PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Crouch Ouch (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Aggravated Battery (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Battery is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by Wife Beater. There are an array of beautiful celebrities at ringside tonight! I wonder if any of them paid for their tickets.

Ouch
vs
Battery

203 cm
24
285 lbs
5 - 2 - 0

192 cm
21
260 lbs
7 - 2 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Good knees
KO power

Powerful takedowns
Counter striker
Granite chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 5 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Crouch Ouch!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 7 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Aggravated Battery!
The judges for this bout are Alyssa Summers, Columbo Gatti and Chad Campbell.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Battery tries to clinch up.
Ouch swats away the attempt to clinch by Battery.
Battery tries to clinch up but Ouch circles away and keeps his distance.
Nice sprawl there from Ouch as Battery shoots in.
A telegraphed takedown attempt from Battery is defended easily by Ouch.
A combination from Ouch does no damage.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Battery keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Ouch.
Battery closes the distance and clinches up with Ouch, looking for a takedown. Battery pushes Ouch against the cage but Ouch circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Crouch Ouch has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Aggravated Battery.

Battery tries to keep at a distance but Ouch has taken the fight into the clinch.
Knees to the body from Ouch.
Battery looks gassed!

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ouch lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!

It looks like Aggravated Battery has been cut.
Ouch gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
Ouch unloads a knee to the mid-section. Battery lets out a prehistoric sounding urrrrgh.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Ouch creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Ouch tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Ouch scores a nice knee to the body.
Ouch lands a knee to the head.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Ouch.
Ouch lands a nice uppercut.
Ouch looking to throw knees to the head but Battery is blocking nicely.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Ouch obliges.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Ouch lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Battery or not.
Ouch connects with a nasty looking knee right to Battery's face.
Battery is looking for a takedown up against the cage. Ouch gets underhooks though and prevents the takedown attempt.
Ouch landing knees to the body. They look like they could hurt.
Ouch lands an elbow that stopped Battery in his tracks for a moment.
A knee to the head by Ouch.
A knee to the head by Ouch.
Ouch lands a shot to the body.
Ouch scores with a shoulder strike.
Battery changes levels and goes for a takedown here. Ouch fights it off and pushes away nicely.
Ouch catches Battery with a nice straight right. He seems pissed - ooooh, it's on now! On like donkey kong!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ouch bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Battery's head backwards.
Battery moves out of range as Ouch strikes.
Ouch scores with a sloppy right hand. Battery should have avoided that one.
Nice takedown defense from Ouch. No joy for Battery on that attempt.
Battery closes this distance looking for a takedown but Ouch circles away.
Ouch works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.

That has opened up Aggravated Battery's cut even more.

Ouch closes the distance and clinches.
Battery tries to take the fight to the ground by pulling guard but can't manage it.
Ouch gets underhooks to prevent Battery's takedown attempt.
Ouch working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Ouch landing knees to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ouch lands a nice elbow.
Ouch lands a knee to the head.

The cut above Aggravated Battery's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
Battery takes an elbow to the temple.
Battery takes a knee right on the jaw!
Ouch landing knees to the head.
Ouch unloads a knee to the mid-section.
Ouch landing knees to the body.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Ouch obliges.
Ouch using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Battery has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Ouch utilising his Muay Thai to score with a knee to the body.
Battery pushes off and fires off an elbow that misses, before clinching up again, against the cage.
Ouch tries to land a knee to the head but Battery blocks with his arms.
Battery tries a knee to the head but Ouch blocks it.
Ouch keeps control of Battery as he tries to wriggle out of the double underhooks.
Ouch gets underhooks to prevent Battery's takedown attempt.
Battery jumps guard but Ouch stands there with Battery around his waist. Battery gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Battery drops down for a takedown but doesn't get it.
Ouch lands a nice elbow.
Ouch unloads a knee to the mid-section.
Ouch working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Ouch stops a takedown attempt from Battery.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A short left from Ouch.
Ouch scores with a nice hook to the head.
Battery can't get the takedown.
A right handed body shot lands from Ouch.
Ouch with a knee to the head.
A shot in the inside from Ouch.

Battery gets a trip takedown into half guard.
Battery prevents Ouch from improving his position.

Ouch manages to escape and get back to his feet!
Ouch is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Ouch swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.

Battery closes the distance and looks for a trip takedown... aaaand he's got it - Battery lands in his opponent's guard.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Battery trying to control the position from guard on top but Ouch is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Ouch looking to hit a scissor sweep but Battery is one step ahead there.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Crouch Ouch dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Aggravated Battery's cut.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Battery has a takedown stuffed.
Ouch fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
Battery shoots for a double leg takedown but Ouch sprawls well. He's pushed Battery's face into the mat and manages to get back to his feet relatively easily.
Aggravated Battery is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Battery shoots for a takedown but Ouch saw that one coming a mile off and avoided it easily.
Crouch Ouch has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Aggravated Battery.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Ouch sizes up Battery with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
Battery steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Ouch.
Battery is breathing heavily.
Battery looks for a takedown here. Will he get it? Ouch is fending him off so far but Battery persists. Nope, Ouch circles away and we're back to standing.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Ouch rushes Battery and presses him up against the cage.
Ouch lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Ouch obliges.
Ouch landing some nice looking knees to the body.
Ouch throws a knee to the head but misses.
Ouch presses Battery against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
Ouch gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
Ouch looking to throw knees to the head but Battery is blocking nicely.
Crouch Ouch has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Ouch gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.

Aggravated Battery's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.
Ouch tries a knee to the head but Battery blocks it.
Ouch is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Ouch throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Battery blocks it with crossed arms.
Ouch prevents the takedown attempt.
Battery jumps guard but Ouch stands there with Battery around his waist. Battery gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Ouch is working Battery over against the cage.
Ouch is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Battery can do to turn this around?
Ouch lands a body punch - he's looking to wear down Battery.
Ouch is working Battery over against the cage.
Knees in the clinch landing for Ouch.
A body shot lands from Ouch.
Ouch lands a body shot.
Ouch tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Battery tries to score a body lock takedown but Ouch shows good agility there to stay on his feet.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ouch unloads a knee to the mid-section.
Battery wants a takedown.
Ouch tries to land knees in the clinch but Battery avoids the damage to the body.
Battery's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Battery drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Ouch gets the underhooks and prevents it.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Ouch throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Battery blocks it with crossed arms.
Ouch looking to throw knees to the head but Battery is blocking nicely.
Ouch is pressed up against the cage. Battery has hold of a leg and is looking to drag Ouch down to the mat. Ouch avoids the attempt though and has circled away. We're back to striking at a distance.
Battery takes one on the chin but seems OK.
Battery shoots in and drives through. Ouch sprawls well.
Ouch lands an overhand right.
Battery takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.
Battery fails with the takedown.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ouch scores with a nice right hand.
Ouch throws out a powerful jab.
Horrible takedown by Battery or perhaps it was just good defense by Ouch which made him look bad.
Battery takes a big uppercut there. He seems a bit wobbly but no, he's OK.
Battery tries to move into range but Ouch moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Aggravated Battery's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:53 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Crouch Ouch!