PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Your Mom (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Xander Cage (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Mom comes to the cage accompanied by Ameno by ERA. Your Mom has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?

Mom
vs
Cage

215 cm
18
277 lbs
1 - 0 - 0

191 cm
22
262 lbs
2 - 4 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Granite chin

Dangerous GnP
Excellent boxer
Tends to cut

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Your Mom!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 2 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Xander Cage!
The judges for this bout are , and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Mom drops Cage with a hook right on the temple. He thinks about going to the ground but Cage looks back up at him and smiles so Mom waves him back to his feet - he obviously thinks he can knock him out after that shot landed.

Cage is rocked!

It looks like Xander Cage has been cut.
Cage slips a jab and a cross from Mom.
Cage is still on wobbly legs! Can Mom finish him?
Mom throws a right and a left that Cage avoids nicely.
Cage should think about turning a few of those tyres round his middle into muscle if he wants people to take him seriously as an athlete.
Nice sprawl there from Mom as Cage shoots in.
Cage seems to have recovered his senses.
Mom lands with a jab that stuns his opponent. Cage is looking to close the distance but Mom sees it coming and throws a beautiful knee! Cage crumbles to the mat and that's all she wrote! Let's hope Cage is OK because that was naaaaaasty!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:12 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Knee). Your Mom!