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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Ass Turd (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Bubba Sparks (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Fingers crossed for an exciting fight - I'm sure both fighters are looking for a nice under the table bonus!
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150 cm
22
300 lbs
0 - 0 - 0 |
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225 cm
23
300 lbs
3 - 1 - 0 |
BJJ Blue Belt
Brawler
Intelligent |
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BJJ Blue Belt
Basic striking
Very confident |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division. Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner. With a record of
0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Ass Turd ! And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner. With a record of
3 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Bubba Sparks! The judges for this bout are Anni Minnemäki, Matti Vanhoillinen and Roosa Järviläinen.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway! Turd shoots in and bounces Sparks off the cage to secure the takedown into guard. Sparks throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.
Turd really is a fat lump. Turd wanted to stand there but Sparks had control of the position. Sparks escapes his hips to the side and looks to be working for an armbar. Turd gives him a little smile and shakes his head. No chance. Turd wants to control from the top but Sparks keeps moving. Sparks looking to hit a scissor sweep but Turd is one step ahead there. Sparks is persisting with the attempt to improve his position. Turd trying to control but Sparks is working from the bottom.
That's one minute gone in the round. Turd wants to pass the guard but Sparks is keeping the position. The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing. Sparks is looking for a triangle but Turd pushes his legs off easily.
Sparks throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.
Sparks looks gassed! Turd wants to get up but he can't break Sparks's closed guard. He needs to be careful trying to break the legs open, as he's open to submissions here. Turd wants to control from the top but Sparks keeps moving. The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work. Turd chips away with some ground and pound. Turd has to be careful here, sitting in the guard of a superior BJJ player. Sparks looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Turd wants to control from the top but Sparks keeps moving. Sparks is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Turd stopping the sweep attempt from Sparks. Turd is stalling in the full guard. Turd tries to free his leg and advance position but Sparks is retaining full guard. Turd drops back looking for a leg! Sparks is in trouble here! The fighters roll with the hold and Sparks manages to kick Turd off! Turd jumps back into Sparks's guard. Sparks working from the bottom, still in full guard. He's managed to get a loose triangle. Turd doesn't seem to be doing much to defend here, obviously he feels comfortable in the position. Turd manages to throw the legs off his shoulder and he's back into guard - no problem. Turd stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Sparks swivels though and keeps the full guard.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Sparks looking for submissions from the bottom here. Moving his hips around, possibly looking for an armbar.
Turd trying to control the position from guard on top but Sparks is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can. Sparks keeping full guard, as Turd tries to pass. Sparks is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle. Sparks escapes his hips to the side and looks to be working for an armbar. Turd gives him a little smile and shakes his head. No chance. Turd seems content to control from guard here. He's going to have to remain active though if he doesn't want to get stood back up.
That's four minutes gone in the round. A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace. Sparks looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Sparks is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive. Turd has decided he wants to stand but the closed guard of Sparks is proving hard to escape from.
The referee decides to stand the fighters back up. Turd drives through with a really nice takedown into side control. Sparks is looking for a sweep. Turd decides to stand up, so the ref orders Sparks to his feet. Turd fails with a takedown attempt from distance. Sparks misses with a takedown and Turd counters by moving into the clinch. Good anticipation by Turd . Turd drops down for a takedown but doesn't get it.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
That was a close round but I would say that Ass Turd will probably get the nod. That's time! Turd 's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.
Sparks fails with the takedown and Turd counters with a driving takedown into guard. Nice work there by Turd . Turd drops back for a leg! It's a sloppy attempt though and Turd jumps back into guard quickly, to retain the dominant position. Turd trying to control but Sparks is working from the bottom. Sparks has his foot on Turd 's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Turd works his way back into a safe position though. Sparks has a loose triangle. He'll be looking to tighten that up but Turd can see exactly what he's planning and manages to posture up and free himself. Turd trying to control but Sparks is working from the bottom. Sparks lands a beautiful switch and he's in full mount! That could spell trouble for Turd ! This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Sparks looks like he's working for a submission but he's not found anything just yet. Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
That's one minute gone in the round. Sparks jumps to the side looking to secure the arm triangle…. Ooooh, that looks tight… Turd is gargling but he's managed to escape! Nice work there by Turd and Sparks has given up the dominant position trying to land that submission.
Turd regains half guard. Sparks is looking for a kimura but Turd is holding onto that half guard position, so it's hard for Sparks to get the leverage. Turd looking for submissions from an awkward position here. Sparks seems to be working for a kimura but Turd defends the submission attempt. Turd is trying to stand up here but Sparks is controlling him well. Turd is looking to sinch up a gullotine here but Sparks pulls his head out easily.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Sparks is trying a forearm choke… I don't think that's going to do much at this level of the game.
Sparks is working for a submission of some sort.
Turd wants to control but Sparks is keeping busy.
Sparks is trying to work for a kimura. He's got his hands clasped together - this could be trouble! No, Turd has managed to free his arm - good work. Turd trying to control here.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Turd looking for submissions from an awkward position here. Turd tries to get to full guard but Sparks has control of the leg. Turd tries to kick Sparks off but Sparks keeps his base steady and stays in half guard. Turd trying to control but Sparks postures up.
Sparks is looking for an arm triangle, whilst trying to pass to side control. Turd doesn't seem that keen to cooperate though. No luck this time Sparks. Turd might be looking to lock onto one of his opponent's long limbs for a submission, whilst we're on the ground. Sparks is looking for a kimura here.
Sparks wants to work for an arm triangle but Turd is really keeping half guard well and defending the submission attempt.
That's four minutes gone in the round. The crowd are starting to boo a lack of action. Turd wants to control but Sparks is keeping busy.
Turd tries to get to full guard but Sparks has control of the leg. Sparks is looking for a kimura. It's going to be difficult to finish that from half guard though and Turd defends it well. Sparks is looking for a kimura here.
Sparks is looking for a kimura but he's never going to get it from there. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
A close second round but Bubba Sparks will probably get the nod - 10:9. That's time! Turd 's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. Let's get this one finished - here comes the final round!
Turd drops down and drives through with a powerful takedown into guard. Sparks wants to sweep but no luck. Turd trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet. Sparks wants to sweep but no luck. Turd is taking a break and basically stalling. The referee will not allow him to do that for long. Sparks is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle. Turd stands up and waves to Sparks to follow him. Sparks shoots in but doesn't get the takedown and Turd holds on and brings the fighters into a clinch. Sparks lands a nice trip takedown into half guard.
Turd makes his way to full guard. A much better position for Turd . Both fighters are breathing heavily.
That's one minute gone in the round. Sparks preventing the sweep. Turd has his foot on Sparks's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Sparks works his way back into a safe position though. Sparks works a leg free and moves into half guard. Turd flails away from the bottom but he's not doing any damage.
Sparks is working for submissions here but there's nothing on.
Sparks has hold of the far side arm. He's working for the Kimura, can Turd defend it? Sparks steps over the head and cranks it - Turd is tapping out! That was textbook stuff right there - nice submission victory for Sparks!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:31 of round 3, we have a winner by way of Submission (Kimura). Bubba Sparks!
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S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
100% |
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