PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a middleweight MMA rules bout between Hans Gruber (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Roscoe P Coltrane (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Gruber comes to the cage accompanied by Irwin Goodman - St. Pauli Ja Reeperbahn. Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the cage.

Gruber
vs
P Coltrane

180 cm
27
193 lbs
10 - 7 - 0

195 cm
25
190 lbs
6 - 1 - 0

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Very quick

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Heavy handed

Undead clothing

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the middleweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 10 - 7 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Hans Gruber!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Roscoe P Coltrane!
The judges for this bout are Ben Zyskovitsi, Matti Vanhoillinen and Roosa Järviläinen.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Gruber will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
Gruber attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
Roscoe P Coltrane seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
P Coltrane lands a jab to Gruber's midsection.
Gruber slips a straight right by P Coltrane.
P Coltrane blocks a low kick nicely.
Gruber misses with a low kick.
P Coltrane checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
P Coltrane stuns Gruber with a nice body shot, before stepping back out of range.
Gruber ducks right into an uppercut from P Coltrane.
P Coltrane swings for the body but Gruber moves out of range.
Gruber with poor footwork there. He got himself in a bit of a tangle, enabling P Coltrane to score with a decent uppercut.
P Coltrane moves out of range as Gruber throws a body kick.
Gruber throws a low kick but P Coltrane avoids it.
Gruber tries to clinch up.
P Coltrane feints a straight left to the body, then turns around with a flashy move and hits Grubers jaw with a dramatic spinning back fist!

Gruber gets caught on his heels momentarily as he allows P Coltrane to score an easy takedown into full guard.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
We must be close to a standup if these guys don't pick up the pace.
P Coltrane throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Gruber keeping full guard, as P Coltrane tries to pass.
P Coltrane has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
P Coltrane is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.
Gruber manages to land a sweep and now he's in mount on top!
Gruber connects with a couple of good shots from mount.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
P Coltrane avoids a series of strikes thrown by Gruber.
Gruber working away from the top, dropping strikes.
P Coltrane wriggling around on the bottom manages to avoid the strikes thrown by Gruber.
P Coltrane keeping his composure momentarily, calmly looking to get back to half guard.
A nice elbow there by Gruber.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Gruber looking to finish with strikes here!
P Coltrane manages to regain half guard whilst avoiding the strikes.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Gruber is trying to control the action in half guard but P Coltrane is working away on the bottom, looking perhaps to get back to full guard.
P Coltrane avoiding damage under a succession of punches from Gruber.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Gruber thows a huge punch but P Coltrane dodges it nicely.
Gruber missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
P Coltrane is looking to improve his position.
Gruber working over P Coltrane with some ground and pound. P Coltrane looks like he wants out of this position, which is understandable.
Gruber working over P Coltrane with some ground and pound. P Coltrane looks like he wants out of this position, which is understandable.
Gruber thumps the canvas. Not on purpose obviously - he just missed P Coltrane's head.
The fighters are battling for position here. P Coltrane manages to regain full guard. Nice work.
Gruber throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.

Gruber got a little sloppy there for a moment and P Coltrane has worked his way into a loose triangle - can he finish it?! No, Gruber has managed to get both his arms back between P Coltrane's legs - danger averted.
Gruber trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Gruber stopping the sweep attempt from P Coltrane.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Gruber stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. P Coltrane swivels though and keeps the full guard.
Gruber wants to control from the top but P Coltrane keeps moving.
Gruber throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as P Coltrane works some decent striking defense from the bottom.
Gruber seems content to control from guard here. He's going to have to remain active though if he doesn't want to get stood back up.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Gruber keeps in close for a moment and lands a decent shot to the side of P Coltrane's head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Hans Gruber dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

P Coltrane sizes up Gruber with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
A shot to the liver by P Coltrane. Beautiful body shot.
P Coltrane lands a nice shot to the body.
Gruber tries to work over P Coltrane's front leg with a kick but P Coltrane checks it.
P Coltrane misses with a double jab.
P Coltrane just misses with a punch to the body.
P Coltrane lands a nice shot to the body.
P Coltrane looks for a takedown here. Will he get it? Gruber is fending him off so far but P Coltrane persists. Nope, Gruber circles away and we're back to standing.
P Coltrane ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.
P Coltrane is using his reach advantage to land shots from outside his opponent's range.
P Coltrane lands with a nice body punch.
Gruber wants to clinch.
P Coltrane checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
Gruber drops his hands momentarily and P Coltrane takes advantage with a crisp shot to the head.
P Coltrane lands with an uppercut that bounces Gruber off the cage and back into range.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Gruber fakes with the hands and throws a leg kick but P Coltrane is out of range.
Gruber tries to close the distance and clinch up but P Coltrane swats him away and circles back towards the center.
P Coltrane misses with a wild body shot.
Gruber is looking to chop away at P Coltrane's legs.
P Coltrane moves out of range of the body kick.
P Coltrane lunges at Gruber with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Gruber's hand.
P Coltrane lands a nice shot that snaps Gruber's head back.
Gruber misses with a leg kick
and P Coltrane counters with a nice uppercut.
Gruber tries a head kick but it misses.
P Coltrane thuds his right hand into Gruber's forehead from close range. That could be painful for both fighters.
A jab from P Coltrane misses.
P Coltrane misses with a body shot.
Gruber throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
Gruber cracks P Coltrane with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage.
Hans Gruber is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Gruber moves forwards but P Coltrane connects with a nice, crisp jab.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
P Coltrane swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
P Coltrane scores with a jab to the jaw of his opponent.
Gruber with poor footwork there. He got himself in a bit of a tangle, enabling P Coltrane to score with a decent uppercut.
Gruber tried to score with a low kick but P Coltrane checks it.
P Coltrane cracks Gruber with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
Gruber takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
P Coltrane misses with a wild body shot.
Gruber doesn't manage to clinch there - P Coltrane circles away.
Gruber loads up on a big right hand but P Coltrane slips the punch.
P Coltrane stalks Gruber and leaps in with a furious combination of punches. Uppercuts and crosses smash into Gruber's face. Gruber staggers backwards, shaken.
Roscoe P Coltrane seems to be getting the better of the standup.
P Coltrane scores with a three punch combo!

Gruber is rocked!
P Coltrane throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Oh Gruber is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!!
Gruber looks up at the clock. Bad move! P Coltrane lands a right hand from hell, dropping Gruber. P Coltrane pounces and finishes the fight with a flurry of punches and elbows.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:50 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Roscoe P Coltrane!