right, straight into a beautiful hook by Burgundy. Pitakaka falls face first into the canvas - great knockout victory for Burgundy!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:50 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Ron Burgundy!
Ron Burgundy gave a mention to Spartan Nutrition in his post fight interview. That will please them (and hopefully generate some sales).