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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a middleweight MMA rules bout between Emelia Kooldfish (ranked 2936 p4p, 5234 weight class) and Melatonin Mitch (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Kooldfish comes to the cage accompanied by Dirty Needle Project! by Tom MacDonald & Adam Calhoun. I'm sure you'll be fascinated to know that I was talking to some pointless Z list celebrity before the fight and he thought that Melatonin Mitch was going to win. Let's see if he was right.
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| 189 cm
26
190
5 - 1 - 0 |
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190 cm
25
190
0 - 2 - 0 |
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Cardio machine |
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BJJ White Belt
Good kicks
Intelligent |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the middleweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 5 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Emelia Kooldfish!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 2 - 0, fighting out of London, Melatonin Mitch!
The judges for this bout are Cecil Peabody, Tiny Johnson and Stewart Dunkirk.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Mitch throws a lazy body kick
and Kooldfish counters into the clinch. Nicely done.
Kooldfish lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Kooldfish pressing his opponent against the cage.
Kooldfish is struggling to control the position.
The pace slowing considerably in the clinch, as Kooldfish takes a break from that fighting nonsense to think about the finer things in life.
Kooldfish lands with a light punch inside.
Kooldfish lands an uppercut.
Mitch throws a head punch that misses.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Kooldfish scores with a nice hook to the head.
Mitch is rocked!
Kooldfish dips a shoulder and cracks Mitch with a mighty uppercut! Mitch falls back against the cage and Kooldfish unloads with a barrage of strikes! Mitch is completely out with his eyes open, only supported by the cage! Save him ref! Eventually the ref decides to do his job and jumps in - Kooldfish screams abuse at the incompetent official before going over to celebrate with his corner. Brutal stuff!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:53 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Emelia Kooldfish!
Emelia Kooldfish took some time post fight to say the following; 'I'm so unselfish and so virtuous that I want to dedicate this fight to someone not white. Because I AM A GOOD PERSON DONT YOU GET IT?!!!! And yeah, like, Love will save us all, except certain pigments I guess. I think that's what one of my gofundme investers said.'.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
70% |
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