PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Holger The Dane (ranked 793 p4p, 101 weight class) and Humbert Humbert (ranked 1709 p4p, 202 weight class). Humbert is bobbing his head along to his entrance song: Babylon 5. Both fighter's entrance songs getting the crowd jumping here.

The Dane
vs
Humbert

177 cm
38
180 lbs
16 - 13 - 0

170 cm
30
185 lbs
20 - 9 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Excellent grappler
World class boxer
Granite chin

Sin City Allstars

Groove Gear
Freebok (85% Laundry)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 16 - 13 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Holger The Dane!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 20 - 9 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Humbert Humbert!
The judges for this bout are Aleksandr Martynov, Valeri Chadov and Dmitry Maklakov.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
The Dane throws the kick towards the body but Humbert avoids it.
Humbert avoids the head kick by The Dane.
Humbert misses with a wild body shot.
A good leg kick by The Dane.
The Dane missing with a left hand there. Humbert was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
The Dane connects with an inside leg kick.
A slow jab from The Dane misses its intended target.
The Dane tries to move into range but Humbert moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
The Dane misses with a body kick.
The Dane lands with a kick to the ribs.
The Dane takes a solid shot to the body. That one hurt him but he's trying not to show it.
The Dane swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Humbert throws an overhand right that lands on The Dane's shoulder, as The Dane tries to avoid the shot.
Humbert scores with a jab. The Dane acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
The Dane looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Humbert lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
The Dane doesn't react quick enough there as he takes a shot to the body.
Humbert fakes and then throws a beautiful body shot. The Dane looks a bit winded and takes a step backwards to take a breath.
The Dane slips under a jab from Humbert.
The Dane connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Humbert throws a hook but The Dane avoids it easily.

That's one minute gone in the round.
The Dane closes the distance looking to clinch
and Humbert counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body.
Humbert on the wrong end of a nice hook.
The Dane keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Humbert.
The Dane looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
The Dane looks to score with a jab to the body but Humbert is just out of range.
Humbert takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Humbert with a jab.
Humbert checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
Holger The Dane seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Good work by Humbert as he checks the leg kick.
The Dane slips under a jab from Humbert.
The Dane uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Humbert.
The fighters circling - The Dane throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
The Dane pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
The Dane avoids the body shot from Humbert.
Humbert swings for the body but The Dane moves out of range.
Humbert throws a hard body shot but it just misses.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The Dane swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Humbert throws the left hand but The Dane avoids the punch easily.
Humbert tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Humbert moves out of range as The Dane strikes.
Humbert wants to counter the offense by The Dane and move into the clinch position.
Humbert misses with the combination.
Humbert throws the left hand but The Dane avoids the punch easily.
Humbert defending well as The Dane loads up on a big left hand.
The Dane moves out of range as Humbert strikes.
The Dane thinks about countering with a head kick.
Humbert swings for the body but The Dane moves out of range.
A telegraphed right hand from The Dane misses the target.
Humbert uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by The Dane.
The Dane throws a series of punches but Humbert moves out of range.
The Dane lands with an overhand left.
Humbert displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as The Dane throws out the jab.
The Dane connects with a looping left hand that seems like it dazed Humbert momentarily.
The Dane lands with a slapping head kick.
Humbert thows a left - swing and a miss!
Humbert just manages to avoid a counter high kick fromThe Dane.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Humbert lands a jab. Then a cross. Then finally a nice hook to the body. Good work there by Humbert.

It looks like Holger The Dane has been cut.
Humbert throws a jab when The Dane was well out of range.
The Dane moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.
Humbert misses with a straight right.
Humbert thows a left - swing and a miss!
Humbert scores with a crisp jab that stopped The Dane in his tracks.
The Dane tries to work over Humbert's front leg with a kick but Humbert checks it.
Humbert misses the shot to the body.
The Dane lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
The Dane lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
The Dane lands a front kick.
Humbert moves away from the strike by The Dane.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Humbert takes a jab right on the kisser.
The Dane throws an overhand right that lands on Humbert's shoulder, as Humbert tries to avoid the shot.
The Dane misses with a low kick.
Humbert with the counter takedown but The Dane avoids it easily.
Humbert takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
Good standup being displayed there by The Dane as he connects with a hook.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The Dane lands a jab.
The Dane attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
The Dane throws a sloppy head kick and Humbert moves out of range easily.
Humbert avoids the body shot from The Dane.
Humbert throws a combination but it was largely blocked by The Dane.
Humbert fakes high and swings low for a body shot but The Dane manages to avoid it.
The Dane throws a right and a left that Humbert avoids nicely.
The Dane misses with a low kick.
Humbert looks to throw the jab but The Dane is out of range.
The Dane misses with a body shot.
The Dane misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Humbert feints the counter takedown.
The Dane throws a nice looking combination but Humbert bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
The Dane throws a hook to the side of Humbert's head but Humbert sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Humbert misses with a body punch
and The Dane counters with a left and a right that stings Humbert.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
The Dane is moving around nicely and scores here with a single head shot.
Humbert misses with a lunging right hand
and The Dane counters with a leg kick.
Humbert connects with a good right hand that stumbles The Dane. The Dane circles away out of range and recomposes himself.
Nice uppercut there from The Dane.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Holger The Dane dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Holger The Dane's cut.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.

The fight moves into the clinch position.
The Dane is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Humbert can do to turn this around?
Humbert tries to throw a body punch but The Dane avoids it by throwing Humbert back against the cage.

Humbert drags the fight down to the ground.
The Dane content to stall in guard here.
The Dane has to be careful here, sitting in the guard of a superior BJJ player.

Humbert is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle.

Humbert looking for a guillotine here but The Dane defends easily.
Humbert can't do much from the bottom at the moment, as The Dane controls the pace.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.

That's one minute gone in the round.
The Dane wants to lay and pray for a moment but Humbert keeps working.
Humbert is moving his hips around well on the bottom and has managed to get back to half guard.

Humbert is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but The Dane pulls his head out easily.
Humbert is looking for a sweep. The Dane is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.

The Dane postures up and decides to stand up, from the half guard. The ref calls for Humbert to stand up.
The Dane moves out of range of the strikes.
As Humbert looks to move away, The Dane throws a big counter combo but Humbert just gets out of the way.
Humbert throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and The Dane counters with a nice uppercut.
Humbert jabs The Dane to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Holger The Dane is winning the standup battle so far.
The Dane connects with a good right hand that stumbles Humbert. Humbert circles away out of range and recomposes himself.
The Dane uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Humbert.
The Dane swung with a counter punch to the body but it didn't connect.
The Dane bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Humbert will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
The Dane is looking to land body kicks.
Humbert wants to counter with a clinch but The Dane pushes him away.
Humbert throws out a powerful jab.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Humbert looks to land a right hand but The Dane moved out of range.
Humbert has his front leg slapped to the side - a nice low kick landing there from The Dane.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.

The Dane clinches up against the cage.
The Dane lands a nice knee to the body.
The Dane is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.
The Dane gets through Humbert's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Humbert misses with a hook to the ribs.
The Dane tries to throw a body punch but Humbert avoids it by throwing The Dane back against the cage.
Humbert lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of The Dane backwards.
The Dane throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Humbert blocks it with crossed arms.
Humbert lands a left hand.
Humbert takes a knee to the side of the body.
Humbert tries to pull guard but The Dane forces him back to his feet, against the cage.
The Dane swings wildly with an uppercut but Humbert uses good head movement to avoid it.
Humbert tries to pull guard but The Dane forces him back to his feet, against the cage.
The Dane can't find room to land a body shot as Humbert controls the action.
Humbert misses with a shot to the kidneys.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Humbert swings wildly with an uppercut but The Dane uses good head movement to avoid it.
Humbert throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
Humbert digs a right hand into The Dane's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on The Dane's gas tank.
Humbert is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables The Dane to keep the fight standing.
Holger The Dane has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Humbert Humbert.

Humbert manages to pull guard. Let's see whether he can land a sub off his back.
The Dane tries to free his leg and advance position but Humbert is retaining full guard.

Humbert is looking for a guillotine. You can't force these things though and The Dane defends well.
The Dane passes Humbert's right leg, so he's now in half guard.

Humbert actively working from the bottom here.
The Dane controlling the action here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Humbert actively working from the bottom here.
Humbert gets back to full guard.

The Dane avoids a guillotine attempt easily.

The Dane avoids a guillotine attempt easily.
The Dane seems content to control from guard here. He's going to have to remain active though if he doesn't want to get stood back up.

The Dane gets to his feet and steps away from his opponent.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Holger The Dane will probably get the nod.
The cut man is working on Holger The Dane's cut.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. This is the final round!

Humbert tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but The Dane was well out of range. Poor timing from Humbert.
Humbert blocks a head kick by The Dane.
Humbert on the wrong end of a kick to the body.
The Dane blocks a jab.
Humbert showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from The Dane.
Humbert moves out of range of the body kick from The Dane.
The Dane lands with a good body shot.
The Dane misses with a wild body shot.
Humbert defending well as The Dane loads up on a big left hand.
Humbert fakes high and swings low for a body shot but The Dane manages to avoid it.
The Dane fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Humbert.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
The Dane throws a hook to the side of Humbert's head but Humbert sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
The Dane throws out a loose jab but Humbert uses good head movement to avoid it.
Humbert thuds a left hand into The Dane's body.
The Dane finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
Humbert avoids the head kick by The Dane.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A big right from The Dane misses.
The Dane tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
A looping hook to the body misses from Humbert. The Dane does a little dance to reset his feet.
The Dane throws a body shot but no joy.
Humbert connects with a good right hand that stumbles The Dane. The Dane circles away out of range and recomposes himself.
Humbert uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from The Dane.
The Dane uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Humbert.
Humbert throws a hook but The Dane blocks it.
The Dane uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Humbert.
The Dane throws a lazy body kick

and Humbert counters with a driving takedown into guard. Nice work there by Humbert.
The Dane wants to control here, rather than go for any submissions from the bottom. At least for now.
Humbert postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Humbert trying to control but The Dane is working from the bottom.
The Dane is controlling Humbert's posture.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
There's a bit of a scramble here and now The Dane is on top in guard.

The Dane has decided he wants to stand but the closed guard of Humbert is proving hard to escape from.

Humbert looking for a guillotine here but The Dane defends easily.

Humbert is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
The Dane not doing a lot at the moment. He'll have to show some more aggression or the fight will get stood up.
Humbert Humbert has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's three minutes gone in the round.
The Dane wants to get up but he can't break Humbert's closed guard. He needs to be careful trying to break the legs open, as he's open to submissions here.
The Dane tries to free his leg and advance position but Humbert is retaining full guard.
The Dane controlling from the top position.

Humbert looks to be working for a triangle here. Oh, it looks like he might have it! The Dane has picked Humbert up and slammed him! Humbert can't keep hold of the triangle and The Dane manages to pass to side control!
Humbert tries to buck The Dane off but The Dane is having none of it.
The Dane gets to mount! Humbert was on the offensive and wasn't defending properly.
Humbert is working to get back to half guard.
The Dane controlling the position easily from mount.
Holger The Dane is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Humbert tries to get back to half guard but can't.
Humbert regains half guard.

Humbert looking to work for a kimura from the bottom.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
The Dane keeping composed on the top, looking to control the action.

And that's the end of the fight!
Holger The Dane showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for The Dane, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Aleksandr Martynov scores the fight 30:28
Judge Valeri Chadov scores the fight 30:27
Judge Dmitry Maklakov scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Holger The Dane!
A very excited looking Holger The Dane made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.