PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Lester Burnham (ranked 6344 p4p, 3425 weight class) and Long Schlong (ranked 438 p4p, 318 weight class). Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Burnham
vs
Schlong

170 cm
31
145
16 - 14 - 0

178 cm
32
148
12 - 14 - 1

Abu Dhabi Champ
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Olympic wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 16 - 14 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Lester Burnham!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 12 - 14 - 1, fighting out of Las Vegas, Long Schlong!
The judges for this bout are Percy O'Donnell, Jack Bonds and Don Winkell.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Burnham forces Schlong back against the cage and clinches.
Schlong cracks Burnham with a nice body shot.
Schlong is stalling here.
A shot in the inside from Schlong.
Schlong is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.
Schlong stops a takedown attempt from Burnham.
Burnham drops down for a takedown but doesn't get it.
Burnham goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
We can't be sure of the tactics at this early stage but we have heard that Schlong has been working on his takedowns a lot in the buildup to the fight and we can only assume he's going to look to take this to the mat.
The two fighters are working to gain dominance in the clinch.
Schlong prevents a body shot from Burnham.
Burnham misses with a body punch.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Schlong.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Burnham changes levels and goes for a takedown here. Schlong fights it off and pushes away nicely.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Lester Burnham. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Good standup being displayed there by Schlong as he connects with a hook.
A low kick lands for Burnham.
Schlong paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
Burnham catches Schlong with a nice straight right. He seems pissed - ooooh, it's on now! On like donkey kong!

That's one minute gone in the round.
Burnham has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Schlong finds it's way round the side to connect with Burnham's head.
Burnham on the wrong end of a nice hook.
Burnham throws a sloppy head kick
and Schlong counters with a nice body shot.
Schlong thuds a left hand into Burnham's body.
Burnham scores with a nice body kick.
Both fighters circling a little - Burnham finishes the exchange with a kick to the body.
Burnham comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.

Burnham instigates a clinch.
Schlong lands a right hand.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Burnham goes for a takedown attempt but Schlong pushes him away and we're back to fighting at a distance.
A combination from Schlong does no damage.
Burnham throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Schlong throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.

Burnham closes the distance and gets a trip takedown into side control. Schlong quickly recovers to half guard.
Schlong is looking to improve his position.
Schlong tries to regain full guard. Instead though, Burnham has advanced to mount. Uh oh.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Burnham prevents Schlong from getting the reversal.
Schlong is squirming around, avoiding Burnham's attempts to control the action.
Schlong bucks up and manages to get a nice reversal! He's in guard on the top - nicely done!
Schlong trying to control the position from guard on top but Burnham is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Schlong passes Burnham's left leg - he's now in half guard.
Schlong is controlling the pace.

Schlong is working for a submission of some sort.
Schlong trying to control from half guard but Burnham is working away.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Burnham tries to get to full guard but Schlong has control of the leg.
Schlong takes a deep breath and rests his weight momentarily on top of his opponent, to control the position.
Schlong tries to pass to full mount but Burnham defends it.
Schlong passes to side control.
Schlong trying to control the position but Burnham is working away.
Burnham struggling a bit here.

Schlong tries for a kimura. Not really close to a finish though.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Long Schlong will probably get the nod.
That's time! Burnham's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Burnham gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.
Burnham is looking to take this one to the mat.
Schlong tries to stall but Burnham uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Schlong lands an uppercut.

Burnham works for the underhooks and manages to get a trip takedown into guard.
Schlong looking to control.
Burnham tries to free his leg and advance position but Schlong is retaining full guard.
Schlong keeping moving, preventing Burnham from controlling successfully.
Burnham tries to free his leg and advance position but Schlong is retaining full guard.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Schlong is trying to keep Burnham in close.
Schlong wants to sweep but no luck.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Schlong is doing well to control the posture of his opponent and prevent any damage.
If this pace continues, the referee will definitely step in and force a standup.
Lester Burnham overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Schlong is trying to control the position from the bottom.
Schlong is pulling down on Burnham's head. It's preventing any offense from Burnham, at least for the moment.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up.
Burnham lands a leg kick that knocks Schlong off balance momentarily.
Schlong avoids the head kick by Burnham.
Burnham walks into a stiff left hand from Schlong.
Burnham lets the fists fly and connects with a left straight followed by a right hook.
Schlong throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Burnham sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Schlong feints a straight left to the body, then turns around with a flashy move and hits Burnhams jaw with a dramatic spinning back fist!
Burnham blocks a leg kick.
Burnham displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Schlong throws out the jab.
Burnham was looking to counter that last move with a shot to the body but he didn't commit.
Burnham fakes the leg kick and cracks Schlong in the body.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Schlong looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
A chopping leg kick lands by Schlong.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Schlong scores with a hook.
Burnham throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Schlong looks to land a right hand but Burnham moved out of range.
Burnham fires out a quick counter leg kick but Schlong just manages to avoid it.
Burnham avoids the body shot from Schlong.
Burnham just misses with a punch to the body.
Schlong works the jab nicely.
A looping hook to the body misses from Schlong. Burnham does a little dance to reset his feet.
Schlong checks a low kick from Burnham.
Schlong has used his reach advantage pretty well so far tonight.
Schlong cracks Burnham with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage.
Schlong cracks Burnham with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
Schlong throws a series of punches but Burnham avoids them all with ease.
Schlong misses the shot to the body.
Burnham scores with a jab to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Burnham takes a hook to the side of the head. I wonder if that's got his ears ringing.
Burnham moves in looking to clinch but Schlong pushes him off.
A shot to the liver by Schlong. Beautiful body shot.
Schlong shoots in for a takedown but doesn't get it.
Schlong looks to score with a jab to the body but Burnham is just out of range.
Schlong uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Schlong misses with a wild body shot.
Schlong connects with a right hand. Burnham shakes it off.
A looping hook to the body misses from Burnham. Schlong does a little dance to reset his feet.
Burnham tries to clinch up.
Burnham uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Schlong.
As Schlong backs away, Burnham returns fire with a leg kick that just misses.
Burnham ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.
Schlong shoots in for a takedown. "Ole!" shouts Burnham as he jumps to the side.
Burnham tries a head kick but it misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Burnham fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Schlong.
Burnham ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Schlong moves away.
Long Schlong seems to be getting the better of the standup.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Burnham ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Schlong moves away.
Burnham lands a nice shot to the body.
Burnham seems to be moving with more speed, compared to his last bout. He must have been working on that in the gym.
Schlong scores with a decent looking hook.
Burnham takes a swing at Schlong's ribcage but misses.
Schlong misses with a straight left.
Schlong will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
Burnham swung with a counter punch to the body but it didn't connect.
Schlong tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Schlong throws a hook but Burnham blocks it.
Burnham takes one on the button.
Burnham scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Burnham throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Schlong drops down looking to force a counter takedown but Burnham defends it well.
Jab from Schlong.
Schlong chopping away at his opponent's legs.
Schlong throws a series of punches but Burnham avoids them all with ease.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Long Schlong will probably get the nod - 10:9.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare each other down, ready to get back to the action. This is the final round!

A jab from Schlong does it's job there.
Schlong misses with a body shot.
A leg kick checked by Schlong.
Burnham uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Schlong throws a jab when Burnham was well out of range.
Schlong looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Burnham missing with a left hand there. Schlong was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Burnham uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Schlong has time to react.
Schlong just misses with a punch to the body.
A cross from Burnham lands.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from Burnham.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Burnham tries to close the distance and clinch up but Schlong swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Burnham throws a quick inside leg kick.
Burnham walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. Schlong checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
Schlong on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
Schlong swings and misses with a hook to the body.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Schlong jabs Burnham right on the nose. Burnham blinks but takes it well.
Schlong misses with a straight right.
Burnham tries to counter by moving into the clinch but Schlong manages to circle out of the way.
Burnham throws out a leg kick but Schlong moves out of range and Burnham only half commits.
Schlong throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Burnham.
Schlong ducks under a wild hook from Burnham.
Schlong moves out of range of the body kick from Burnham.

Burnham clinches.
Burnham tries a body shot but Schlong blocks it.
Burnham is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.
Some stalling of biblical proportions here from Schlong.
Schlong misses with a hook to the ribs.
Schlong throws a punch but it's blocked by Burnham.
Schlong content to slow the pace in the clinch.
Schlong misses with a body punch.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Burnham.
Burnham lands with a light punch inside.
Lester Burnham has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Long Schlong is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A right hook to the body lands for Burnham.
Burnham is working for takedown but Schlong is calmly controlling the position for now.
Schlong is trying to maintain a safe position but Burnham gets an underhook and turns Schlong into the cage.
Burnham misses with a body punch.
Schlong tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Schlong misses with a short punch on the inside.
Schlong tries to work over Burnham's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Burnham blocks an uppercut.
Schlong lands a right hand that snaps the head of Burnham backwards.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
The fighters are pressed against the cage, as the pace of the fight slows.
Burnham prevents a takedown attempt there.
Schlong tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Schlong throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Burnhams head.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Schlong doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Burnham leaning his opponent against the cage.
Schlong has a couple of punches blocked by Burnham.
Schlong lands with a left to the head.
Schlong leaning against his opponent.
Schlong doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Schlong is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Burnham is keeping busy.
A short right from Schlong.
Burnham doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Schlong manages to get underhooks and slows down the pace for a moment.
Burnham tries to pull guard but Schlong holds him up against the cage and eventually Burnham drops back down to his feet.
Schlong is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Schlong throws a head punch that misses.
Good body shot from Schlong.
Burnham is struggling to control the position.

Burnham gets control of Schlong's arms and successfully pulls guard. Burnham will no doubt be looking for submissions off his back.
Burnham keeping moving, preventing Schlong from controlling successfully.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Burnham working a defensive guard but Schlong passes into half guard.
Burnham wants to get back to full guard.

Burnham is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but Schlong pulls his head out easily.
Schlong is just content to waste time from the top position. Burnham takes advantage of the situation and regains full guard.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Burnham being controlled here, momentarily.

And that's the end of the fight!
I would just about give that final round to Long Schlong.
I've got Schlong winning every round here. Surely the decision will go his way and he'll pick up a well deserved decision victory. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Percy O'Donnell scores the fight 27:30
Judge Jack Bonds scores the fight 27:30
Judge Don Winkell scores the fight 27:30

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Long Schlong!