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Play
by Play - Fighter's Fight Commentary
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Event:
Quick Fight Championship
Date: May 19, 2016 |
#R1##CL2#
Assklown I I I takes the fight into the clinch.
Thomson is trying to pull guard but Assklown I I I turns him against the cage and we stay in the clinch.
Thomson holding his opponent close, against the cage.
Assklown I I I working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Assklown I I I scores with a shot to the side of Thomson 's head.
Thomson jumps guard but his hands slip and he falls flat on his back. Well, he's made himself look a right mug there, as Assklown I I I walks away with a smile on his face. Thomson gets slowly back to his feet and shakes his head.
Assklown I I I scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
Assklown I I I tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Thomson manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Assklown I I I tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Thomson paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Assklown I I I comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Thomson fails with a takedown attempt.
It seemed like Assklown I I I was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Blake Thomson . That's going to take a lot out of him.
Good exchange - Assklown I I I coming out on top.#KD2#
Assklown I I I drops Thomson with a hook right on the temple. He thinks about going to the ground but Thomson looks back up at him and smiles so Assklown I I I waves him back to his feet - he obviously thinks he can knock him out after that shot landed.
#ROC2#
Thomson is rocked!
This has been an exciting period of action!
Assklown I I I is looking for an opening here. He's unloaded a big left hand that catches Thomson flush on the jaw and sends him tumbling to the canvas! Thomson is out cold! Assklown I I I holds back from landing any unnecessary shots to his unconscious opponent, as the referee reacts slowly to the situation. A brutal knockout and then some excellent sportsmanship - this guy is my new favorite fighter!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:58 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Benji Assklown I I I!
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Event:
Quick Fight Championship
Date: May 06, 2016 |
#R1#
Lamp on the wrong end of a nice jab.
Lamp has a takedown stuffed.
Assklown I I I looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Lamp tries to clinch but Assklown I I I is having none of it.
Assklown I I I was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Lamp tries to clinch
and Assklown I I I counters with a straight right hand.
Assklown I I I scores with a shot to the body.
Assklown I I I dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Assklown I I I punishes Lamp's body with a nice straight punch.
Lamp throws a body punch but Assklown I I I moves out of range.
Lamp fails with an attempt to clinch.
Assklown I I I swung with a counter right hand that didn't connect.
Assklown I I I lands a really nice looking cross but Lamp seems unphased.
Assklown I I I circles away from the clinch attempt
and Assklown I I I counters with a left to the body.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Decent striking displayed by Assklown I I I there.
Assklown I I I bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Lamp's head.#ROC#
Lamp is rocked!
Conveniently Shaped Lamp seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.#T1#
Assklown I I I's jab looks to have found its range, popping Lamp under the eye.
Lamp is still on wobbly legs! Can Assklown I I I finish him?#KD#
Assklown I I I drops Lamp with a hook right on the temple. He thinks about going to the ground but Lamp looks back up at him and smiles so Assklown I I I waves him back to his feet - he obviously thinks he can knock him out after that shot landed.
Lamp fails with an attempt to clinch.
Lamp is looking to clinch but Assklown I I I is avoiding it.
Lamp seems to have recovered his senses.
Lamp takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
Lamp misses with a takedown attempt
and Assklown I I I counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!#CL2#
Lamp instigates a clinch.
Assklown I I I tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Lamp blocks a body shot from Assklown I I I.
Lamp content to slow the pace in the clinch.
Assklown I I I throws a punch but it's blocked by Lamp.
Assklown I I I fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
#T2#
Assklown I I I tries a body shot but Lamp blocks it.
Assklown I I I lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Lamp is trying to pull guard but Assklown I I I has him pressed against the cage.
Benji Assklown I I I has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Conveniently Shaped Lamp.
Lamp is looking for a takedown.
A shot in the inside from Assklown I I I.
Assklown I I I lands a nice uppercut.
Assklown I I I scores with a shoulder strike.
Assklown I I I lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Assklown I I I scores with a shoulder strike.
Assklown I I I tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Assklown I I I misses with a hook to the ribs.
Assklown I I I lands an uppercut.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Assklown I I I.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Assklown I I I. #T3#
Nice body punch from Assklown I I I - that landed with a thud.
Assklown I I I tries to work over Lamp's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Lamp tries to work over Assklown I I I's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Assklown I I I swings wildly with an uppercut but Lamp uses good head movement to avoid it.
Assklown I I I lands a hook that snaps the head of Lamp backwards.
Assklown I I I pushes Lamp back against the cage and unloads with a body punch.
Nice body punch from Assklown I I I.
Lamp looks winded!
Lamp prevents a body shot from Assklown I I I.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Assklown I I I.
Assklown I I I lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Assklown I I I pushes Lamp back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
The pace slowing considerably in the clinch, as Lamp takes a break from that fighting nonsense to think about the finer things in life. #T4#
Assklown I I I misses with a punch to the body.
Assklown I I I gets through Lamp's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Assklown I I I.
Assklown I I I blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Lamp drops down looking for an ankle pick but Assklown I I I pulls his leg out and moves away.
Lamp darts in trying to clinch
and Assklown I I I makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
Benji Assklown I I I is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Lamp tries to clinch but Assklown I I I moves away
and Lamp takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Lamp with a lazy takedown attempt
and Lamp takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles. #KD#
Assklown I I I drops Lamp with a beautiful combination! Lamp stares up at his opponent, who ushers him back to his feet - Assklown I I I is looking for the KO!
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Assklown I I I knocks out Lamp with a massive right hand! The ref tackles Assklown I I I before he can follow up with any more strikes and that's it everyone. Assklown I I I picks up the big W with a huge KO!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:55 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Benji Assklown I I I!
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Event:
Quick Fight Championship
Date: Apr 30, 2016 |
#R1#
Assklown I I I tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Kuznetsov paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Assklown I I I shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with Kuznetsov but Kuznetsov pushes him off and we're back to square one.
Assklown I I I misses with a takedown
and Kuznetsov counters with a slapping leg kick.
Assklown I I I has his takedown stuffed#CL#
and Kuznetsov moves into the clinch.
Yuri Kuznetsov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Benji Assklown I I I.
Kuznetsov jumps guard but Assklown I I I stands there with Kuznetsov around his waist. Kuznetsov gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
#BC2#
Assklown I I I breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.#CL#
Kuznetsov gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.#BC2#
Assklown I I I breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Assklown I I I shoots in looking for a takedown but Kuznetsov manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Assklown I I I's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Kuznetsov fails with a takedown attempt from distance.#T1#
Horrible takedown attempt by Assklown I I I or perhaps it was just good defense by Kuznetsov, which made it look bad.
The fight stays on the outside here - Assklown I I I looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Kuznetsov changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Assklown I I I tries to avoid it but Kuznetsov manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Assklown I I I to the ground. Assklown I I I escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Assklown I I I throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around Kuznetsov's waist but Kuznetsov gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing Assklown I I I off to one side.
No luck for Assklown I I I with that takedown attempt.
Assklown I I I swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Kuznetsov will have to do better than that with his takedown attempts.
Assklown I I I is looking for the big counter here.#CL#
Kuznetsov clinches up against the cage.
Assklown I I I can't break the clinch.
Kuznetsov can't get the takedown.
#T2#
Kuznetsov can't find room to land a body shot as Assklown I I I controls the action.
#TD#
Kuznetsov jumps into guard, dragging Assklown I I I to the mat.
Assklown I I I tries to free his leg and advance position but Kuznetsov is retaining full guard.
Kuznetsov wants to sweep here but Assklown I I I controlling him for the moment. #SUB#
Kuznetsov throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.
Kuznetsov is breathing heavily.
Assklown I I I slows down the pace of the fight, as he sits in guard.
Kuznetsov is adopting a defensive guard.
Assklown I I I really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Kuznetsov. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.#T3#
Kuznetsov is looking to get back to his feet but can't, whilst Assklown I I I is controlling him.
Assklown I I I wants to control from the top but Kuznetsov keeps moving. #REF3#
The referee has motioned to the fighters to stand back up. He just wasn't happy with the level of activity.
Kuznetsov fakes high and shoots in for a takedown but Assklown I I I avoids it really well and circles away.#T4#
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Assklown I I I tries a head kick but it misses.
It appears Kuznetsov was looking to counter with a kick there.
Kuznetsov shoots in but Assklown I I I avoids the takedown attempt easily.#TD2#
Kuznetsov tries to sprawl but Assklown I I I drives through with a takedown into half guard.#ES#
Kuznetsov pushes Assklown I I I off and gets back to his feet.
Assklown I I I changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Kuznetsov tries to avoid it but Assklown I I I manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Kuznetsov to the ground. Kuznetsov escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Kuznetsov half committed to a counter leg kick.
Kuznetsov fails miserably with a takedown attempt.
Assklown I I I tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
No luck for Assklown I I I with that takedown attempt.
Assklown I I I shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Kuznetsov pinned against the cage. Kuznetsov gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Yuri Kuznetsov dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.
#R2#
Assklown I I I falls off balance throwing a combination
#CL#
and Kuznetsov counters by moving into the clinch.
Kuznetsov is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Assklown I I I can do to turn this around?
Kuznetsov letting Assklown I I I take a breather here.#BC2#
Assklown I I I breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Assklown I I I shoots in for a takedown but Kuznetsov shows good takedown defense.
Assklown I I I closes this distance looking for a takedown but Kuznetsov circles away.
Assklown I I I misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.
Yuri Kuznetsov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Benji Assklown I I I.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.#CL#
Assklown I I I gets tackled into the cage by Kuznetsov. Kuznetsov maintains the clinch.
Kuznetsov is trying to drag Assklown I I I to the mat but Assklown I I I just about manages to keep his footing. He used the cage to his advantage there.
Assklown I I I is working on a leg, looking for a takedown but Kuznetsov is defending well.#T1##TD2#
Assklown I I I pulls guard effortlessly. #SUB2#
Assklown I I I looks to be working for a triangle here. Oh, it looks like he might have it! Kuznetsov has picked Assklown I I I up and slammed him! Assklown I I I can't keep hold of the triangle and Kuznetsov manages to pass to side control!
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Assklown I I I is trying to control Kuznetsov's posture but Kuznetsov avoids it.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Kuznetsov remains in side control and seems content to stay there. It's a versatile position from which he can work both strikes and submissions, whilst maintaining that control, so maybe he'll sit here for a while.
Assklown I I I avoids any damage from the ground and pound of Kuznetsov. #T2#
Kuznetsov postures up a little and throws a couple of hammerfists but they don't connect properly.
Kuznetsov advances to mount. #SUB#
Kuznetsov is going oldschool here, as he tries to force Assklown I I I to tap using a forearm choke. This isn't 1993 though, so Assklown I I I shrugs it off.
Poor strikes thrown by Kuznetsov there. More accuracy and less frantic strikes would help!
Assklown I I I is wriggling around trying to escape.
Kuznetsov throws some wild stikes that Assklown I I I manages to avoid easily.
#SUB#
Kuznetsov has control of Assklown I I I's right arm, working for a kimura. It's a bit of a token attempt though and Assklown I I I regains control of the situation pretty easily.
Assklown I I I is writhing around trying to get back to his feet. #T3#
Kuznetsov content just to control the position here.
Assklown I I I working to try and regain half guard.
Kuznetsov wants to control the pace but Assklown I I I is squirming around nicely. #T4#
The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight.
Assklown I I I keeping his composure momentarily, calmly looking to get back to half guard.
Yuri Kuznetsov overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Kuznetsov throwing sloppy strikes here. Perhaps if he tightened up his striking from such a dominant position, he'd be able to finish easier.
Kuznetsov punching from mount but Assklown I I I doing a good job of avoiding damage.
Kuznetsov looking to control but Assklown I I I is working nicely, looking to advance position himself.
Kuznetsov thowing shots but they're missing.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Assklown I I I is squirming around, avoiding Kuznetsov's attempts to control the action.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Yuri Kuznetsov dominated that second round.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! This is the final round!
#R3#
Kuznetsov takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Assklown I I I shoots in looking for a takedown but Kuznetsov manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Assklown I I I's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
It looked like Kuznetsov was looking amped, ready to throw a big counter but didn't commit.
Kuznetsov fakes high and shoots in for a takedown but Assklown I I I avoids it really well and circles away.
Assklown I I I fails with an attempt to clinch.
#CL2#
Assklown I I I has Kuznetsov up against the cage in a clinch.
Assklown I I I is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables Kuznetsov to keep the fight standing.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Assklown I I I is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables Kuznetsov to keep the fight standing.
Yuri Kuznetsov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Benji Assklown I I I.
Kuznetsov trying to land knees to the body.
Kuznetsov will no doubt start fighting again in a minute but for now he's just having a little rest, leaning Assklown I I I up against the cage.#T1##TD#
Kuznetsov has managed to pull guard. Let's see whether he can work an aggressive guard. It will also be interesting to see what tactics Assklown I I I uses from the top position. #SUB#
Kuznetsov has a loose triangle. He'll be looking to tighten that up but Assklown I I I can see exactly what he's planning and manages to posture up and free himself.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Assklown I I I trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet. #SUB#
Kuznetsov is active off his back here, looking for submissions.
Kuznetsov lands a beautiful sweep and he's now moved into his opponent's guard.#REVR#
Assklown I I I is striking but Kuznetsov is not phased and passes to half guard.#T2#
Assklown I I I is looking for a sweep. Kuznetsov is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
Assklown I I I is trying to escape back to his feet but Kuznetsov uses the scramble to pass into side control.
Assklown I I I sneaks back into half guard.#SUB#
Kuznetsov looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.
Assklown I I I is trying to control but Kuznetsov manages to pass to mount!
#T3#
Assklown I I I tries to improve his position but instead Kuznetsov has taken his back! #SUB#
Kuznetsov has his opponent's back and is working for the choke.
Kuznetsov has the hooks in. Assklown I I I is trying to push off one leg but he has to do so cautiously to avoid being submitted. #T4#
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.#SUB#
Kuznetsov is remaining active here, looking for the choke. The more discerning members of the crowd will appreciate his efforts.
Assklown I I I tries to escape the position.
Kuznetsov not allowing Assklown I I I to control his hands.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Assklown I I I rolls, trying to escape but Kuznetsov keeps control of the position.
Benji Assklown I I I has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Yuri Kuznetsov is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
And that's the end of the fight!
Yuri Kuznetsov showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Kuznetsov has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Cecil Peabody scores the fight 30:27
Judge Robert Twigg scores the fight 30:27
Judge Wesley Smith scores the fight 30:27
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Yuri Kuznetsov!
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