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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a lightweight MMA rules bout between Hack MacDonald Jr (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Dumbass McWeakhands (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). MacDonald Jr's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Cowboys From Hell by Pantera. On his way into the cage it seems that Hack MacDonald Jr has been attacked by a crazed fan! It looks like it might have been the just bleed guy! Luckily Hack MacDonald Jr seems to be OK! I thought that lunatic was in prison!?
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| 190 cm
25
159 lbs
12 - 4 - 0 |
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168 cm
30
165 lbs
18 - 5 - 1 |
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Granite chin |
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Good wrestler
World class boxer
Heavy handed |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the lightweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
12 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Hack MacDonald Jr!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
18 - 5 - 1, fighting out of Los Angeles, Dumbass McWeakhands!
The judges for this bout are Alan Glass, Wesley Smith and Tiny Johnson.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
McWeakhands walks straight into a jab right on the nose. That one stung - he's blinking and trying to clear his head.
McWeakhands fakes high and swings low for a body shot but MacDonald Jr manages to avoid it.
MacDonald Jr misses with a low kick.
MacDonald Jr takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
Dumbass McWeakhands seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
MacDonald Jr throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
MacDonald Jr scoring well with a low kick there.
MacDonald Jr takes one on the button.
A punch lands to the side of MacDonald Jr 's head but he takes it in his stride.
McWeakhands blocks the body kick.
MacDonald Jr throws a head kick that misses.
MacDonald Jr misses with a straight left.
McWeakhands lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but MacDonald Jr circles away quickly and effectively.
McWeakhands throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
MacDonald Jr connects with the punch.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
MacDonald Jr checks the leg kick nicely there.
That's one minute gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr wants to slow McWeakhands down by chopping away at his legs.
McWeakhands scores with a hook to the body. MacDonald Jr takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
MacDonald Jr thows a body shot but no joy.
McWeakhands throws a right and a left that both miss.
MacDonald Jr scores with a jab. McWeakhands acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
MacDonald Jr is looking to slow McWeakhands down with leg kicks.
MacDonald Jr thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on McWeakhands if he has to take too many more of those.
McWeakhands misses with a wild body shot.
McWeakhands bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
McWeakhands dodges the punch combination from MacDonald Jr.
McWeakhands steps to the side to avoid the strikes from MacDonald Jr.
McWeakhands swings for the body but MacDonald Jr moves out of range.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr moves out of range of the leg kick from McWeakhands.
McWeakhands throws a body punch but MacDonald Jr moves out of range.
A kick lands to the mid section there for McWeakhands.
That kick from McWeakhands tenderised MacDonald Jr's leg. MacDonald Jr is trying to keep his angry face on.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
McWeakhands misses with a series of wild punches.
MacDonald Jr throws a leg kick but McWeakhands moved away.
McWeakhands rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but MacDonald Jr moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
McWeakhands sizes up MacDonald Jr with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
McWeakhands is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
A low kick from McWeakhands is predictable there
and MacDonald Jr counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps McWeakhands thinking.
MacDonald Jr throws a body kick that digs right into the meat.
MacDonald Jr listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
McWeakhands fakes high and swings low for a body shot but MacDonald Jr manages to avoid it.
A slapping leg kick lands for McWeakhands.
MacDonald Jr feints with a shoulder and throws a nice leg kick to McWeakhands's calf.
McWeakhands throws a leg kick
and MacDonald Jr counters with an outside leg kick.
McWeakhands is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down MacDonald Jr rather than just go for the knockout.
McWeakhands misses the body punch
and MacDonald Jr counters with a stiff right hand.
McWeakhands avoids the head kick by MacDonald Jr.
McWeakhands misses with a low kick.
MacDonald Jr tries to score with an inside leg kick but telegraphs it and McWeakhands is able to avoid easily.
McWeakhands lands a slapping body shot.
McWeakhands misses with a hook.
McWeakhands takes one to the chin there.
McWeakhands misses the shot to the body.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
A head kick misses from MacDonald Jr.
MacDonald Jr misses with a series of wild punches.
McWeakhands goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
McWeakhands will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
McWeakhands keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
MacDonald Jr throws a sloppy head kick and McWeakhands moves out of range easily.
MacDonald Jr avoids the body shot from McWeakhands.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
MacDonald Jr fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and McWeakhands has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.
McWeakhands wants to slow MacDonald Jr down by chopping away at his legs.
McWeakhands lands with an uppercut that bounces MacDonald Jr off the cage and back into range.
MacDonald Jr lands a glancing blow to the side of McWeakhands's head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
That was a close round but I would say that Hack MacDonald Jr will probably get the nod.
That's time! MacDonald Jr's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.
McWeakhands moves forwards but MacDonald Jr connects with a nice, crisp jab.
MacDonald Jr with a nice cross.
An inside leg kick lands from MacDonald Jr.
McWeakhands avoids the body shot from MacDonald Jr.
Hack MacDonald Jr is winning the standup battle so far.
McWeakhands lands a really nice looking cross but MacDonald Jr seems unphased.
McWeakhands punishes MacDonald Jr's body with a nice straight punch.
McWeakhands throws a low kick, looking for MacDonald Jr's leg but MacDonald Jr calmly moves out of range.
MacDonald Jr misses with a wild body shot.
MacDonald Jr lands with a slapping head kick.
McWeakhands misses with a telegraphed body shot
and MacDonald Jr counters with a straight right hand.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
MacDonald Jr misses with a hook.
MacDonald Jr scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
MacDonald Jr misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
That's one minute gone in the round.
McWeakhands tried to score with a low kick but MacDonald Jr checks it.
MacDonald Jr checks a low kick from McWeakhands.
McWeakhands thows a leg kick but MacDonald Jr checks it
and MacDonald Jr counters with an outside leg kick.
McWeakhands dodges the punch combination from MacDonald Jr.
MacDonald Jr is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
McWeakhands on the wrong end of a nice hook.
McWeakhands swings wildly with a couple of big hooks
and MacDonald Jr counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena.
MacDonald Jr throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
McWeakhands fakes a jab and throws a low kick but MacDonald Jr checks it well.
MacDonald Jr cracks McWeakhands with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage.
MacDonald Jr connects with a leg kick. McWeakhands looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
MacDonald Jr moves his head to the side to avoid a jab but walks straight into a cross.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr misses with an uppercut.
MacDonald Jr walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. McWeakhands checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
MacDonald Jr throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
A thudding body kick lands there by MacDonald Jr!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
MacDonald Jr throws the left hand but McWeakhands avoids the punch easily.
MacDonald Jr lets the fists fly and connects with a left straight followed by a right hook.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from MacDonald Jr.
MacDonald Jr looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
McWeakhands cracks the inside of MacDonald Jr's front leg.
McWeakhands lands with a right hand.
MacDonald Jr takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
McWeakhands dodges the punch combination from MacDonald Jr.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
McWeakhands lands with a good body shot.
MacDonald Jr checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
McWeakhands blocks a low kick nicely.
McWeakhands staying out of range there.
MacDonald Jr on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
MacDonald Jr staying out of range there.
MacDonald Jr keeping at a good range here, avoiding a leg kick.
MacDonald Jr moves out of range of the body kick.
McWeakhands scores with a crisp jab that stopped MacDonald Jr in his tracks.
MacDonald Jr keeping at a good range here, avoiding a leg kick.
McWeakhands misses the shot to the body.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr is looking to chop away at McWeakhands's legs.
That kick from MacDonald Jr tenderised McWeakhands's leg. McWeakhands is trying to keep his angry face on.
MacDonald Jr throws a nice outside leg kick.
McWeakhands tries a low kick but MacDonald Jr avoids it.
MacDonald Jr avoids the body shot from McWeakhands.
MacDonald Jr throws a nice inside leg kick.
MacDonald Jr digs a good hook to McWeakhands's body.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
McWeakhands misses with a low kick.
MacDonald Jr tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
A leg kick checked by McWeakhands.
McWeakhands throws a nice looking combination but MacDonald Jr bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
MacDonald Jr scores with a jab to the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Hack MacDonald Jr dominated that second round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action! Let's get this one finished - here comes the final round!
MacDonald Jr wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
McWeakhands misses with a jab, cross combination.
MacDonald Jr feints with a shoulder and throws a nice leg kick to McWeakhands's calf.
MacDonald Jr lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!
MacDonald Jr lands with a cross to side of his opponent's head.
McWeakhands throws a leg kick but MacDonald Jr moved away.
MacDonald Jr throws a feint and then finishes with a kick to the body.
McWeakhands misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from MacDonald Jr.
McWeakhands digs a good body shot into MacDonald Jr's ribs.
The crowd cheers as McWeakhands lands an impressive looking overhand right. MacDonald Jr doesn't seem phased though.
McWeakhands misses with an uppercut. MacDonald Jr saw that one coming.
McWeakhands throws a chopping leg kick but MacDonald Jr manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
MacDonald Jr scores with a nice right hand.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from MacDonald Jr lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and McWeakhands has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from McWeakhands and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
MacDonald Jr swings away with a leg kick that misses.
MacDonald Jr tests McWeakhands's chin there with a solid looking shot.
McWeakhands avoids the head kick by MacDonald Jr.
MacDonald Jr throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
McWeakhands lets the fists fly and connects with a left straight followed by a right hook.
McWeakhands ducks down and throws a hook to the body but MacDonald Jr moves away.
MacDonald Jr avoids a low kick by using good footwork.
MacDonald Jr has his front leg slapped to the side - a nice low kick landing there from McWeakhands.
McWeakhands wants to land a leg kick but MacDonald Jr is out of range.
McWeakhands throws a head kick that misses
and MacDonald Jr counters with a nice low kick that buckles McWeakhands's knee momentarily.
McWeakhands takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
McWeakhands misses with a hook. MacDonald Jr ducked under it nicely.
McWeakhands connects with a body shot.
MacDonald Jr scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
McWeakhands's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
McWeakhands throws a right and a left that MacDonald Jr avoids nicely.
MacDonald Jr looks to land a left hand but McWeakhands moved out of range nicely.
Dumbass McWeakhands has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
MacDonald Jr takes a shot right to the bread basket.
McWeakhands throws a solid leg kick but MacDonald Jr takes the impact on his shin and smiles at McWeakhands.
MacDonald Jr steps to the side to avoid the strikes from McWeakhands.
MacDonald Jr throws a mid kick that lands with a slap.
MacDonald Jr throws a chopping leg kick but McWeakhands manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
MacDonald Jr really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
MacDonald Jr lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr swings wildly with a hook that is half blocked by McWeakhands.
McWeakhands closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so.
McWeakhands throws a sloppy body shot
and MacDonald Jr counters with a nice body shot.
MacDonald Jr cracks the inside of McWeakhands's front leg.
MacDonald Jr jabs at McWeakhands's body.
MacDonald Jr throws a quick inside leg kick.
McWeakhands takes a head kick and shrugs it off.
McWeakhands throws a hook but MacDonald Jr blocks it.
McWeakhands has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
MacDonald Jr defending well as McWeakhands loads up on a big left hand.
MacDonald Jr throws a quick head kick that skims the top of McWeakhands's head.
MacDonald Jr is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
MacDonald Jr lands a nice leg kick that just misses McWeakhands's sensitive parts.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
McWeakhands throws a right hand that misses
and MacDonald Jr counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Hack MacDonald Jr is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
MacDonald Jr lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
MacDonald Jr throws a nice head kick!
McWeakhands lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
McWeakhands misses with a leg kick
letting MacDonald Jr counter with a right hand.
MacDonald Jr turns his hip over beautifully as he lands a nice leg kick.
MacDonald Jr has a nice red mark on his side after a thudding body kick by McWeakhands.
McWeakhands lands a jab-cross combination.
MacDonald Jr feints and then cracks McWeakhands's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow McWeakhands down.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
MacDonald Jr with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
McWeakhands tries a low kick but MacDonald Jr avoids it.
McWeakhands takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
And that's the end of the fight!
Hack MacDonald Jr showed his dominance in that final round.
Well MacDonald Jr has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Alan Glass scores the fight 30:27
Judge Wesley Smith scores the fight 30:27
Judge Tiny Johnson scores the fight 30:27
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Hack MacDonald Jr!
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
76% |
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