PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a lightweight MMA rules bout between Dick Destruction (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jack Black (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Destruction might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to Earth Sized Microwave by Japanese Torture Comedy Hour. On his way into the cage it seems that Dick Destruction has been attacked by a crazed fan! It looks like it might have been the just bleed guy! Luckily Dick Destruction seems to be OK! I thought that lunatic was in prison!?

Destruction
vs
Black

179 cm
23
165 lbs
3 - 0 - 0

176 cm
25
160 lbs
6 - 5 - 1

BJJ Purple Belt
Excellent MT
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
Decent boxing
Powerful

[TNS] 160!

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the lightweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 3 - 0 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Dick Destruction!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 5 - 1, fighting out of St Petersburg, Jack Black!
The judges for this bout are Igor Prikhodko, Ivan Kurochkin and Viktor Lagutenko.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Black bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Destruction throws a nice outside leg kick.
Destruction buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Black takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
Destruction jabs at Black's body.
Destruction leaves Black with his face pressed against the mat as he sprawls beautifully, defending against a solid takedown attempt.
Black swings for the body but Destruction moves out of range.
Destruction avoids the body shot from Black.

Black shoots in for a takedown and gets it.

Black is trying a forearm choke… I don't think that's going to do much at this level of the game.

Black is looking for a kimura but Destruction is holding onto that half guard position, so it's hard for Black to get the leverage.
Black tries to pass the half guard into mount. Destruction knows what he's doing though and prevents the attempt.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Black is trying for a guillotine from the top but the pressure isn't in the right place so Destruction is just riding it out for now. Black eventually gives up the hold.
Destruction trying to hold on to Black's head to control him but Black postures up.

Black stands up out of the half guard.

Black closes the distance and clinches up, looking for a takedown. He shifts his weight and gets a nice trip into half guard.
Destruction is looking to control Black's leg but it's slowly edging free. Can Destruction avoid being mounted?
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Destruction manages to get to full guard.

Black stands up and waves to Destruction to follow him.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Black fails to land the takedown.
Destruction lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
Destruction walks into a jab.
Destruction throws a sloppy head kick and Black moves out of range easily.
Destruction looks to score with a jab to the body but Black is just out of range.
Destruction tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.
Black connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Destruction looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Destruction misses with a body kick.
Black thows a body shot but no joy.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Black shoots in for a takedown. He's persisting with it as Destruction sprawls well. Destruction wins this battle and keeps the fight standing. Black gets slowly back to his feet.
Dick Destruction has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jack Black.
Destruction ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Black moves away.
A decent looking cross lands there for Destruction.
A nice combination there by Black.
Black slips under a jab.
Black swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Destruction misses with a straight right.
Black dives in and grabs Destruction's left leg, looking for a takedown. Destruction pushes down on Black's head and hops out.
Black throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Destruction closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so.
Destruction lands a head kick. Black smiles back at him and beckons him forward.

Destruction darts in and clinches Black up against the cage.

Destruction escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Destruction moves into range and connects with a jab.
Black keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Destruction throws a big shot that misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Good leg kick by Destruction there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
Black swats away the attempt to clinch by Destruction.
Destruction jabs away that one connects to the head of his opponent.
Destruction lands a nice looking body shot.
Destruction cracks Black with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage.
Black just misses with a punch to the body.
Dick Destruction is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
No luck with that takedown attempt from Black.
Destruction pushes Black away with a front kick.
Black looks gassed!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
A slapping leg kick lands for Destruction.
Black throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
A shot to the body from Destruction misses

and Black counters with a nice single leg takedown and he's in Destruction's guard now.
Destruction managing to control the position.
Black is looking to stand up but Destruction won't let him.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Jack Black dominated that round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action.

Black showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Destruction.
Black changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Destruction tries to avoid it but Black manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Destruction to the ground. Destruction escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Destruction tries a head kick but it misses.
Destruction slips under a jab from Black.
Destruction throws a head kick but Black moves out of range.
Black looks for a takedown but Destruction sprawls well.
Destruction scores with a crisp jab that stopped Black in his tracks.
Black takes one on the chin but seems OK.
Black fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.
Dick Destruction has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jack Black.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Destruction scores with a jab to the head.
Nice defenses there by Black.
Black takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.
Destruction takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Black avoids the body shot from Destruction.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Destruction connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Destruction throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Black is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down Destruction rather than just go for the knockout.
Destruction missing with a left hand there. Black was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Destruction scores with a hook.
Black steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from Destruction. That one must have hurt.
Black shoots in for a double leg but Destruction sprawls well. That's going to sap some energy.
Black is breathing heavily.
Destruction with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
Destruction dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Black. That did some damage!
Destruction misses with a jab, cross combination.
Black has a nice red mark on his side after a thudding body kick by Destruction.
Destruction throws a leg kick which misses Black's front leg but catches the back leg as Black tries to avoid it.
Destruction lands with a good body shot.
Black uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Destruction.
Destruction throws a hook but Black avoids it easily.
Destruction missing with a left hand there. Black was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Destruction lands a nice looking body shot.
Dick Destruction seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Destruction cracks Black with an open hand slap.
Destruction throws a sloppy head kick and Black moves out of range easily.
Black throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Destruction lands a nice leg kick that just misses Black's sensitive parts.

Destruction gets caught flat footed, as Black shoots in with a quick takedown into guard.
Black pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Destruction is keeping the position for now.
Black wants to stand but Destruction has a closed guard, so he can't escape.
Black postures up.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

Black is holding a leg here, probably looking for an ankle lock - he drops back and goes for it! Destruction is in trouble! Is it all over??? No! Destruction has escaped and now he's on top!
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Destruction is stalling in the full guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Destruction's ground tactics aren't going to win him many fans. Let's hope he's got fireworks for us if he gets back to his feet because he's not doing much on the ground.
Black is trying to stand up but he's not managed so far.
Destruction is intent on slowing down the pace of the fight, simply looking to control.
Black keeping moving, preventing Destruction from controlling successfully.
Black can't do much from the bottom at the moment, as Destruction controls the pace.
Destruction prevents Black from getting back to his feet.
Destruction trying to control but Black is working from the bottom.
Destruction won't allow Black to get back to his feet.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A lull in the action here being met with boos from the crowd.
Destruction slows down the pace of the fight for a moment. He'll need to remain active if he doesn't want to see the fight stood back up.

The referee stands the fighters back up. Dick Destruction just wasn't active enough from the dominant position.
Black takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
Destruction moves out of range as Black strikes.
Both fighters circling a little - Destruction finishes the exchange with a kick to the body.
Black misses the shot to the body.
Black takes a thudding leg kick, right into the meat of the thigh.
Destruction throws a body kick that sends a sickening thudding noise reverberating around the arena.
Black throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Destruction lands with a cross.
Black shoots for a takedown but Destruction saw that one coming a mile off and avoided it easily.
Black shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Dick Destruction dominated that second round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. Let's get this one finished - here comes the final round!

Destruction lands a jab to Black's midsection.
Destruction punishes Black's body with a nice straight punch.
Destruction takes a swing at Black's ribcage but misses.
Black's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
Black shoots in but Destruction avoids the takedown attempt easily.
Black misses with a shot to the body
and Destruction counters with a thumping low kick.
Black takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
Black takes a swing at Destruction's ribcage but misses.
Destruction throws a right and a left that Black avoids nicely.
Destruction moves into range and throws a lovely three punch combination.
Black takes a head kick and keeps coming.
Black walks straight into a jab right on the nose. That one stung - he's blinking and trying to clear his head.
Destruction looks to throw the jab but Black is out of range.
Destruction is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Black.
Destruction scores with a body shot.
Black takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Black has his head snapped back a nice jab. A little nod from Black there as he acknowledges the shot.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Destruction throws a body punch but Black moves out of range.
Destruction misses with a looping right.
Black fails miserably with a takedown attempt.
A really sloppy takedown attempt there from Black.
Dick Destruction has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jack Black.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Destruction.
Destruction throws a good cross that connects.
Dick Destruction is winning the standup battle so far.
Destruction lands with a slapping head kick.

Destruction fakes with an overhand right and moves in to clinch with Black, pushing him back against the cage.
Destruction lands an elbow inside that Black shrugs off.
A right handed body shot lands from Destruction.

Destruction manages to break the clinch.
Destruction comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.

Destruction fakes with an overhand right and moves in to clinch with Black, pushing him back against the cage.
Destruction connects with a nasty looking knee right to Black's face.
Destruction is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body.
Black drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Destruction gets the underhooks and prevents it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Destruction lands a hook that snaps the head of Black backwards.
Destruction lands an elbow inside that Black shrugs off.
Destruction lands a body punch in the clinch.

Destruction breaks from the clinch.
Destruction lands a body shot.
Destruction buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Destruction scores with a punch to the head.
Destruction fakes and then throws a beautiful body shot. Black looks a bit winded and takes a step backwards to take a breath.
Black is trying hard to land a takedown here. Destruction sprawls well and keeps this one on the feet.
Destruction thumps Black with a low kick.

Destruction rushes Black and presses him up against the cage.
Destruction lands a glancing elbow in the clinch.
Destruction gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
Destruction lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!
Black takes an elbow to the temple.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Destruction lands a nice knee to the body.
Destruction lands an elbow inside that Black shrugs off.
Destruction is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Nice elbow from Destruction.
Destruction lands a body punch in the clinch.
Destruction lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
Black wants a takedown but no success here.
Black takes an elbow to the temple.
Destruction scores a nice knee to the body.

Destruction breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.

Destruction clinches up against the cage.
Black is working for takedown but Destruction is calmly controlling the position for now.
Destruction using the Thai clinch to land knees to the body.
Black takes an elbow to the forehead.
Destruction gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
Destruction lands an elbow just above Black 's eye.
Destruction stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body.
Destruction stops a takedown attempt from Black.
Destruction lands a damaging elbow.
Destruction connects with a knee to the head.
Destruction lands a body punch in the clinch.
Good body shot from Destruction.
Destruction lands a hook that snaps the head of Black backwards.
Destruction landing knees to the body.
Destruction lands a nice elbow from the clinch.
Black tries to score a body lock takedown but Destruction shows good agility there to stay on his feet.
Black has hold of a leg and is looking for a trip takedown. Destruction avoids it nicely though and we remain in the clinch.
Destruction lands a nice elbow from the clinch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Destruction using the Thai clinch to land knees to the body.
Destruction lands an elbow just above Black 's eye.
Black has a body lock and is looking for a takedown. Destruction is bouncing around trying to prevent the takedown and somehow he has indeed managed to stay on his feet.
Destruction lands a good knee to the midsection. Black won't want to take too many of those.
Black takes a knee right on the jaw!

Destruction breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Destruction tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Black was well out of range. Poor timing from Destruction.
Destruction defends well against a solid takedown attempt from Black.
Some wild striking there from Destruction.
A solid leg kick lands there for Destruction.
Destruction buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Black fails with the takedown.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Black showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Destruction.
Good leg kick by Destruction there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.

And that's the end of the fight!
Dick Destruction showed his dominance in that final round.
I think Destruction has won this one but let's see what the judges have to say. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Igor Prikhodko scores the fight 29:27
Judge Ivan Kurochkin scores the fight 29:27
Judge Viktor Lagutenko scores the fight 29:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Dick Destruction!