PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Thad Thayer (ranked 2960 p4p, 22189 weight class) and Chubby Noel (ranked 121 p4p, 255 weight class). Noel has chosen the fat boys fat boys as his entrance music. I'm sure you'll be fascinated to know that I was talking to some pointless Z list celebrity before the fight and he thought that Chubby Noel was going to win. Let's see if he was right.

Thayer
vs
Noel

165 cm
36
134
6 - 7 - 0

198 cm
47
215
30 - 41 - 1

Powerful takedowns
Lethal high kicks
Insanely flexible

BJJ Purple Belt
Decent boxing
Heavy handed

Helsinki Xtreme Fightwear
Vegan Gains

Vegan Gains

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 6 - 7 - 0, fighting out of New York, Thad Thayer!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 30 - 41 - 1, fighting out of New York, Chubby Noel!
The judges for this bout are Taro Takaoka, Shigeki Sano and Shirou Masuda.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
A telegraphed right hand from Noel misses the target.
Noel misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Thayer.
Noel throws a head kick that misses.
Noel throws a body punch but Thayer moves out of range.
Noel misses with a body punch
and Noel takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Danga de danga de dang - Noel scores with a four punch combination!

It looks like Thad Thayer has been cut.
Noel takes a head kick and shrugs it off.
Noel's jab looks to have found its range, popping Thayer under the eye.
Thayer defending well as Noel loads up on a big left hand.

Thayer has taken the fight to the clinch.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Noel misses with the head strike.

Thayer manages to break the clinch.
Noel misses with a hook to the body
and Thayer counters with a big head kick but Noel shrugs it off.
Noel rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Thayer counters with a two punch combo.
Thayer bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
A big right from Noel misses.
Thayer is trying to close the distance and clinch up, after that failed offence from Noel.

Noel gets caught on his heels momentarily as he allows Thayer to score an easy takedown into full guard.
Noel is wriggling around but Thayer manages to pass to half guard.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Thayer not doing much here.
Thayer not throwing his punches with enough precision this time.
Thayer thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Thayer trying to mount his opponent but Noel defends it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Well. There's a bit of a lull in the action here and the crowd are starting to get restless.
Neither fighter is being very active at the moment, with Thayer in particular looking to stall.

Thayer is looking for a kimura here.
Thayer content to sit in half guard and control for a moment.
Thayer missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thayer not doing much here.
Thayer thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Thayer takes a deep breath and rests his weight momentarily on top of his opponent, to control the position.
Thayer thumps the canvas. Not on purpose obviously - he just missed Noel's head.
Thayer works his way into full mount!
Noel blocking the ground and pound.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Noel manages to work a leg through to get back to half guard here. Good work there by Noel, under a barage of strikes from Thayer.
Thayer is figuring out what he wants to do next.
Noel keeping his head moving to avoid the ground and pound.
Thayer takes a deep breath and rests his weight momentarily on top of his opponent, to control the position.

Thayer decides to return to a standing position.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

Thad Thayer dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Thad Thayer's cut.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

Thayer slips under a jab from Noel.
Noel misses with a jab to the body
and Thayer cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Thayer displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Noel throws out the jab.
Noel fails to land with a series of punches.
Noel throws the left hand but Thayer avoids the punch easily.

Thayer closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage.
Noel tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Noel lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Noel tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thayer.
Thayer blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Noel has a couple of punches blocked by Thayer.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.

Thayer ties up his opponent against the cage and manages to drag the fight down to the ground. Thayer no doubt will be looking to work submissions from his guard.
Noel really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Thayer. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
Thayer is working the butterfly guard. He manages to land a nice scissor sweep and is now in half guard on the top. Nice move.

Thayer is taking a breather. Noel says something to him but it's hard to make out. Perhaps he's telling him to get on with it and actually do something.
Thayer is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Noel can do to turn this around?

That's one minute gone in the round.

Thayer is looking for a kimura. It's going to be difficult to finish that from half guard though and Noel defends it well.
Thayer sitting and controlling from the half guard.
Noel wants to control the action here but instead Thayer manages to pass to full mount!
Thayer looks to be in better condition than last time we saw him fight. Obviously he's been working hard on his cardio.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight.
Thayer looking to finish with strikes here!

Thayer working for a guillotine from mount but Noel is in no mood to give up.

Thayer stands up from mount. Strange move.

The fight moves into the clinch position.
Noel misses with the head strike.
Noel tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Thayer's elbow.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Thayer has clasped his hands together around Noel's back... aaand, he's got a takedown into side control. Nicely done.
Thayer controlling the position.

Thayer tries for an arm triangle. That looks pretty tight to me. Is this one over!?! Possibly, maybe, no Thayer has let go of the choke. Obviously it wasn't as tight as we thought!
Noel is breathing heavily.
Noel is positioning himself to get back to half guard.

Thayer decides to stand back up.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Noel tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Thayer was well out of range. Poor timing from Noel.
Noel throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Thayer.
Thayer appears to be looking for a big counter.
Noel throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped

and Thayer counters with a shoot takedown into half guard.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Thayer performing his best blanket impression for a moment.
Thad Thayer overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Thayer seems to have a rather negative gameplan on the ground. He seems keen to just score the takedown and hold down Noel for as long as he can get away with.
Thayer has controlled the position for a good 20 seconds, which will no doubt be starting to frustrate his opponent.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

Thad Thayer dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Thad Thayer's cut.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare each other down, ready to get back to the action. Let's hear some noise people - this is the final round!

Noel throws out a loose jab but Thayer uses good head movement to avoid it.

Noel tries to sprawl but Thayer drives through with a takedown into half guard.
Noel tries to push off, looking to stand up, but Thayer manages to move to mount!
Thayer controlling the position easily from mount.
Thayer punching from mount but Noel doing a good job of avoiding damage.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thayer controlling from mount.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thayer looking to ground and pound but Noel is blocking nicely.
Thayer punching from mount but Noel doing a good job of avoiding damage.
Thayer controlling the pace for now.
Noel has given up his back here.
Noel is in a world of trouble here. He's outmatched on the ground here and he'd better get Thayer off his back sharpish unless he wants to be submitted.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
You know, I was talking to some of our celebrities at ringside tonight and they were split right down the middle on who was going to win this fight.
This is a sustained period of stalling by Thayer.
Noel takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

Thayer is working really hard to secure the rear naked choke. Noel defends successfully for a significant amount of time. Both fighters are looking very determined.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thayer has the hooks sunk in and you can see the will to fight slowly draining out of Noel's body.
Chubby Noel has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

Thayer tightening his grip on Noel, looking for the choke.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
My god... these two guys really need to pick up the pace or everyone will leave to go get a beer.
Thayer throwing lazy shots from the back mount that aren't doing any damage.

Thayer looking to break Noel's wrist control so he can sink in the choke. Noel remaining controlled and patient though - he really has to keep calm otherwise Thayer will wrap this one up with the rear naked choke!
Thayer controlling from the back.
Thad Thayer is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Thayer missing with punches from the back.

And that's the end of the fight!
Thad Thayer showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Thayer, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Taro Takaoka scores the fight 30:27
Judge Shigeki Sano scores the fight 30:27
Judge Shirou Masuda scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Thad Thayer!