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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a bantamweight MMA rules bout between Muhammad Ali (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Silly Bollocks (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). There are an array of beautiful celebrities at ringside tonight! I wonder if any of them paid for their tickets.
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| 175 cm
22
134 lbs
1 - 2 - 0 |
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170 cm
18
135 lbs
4 - 4 - 0 |
BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Granite chin |
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Good takedowns
Brawler
Determined |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the bantamweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
1 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Muhammad Ali!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
4 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Silly Bollocks!
The judges for this bout are Ben Zyskovitsi, Johanna Lukiainen and Matti Vanhoillinen.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Donk. Ali catches Bollocks right on the button with a cross.
No joy there for Ali, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Bollocks takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
Bollocks fails with a takedown attempt.
Bollocks misses with a head kick.
Ali wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
Ali stuffs the takedown attempt from Bollocks. Bollocks gets slowly back to his feet.
Ali is looking to land body kicks.
Bollocks misses with a wild combination.
Bollocks shoots in and bounces Ali off the cage to secure the takedown into guard.
Bollocks trying to control but Ali is working from the bottom.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Ali pushes Bollocks off for just long enough to get back to his feet. Very athletic spring there.
Ali connects with the punch.
Ali misses with a two punch combination.
Bollocks fails with a takedown attempt.
Muhammad Ali has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Silly Bollocks.
Bollocks looks gassed!
Ali scores with a jab.
Ali bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Ali lands a jab. Then a cross. Then finally a nice hook to the body. Good work there by Ali.
Ali throws a low kick but Bollocks avoids it.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ali displaying good standup as he scores with a three punch combination.
Ali swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Ali really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
Bollocks dives in and grabs Ali's left leg, looking for a takedown. Ali pushes down on Bollocks's head and hops out.
Bollocks closes this distance looking for a takedown but Ali circles away.
Ali lands a jab. Then a cross. Then finally a nice hook to the body. Good work there by Ali.
Bollocks fakes high and shoots in for a takedown but Ali avoids it really well and circles away.
Ali lands with a nice combination. Bollocks backs away looking to recover.
Bollocks is rocked!
It looks like Silly Bollocks has been cut.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Ali throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Ali throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Ali!
Muhammad Ali is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Ali fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Ali avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Bollocks takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bollocks misses with a combination
and Ali counters with a left to the body.
Ali throws a two punch combo that lands nicely.
Ali lands a jab followed by a nice looking cross.
Ali lands with a cross.
Ali cracks Bollocks with a good jab.
Ali is moving around nicely and scores here with a single head shot.
Ali is really peppering his opponent's head with punches.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Ali!
Bollocks has his head slapped from side to side by a 3 punch combination. That must have hurt him.
A punch combination from Ali misses.
Muhammad Ali seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Ali will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Bollocks shoots and misses
and Ali counters with a nice uppercut.
Bollocks takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Bollocks moves his head to the side to avoid a jab but walks straight into a cross.
Ali misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Ali throws a nice looking combination but Bollocks bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Bollocks misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Ali ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.
Bollocks tries to clinch but Ali moves away
enabling Ali to counter with a crisp jab.
Bollocks finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
Ali swinging wilding here.
Bollocks slips a jab and a cross from Ali.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Bollocks closes the distance but Ali moves to the side
and Ali counters with a three punch combo that has Bollocks backing up. Bollocks nods at Ali to acknowledge the strikes.
Bollocks takes one to the side of the head.
Bollocks looks frustrated there after his takedown attempt is stuffed easily.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Muhammad Ali dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Silly Bollocks's cut.
That's time! Ali's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.
Bollocks tries for a takedown but Ali sees it coming a mile off and avoids it easily.
Bollocks has his head slapped from side to side by a 3 punch combination. That must have hurt him.
Ali lands a jab, followed by a cross and another cross, as Bollocks backs up against the cage.
Muhammad Ali is winning the standup battle so far.
Bollocks shoots in looking for a double leg takedown. Ali defends it nicely.
Ali moves into range and throws a lovely three punch combination.
Ali lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Ali scores with a jab to the body.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Ali throws a shot to the body.
Bollocks closes the distance and clinches up with Ali, looking for a takedown. Bollocks pushes Ali against the cage but Ali circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Muhammad Ali has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Silly Bollocks.
Ali lands a two punch combo.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Ali!
Ali will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
Ali throws a series of punches but Bollocks avoids them all with ease.
A nice combination there by Ali.
Ali digs a good hook to Bollocks's body.
A shot to de liver by Ali. Beautiful body shot.
Ali throws a one two combo.
Ali throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Ali throws a shot to the body.
Bollocks attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
Ali pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Bollocks shoots in for a takedown! He's got it and he's managed to land in full mount! That's better than Bollocks was expecting from the takedown attempt, I'm sure!
Ali wants to try and get back to his feet.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ali is bucking up trying to escape but Bollocks cracks him with another couple of good strikes.
Bollocks tries to control but Ali wriggling away.
Bollocks throws some wild stikes that Ali manages to avoid easily.
Bollocks scoring with strikes but Ali is staying in there.
Ali tries to buck Bollocks off but he can't manage it.
Bollocks with the ground and pound from mount.
Bollocks landing shots from mount.
Bollocks can't quite control the action as he would like just now, as Ali is looking to escape.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ali wriggling around on the bottom manages to avoid the strikes thrown by Bollocks.
You get the feeling that Ali really doesn't like being in this position too much.
Bollocks has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
Ali is trying to stand but he's just given Bollocks his back.
Bollocks keeps control of the position easily here as Ali tries to buck him off.
Bollocks is working really hard to secure the rear naked choke. Ali defends successfully for a significant amount of time. Both fighters are looking very determined.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight.
Ali trying to get back to his feet but Bollocks is in full control for now.
Bollocks is looking to control Ali but Ali is wriggling around and keeping busy.
Ali is taking damage to the body and head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Muhammad Ali dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Silly Bollocks's cut.
That's time! Ali's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. So, we enter the final round. Let's see if either fighter can bring us a finish, or whether we're going to the judges scorecards.
Ali throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Bollocks closes this distance looking for a takedown but Ali circles away.
Ali throws a right and a left that both miss.
Bollocks lands a jab to the head.
Ali closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Bollocks shoots in but Ali avoids the takedown attempt easily.
Bollocks takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Ali tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Ali misses with a double jab.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Ali closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Bollocks tries to grapple but his opponent circles
and Ali counters with a lovely straight right hand!
That's one minute gone in the round.
Bollocks walks into a left hand.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
A telegraphed takedown attempt from Bollocks is defended easily by Ali.
Muhammad Ali has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Silly Bollocks.
Bollocks takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Ali goes to the watering hole and comes back with a big thumbs up from the judges as he scores a three punch combo.
Ali scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Ali lands a jab followed by a nice looking cross.
Bollocks misses with a head kick.
Ali throws a combination. Bollocks tries to block but a couple of punches get through.
Ali lands a jab-cross combination.
Ali throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Bollocks has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
Bollocks shoots in but no luck this time.
Bollocks tries to clinch but Ali moves away
and Ali counters with a nice body shot.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ali stuffs the takedown attempt from Bollocks. Bollocks gets slowly back to his feet.
Bollocks takes one to the chin there.
Bollocks misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Ali throws a nice looking combination but Bollocks bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Bollocks throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Muhammad Ali is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Bollocks shoots in for a takedown but doesn't get it.
No luck with that takedown attempt from Bollocks.
Ali lands with a two punch combination before moving back out of range.
Ali closes the distance and lands a one-two.
A head kick misses from Bollocks.
Bollocks is on the wrong end of a nice combination from Ali.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bollocks wants to clinch up but Ali keeps it at a distance.
Ali moves into range and throws a combination. A nice jab followed by a hook to the body.
The fight stays on the outside here - Bollocks looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Ali connects with a nice looking jab.
Bollocks shoots in looking for a double leg takedown. Ali defends it nicely.
Ali scores with a one two! Bollocks had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.
Ali misses with a series of wild punches.
Bollocks fails to land the takedown.
No luck for Bollocks with that takedown attempt.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Bollocks takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
Ali misses with a combination
so Bollocks counters with a double leg into guard. Good agility.
Bollocks is looking to stand up but Ali won't let him.
Bollocks trying to control but Ali is working from the bottom.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Ali working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Bollocks.
Ali wants to stand but Bollocks is controlling the position.
Silly Bollocks has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Muhammad Ali is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Bollocks sneaks a leg through and gets to half guard. That was like a knife through butter how easily he passed Ali's guard.
And that's the end of the fight!
That was a close round. You could make an argument for either fighter but I would give it to Muhammad Ali.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Ali, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Ben Zyskovitsi scores the fight 30:27
Judge Johanna Lukiainen scores the fight 30:27
Judge Matti Vanhoillinen scores the fight 30:27
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Muhammad Ali!
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
52% |
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