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Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Dick Valentine (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Valentine might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to I Buy the Drugs. Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!



181 cm
21
180 lbs
3 - 1 - 0
178 cm
26
183 lbs
12 - 12 - 1
Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Granite chin
Good wrestler
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank


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-


Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 3 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Montreal, Dick Valentine!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 12 - 12 - 1, fighting out of Montreal, Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff!
The judges for this bout are Steve Smith, Gregory Folan and Trevor Gratis.




The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Valentine throws a body punch but Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range.
Valentine swings for the body but Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range.
Valentine throws a mid kick that lands with a slap.
Valentine uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Whoddanikabollokoff.
A punch combination from Whoddanikabollokoff misses.
Whoddanikabollokoff lands a body shot.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a series of wild punches.
Valentine jabs Whoddanikabollokoff right on the nose. Whoddanikabollokoff blinks but takes it well.
Valentine throws out a loose jab but Whoddanikabollokoff uses good head movement to avoid it.
Valentine misses with a body shot.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a double jab.
Valentine shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
A combination from Whoddanikabollokoff does no damage.
Whoddanikabollokoff walks forward, straight into a front kick from Valentine.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses the shot to the body.
Whoddanikabollokoff falls off balance throwing a combination
and Valentine counters with an outside leg kick.
A low kick from Whoddanikabollokoff is predictable there
and Valentine connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Valentine throws out a loose jab but Whoddanikabollokoff uses good head movement to avoid it.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a low kick.
Whoddanikabollokoff needs to keep his hands up - Valentine had a free shot at his head there.
Whoddanikabollokoff chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Valentine can pounce on him.

Whoddanikabollokoff tries to keep at a distance but Valentine has taken the fight into the clinch.
Valentine goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Whoddanikabollokoff avoiding damage as Valentine throws knees to the body.
Whoddanikabollokoff prevents a body shot from Valentine.
Valentine misses with a knee to the head.
Valentine doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Valentine misses with a punch to the body.
Valentine throws a head punch that misses.
Nice body punch from Valentine.
Valentine tries to throw a body punch but Whoddanikabollokoff avoids it by throwing Valentine back against the ropes.
Valentine lands on the inside with an uppercut.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Valentine pushes off and fires off an elbow that misses, before clinching up again, against the ropes.

Whoddanikabollokoff breaks from the clinch.
No luck with that takedown attempt from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Valentine lands a lovely overhand right.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Valentine misses with a wild body shot.
Sloppy strikes from Valentine. Those never looked like landing.
The fighters circling - Valentine throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Valentine throws a low kick but Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range easily.
Valentine throws a nice inside leg kick.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.
Whoddanikabollokoff avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in for a takedown but Valentine shows good takedown defense there and keeps this one on the feet.
Dick Valentine has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff defending well as Valentine loads up on a big left hand.
Whoddanikabollokoff connects with a single shot there.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Valentine tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Whoddanikabollokoff was well out of range. Poor timing from Valentine.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a lazy right hand but Valentine sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Sloppy strikes from Whoddanikabollokoff. Those never looked like landing.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
A big left from Valentine misses.
Whoddanikabollokoff feints a jab promting Valentine to slip. Whoddanikabollokoff then demonstrates his capabilities by jabbing again. Valentine slips again and ducks right into an uppercut.
Whoddanikabollokoff feints a jab promting Valentine to slip. Whoddanikabollokoff then demonstrates his capabilities by jabbing again. Valentine slips again and ducks right into an uppercut.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a low kick.
Valentine throws the kick towards the body but Whoddanikabollokoff avoids it.
Valentine misses the shot to the body.
A solid leg kick lands there for Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in for a takedown but doesn't get it.
Valentine jabs Whoddanikabollokoff right on the nose. Whoddanikabollokoff blinks but takes it well.
Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Whoddanikabollokoff rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Valentine moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in looking for a takedown but Valentine manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Whoddanikabollokoff's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Valentine jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Valentine scores with a jab to the body.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Valentine waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Valentine.
Whoddanikabollokoff keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Whoddanikabollokoff takes a swing at Valentine's ribcage but misses.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a series of wild punches.
A telegraphed right hand from Valentine misses the target.
Valentine avoids a punch combination nicely.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a jab, cross combination.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Sloppy strikes from Whoddanikabollokoff. Those never looked like landing.
Valentine misses with the combination.
Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range of the strikes.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Dick Valentine dominated that round.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.


Valentine looks to land a combination but Whoddanikabollokoff avoids it well.
Valentine uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Valentine has not gone for a single takedown so far in this fight, which seems like a very strange tactic when you consider that he has the superior wrestling and BJJ.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.
Valentine fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Whoddanikabollokoff manages to avoid it.
Nice sprawl there from Valentine as Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in.
Valentine lands a body shot.
Whoddanikabollokoff closes this distance looking for a takedown but Valentine circles away.
Dick Valentine has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Whoddanikabollokoff pivots, looking for a leg kick but Valentine is out of range and Whoddanikabollokoff settles back down.
Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Valentine misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Valentine comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Valentine throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Valentine scores with a jab. Whoddanikabollokoff acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
Valentine tries to close the distance and clinch but Whoddanikabollokoff swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
A shot to the liver by Whoddanikabollokoff. Beautiful body shot.
Valentine throws a shot from downtown. Whoddanikabollokoff moves away and avoids it.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Whoddanikabollokoff connects with a lovely right hand, straight down the pipe.
A combination from Whoddanikabollokoff does no damage.
Valentine throws a body punch but Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range.
Valentine bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Whoddanikabollokoff's head.
Valentine connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Valentine misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Valentine throws a poor cross that misses
and Whoddanikabollokoff counters with a nice uppercut.
Valentine digs a good hook to Whoddanikabollokoff's body.
Valentine misses with a looping right.
Whoddanikabollokoff avoids a low kick by using good footwork.
Valentine misses with a straight left.
Whoddanikabollokoff wants to slow Valentine down by chopping away at his legs.
Valentine throws a leg kick which misses Whoddanikabollokoff's front leg but catches the back leg as Whoddanikabollokoff tries to avoid it.
Whoddanikabollokoff avoids the body shot from Valentine.
A lazy left from Valentine finds it's target.
Valentine misses with a wild body shot.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Valentine just misses with a punch to the body.
Whoddanikabollokoff is trying desperately to land a takedown but Valentine is having absolutely none of it. This is turning into a bit of a nightmare for Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a series of punches but Valentine moves out of range.
Dick Valentine is winning the standup battle so far.
Whoddanikabollokoff lands with a nice combination. Valentine backs away looking to recover.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Valentine throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Valentine tried to score with a low kick but Whoddanikabollokoff checks it.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Valentine pinned against the ropes. Valentine gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
Valentine misses with a hook. Whoddanikabollokoff ducked under it nicely.
The fighters are going at a pretty good pace and they're both starting to sweat now.
Valentine throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Valentine digs a good hook to Whoddanikabollokoff's body.
Dick Valentine is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Whoddanikabollokoff swings for the body but Valentine moves out of range.
Valentine throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a left and a right that both miss
and Valentine counters with a nice body shot.
Whoddanikabollokoff is breathing heavily.
Whoddanikabollokoff bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in for a takedown. He's persisting with it as Valentine sprawls well. Valentine wins this battle and keeps the fight standing. Whoddanikabollokoff gets slowly back to his feet.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a leg kick but he was too far away and it doesn't land.
Valentine connects with a solid leg kick.
Valentine is looking to slow Whoddanikabollokoff down with leg kicks.
Valentine displays good takedown defense there as he swats away a double leg from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Valentine looks to score with a jab to the body but Whoddanikabollokoff is just out of range.
Valentine tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
A jab from Valentine misses.
Valentine scores with a hook to the body. Whoddanikabollokoff takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
Whoddanikabollokoff looks for a takedown here. Will he get it? Valentine is fending him off so far but Whoddanikabollokoff persists. Nope, Valentine circles away and we're back to standing.
Valentine tests Whoddanikabollokoff's chin there with a solid looking shot.
Valentine tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Whoddanikabollokoff is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down Valentine rather than just go for the knockout.
Valentine turns his hip over beautifully as he lands a nice leg kick.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A telegraphed takedown attempt from Whoddanikabollokoff is defended easily by Valentine.
Valentine throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Whoddanikabollokoff shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Valentine pinned against the ropes. Valentine gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
A swing and a miss from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Valentine wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
Valentine ducks down and throws a hook to the body.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Whoddanikabollokoff takes one on the button.
Valentine missing with a left hand there. Whoddanikabollokoff was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Valentine fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Whoddanikabollokoff manages to avoid it.
Valentine bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
A leg kick checked by Valentine.
Valentine tries to close the distance and clinch but Whoddanikabollokoff swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Dick Valentine dominated that second round.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final round!


Valentine moves into range and connects with a jab.
Valentine throws a sloppy head kick and Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range easily.
Whoddanikabollokoff takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Valentine connects with a right hand. Whoddanikabollokoff shakes it off.
Whoddanikabollokoff fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Valentine manages to avoid it.
Valentine throws a big shot that misses.
Some wild striking there from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff moves out of range as Valentine strikes.
Some wild striking there from Valentine.
Whoddanikabollokoff misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Valentine misses with a wild body shot.
A combination from Whoddanikabollokoff does no damage.
Whoddanikabollokoff throws a low kick but Valentine avoids it.
Whoddanikabollokoff swings for the body but Valentine moves out of range.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Valentine takes a swing at Whoddanikabollokoff's ribcage but misses.
Valentine misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
Valentine avoids the body shot from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Valentine tries to clinch up.
Valentine dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Whoddanikabollokoff. That did some damage!
Left hook, right uppercut from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Valentine works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
Whoddanikabollokoff smiles there as he lands a nice right hand right on the button.
Whoddanikabollokoff avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Whoddanikabollokoff slips under a jab.
Whoddanikabollokoff pivots, looking for a leg kick but Valentine is out of range and Whoddanikabollokoff settles back down.
Valentine throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Valentine displays good takedown defense there as he swats away a double leg from Whoddanikabollokoff.
Whoddanikabollokoff closes the distance and clinches up with Valentine, looking for a takedown. Whoddanikabollokoff pushes Valentine against the ropes but Valentine circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The fighters circle momentarily. Valentine darts into range and connects with a nice straight punch.
Valentine is looking to clinch but Whoddanikabollokoff is avoiding it.
Valentine lands with a shot to the body.
Valentine jabs at Whoddanikabollokoff's body.

Valentine instigates a clinch.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Valentine gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
Valentine misses with a body punch.
Valentine lands an elbow inside.
Valentine lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
Valentine missing with knees to the body.
Valentine lands an elbow just above Whoddanikabollokoff 's eye.


It looks like Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff has been cut.
Whoddanikabollokoff blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Whoddanikabollokoff can't break the clinch.
Valentine scores with a shoulder strike.
Whoddanikabollokoff's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Whoddanikabollokoff is trying to drag Valentine to the mat but Valentine just about manages to keep his footing. He used the ropes to his advantage there.
Dick Valentine has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jean Paul Whoddanikabollokoff.
A short right from Valentine on the inside.
Whoddanikabollokoff drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Valentine gets the underhooks and prevents it.
Whoddanikabollokoff takes an elbow to the forehead.
Valentine throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
Valentine lands a nice knee to the body.
Valentine lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Whoddanikabollokoff is looking for a takedown up against the ropes. Valentine gets underhooks though and prevents the takedown attempt.
Valentine tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
With the fighters up against the ropes, Valentine throws an elbow but misses.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Valentine.
Whoddanikabollokoff prevents a body shot from Valentine.
Valentine fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Valentine lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Valentine throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Whoddanikabollokoff blocks it with crossed arms.
Valentine misses with the head strike.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Valentine.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Whoddanikabollokoff blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Valentine lands an uppercut.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Valentine throws an elbow but it misses.
Valentine tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Valentine swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Dick Valentine is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Valentine misses with a knee to the head.

And that's the end of the fight!
Dick Valentine showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Valentine has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Steve Smith scores the fight 30:27
Judge Gregory Folan scores the fight 30:27
Judge Trevor Gratis scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Dick Valentine!
S C
A
G S C
B
G S C G energy
A | B
hype
A | B
pop
A | B
mgr
A | B
FIGHT
RATING
73%
 
 
 
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