PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Mel Turd (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jamal Kilgore (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Kilgore has chosen Champion by Chipmunk ft. Chris Brown as his entrance music. Jamal Kilgore is the more experienced fighter, so let's see if that makes a difference tonight.

Turd
vs
Kilgore

189 cm
25
205 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

190 cm
19
210 lbs
0 - 2 - 0

Good wrestling
Counter striker
KO power

BJJ Blue Belt
Decent boxing
Heavy handed

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of New York, Mel Turd!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Jamal Kilgore!
The judges for this bout are Russell Pearce, Lou da Vinci and Anthony Taglia.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Kilgore misses with a low kick.
Turd fails to land the takedown.
Kilgore dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Kilgore lunges in with an uppercut that skims his opponent's chin.
Turd takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Kilgore lands with an overhand left.

Turd darts in and lands a nice takedown into half guard.
We've had a lack of effective grappling in the last minute or so, which could well see a referee standup.
Turd takes a deep breath and rests his weight momentarily on top of his opponent, to control the position.
Turd stops Kilgore from getting back to his feet.
Turd trying to mount his opponent but Kilgore defends it.
Kilgore is trying to get back to full guard.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Turd not doing much here.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Turd has controlled the position for a good 20 seconds, which will no doubt be starting to frustrate his opponent.

Mel Turd has forced the referee to step in and bring the fight back to the feet.
Kilgore lands a nice shot that snaps Turd's head back.
Kilgore works Turd's body with a nice hook.
Kilgore connects with the punch.

A momentary lapse in concentration from Kilgore enables Turd to shoot in and score with a neat double leg. Kilgore manages to secure a closed guard as the fighters hit the mat.
Kilgore is trying to control the position but Turd postures up.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Turd is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.
Turd trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
Kilgore being controlled here, momentarily.
Turd stops Kilgore from standing up.

The referee has ruled that neither fighter is active enough on the ground and has stood them back up.
Turd takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
This has been an exciting period of action!
A cross from Kilgore lands.
Turd misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Turd moves forwards but Kilgore connects with a nice, crisp jab.

Turd closes the distance and pushes Kilgore back into the cage.
Kilgore is trying to work for a single leg takedown but Turd pulls him back up using the underhooks.

Turd turns his back and goes for a hip toss. It's a bit messy but it gets the job done and Turd manages to end up in side control.
Turd is staying tight to Kilgore's torso, preventing him from escaping.
Turd is working Kilgore over with some ground and pound from side control.
Kilgore being controlled for a moment.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The strikes coming from Turd are missing the target in this wave of attacks.
Turd controls the position from side control.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Turd prevents Kilgore from escaping the position.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Mel Turd dominated that round.
That's time! Turd's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Kilgore darts in and out, connecting with a jab.
Turd takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Turd takes one to the side of the head.
Turd tries to move into range but Kilgore moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
Nice shot by Kilgore.
Turd takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
Nice shot by Kilgore.
Turd tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Kilgore manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Turd drops his hands and takes a jab to the jaw for his troubles.
Kilgore catches Turd with a nice straight right. He seems pissed - ooooh, it's on now! On like donkey kong!
Turd's hands are dropping dangerously low here and Kilgore connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! Turd scrambles back to his feet.
Good standup being displayed there by Kilgore as he connects with a hook.
This has been an exciting period of action!
A combination from Turd does no damage.
Jamal Kilgore seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Kilgore scores with a nice strike.

Turd fakes an overhand right and shoots for a takedown. Kilgore sprawls well initially but Turd persists and gets the takedown into half guard.

That's one minute gone in the round.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
Kilgore avoiding damage under a succession of punches from Turd.
Turd is figuring out what he wants to do next.
Turd lands with a punch from half guard.
Turd looks to land a strike but Kilgore avoids it nicely and regains full guard.
Turd controlling from the guard. I say controlling but really, he's stalling.
Kilgore controls Turd momentarily but Turd frees himself.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Turd works a leg free and moves into half guard.
Neither fighter is being very active at the moment, with Turd in particular looking to stall.

Turd is sneakily working for an arm triangle but Kilgore sees it coming and defends easily.
Turd working the head and body with strikes.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Kilgore wants to control but Turd is keeping busy and won't allow it.
Turd takes a deep breath and rests his weight momentarily on top of his opponent, to control the position.

Turd looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.
Turd wants to free his trapped foot but Kilgore is holding on for dear life with his legs.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Turd controlling the action here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
We may be looking at a referee standup if the pace doesn't pick up soon.
Turd's ground tactics aren't going to win him many fans. Let's hope he's got fireworks for us if he gets back to his feet because he's not doing much on the ground.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.

Mel Turd has forced the referee to step in and bring the fight back to the feet.
Kilgore lands a straight punch to the body, keeping Turd at a distance.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Mel Turd dominated that second round.
That's time! Turd's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. This is the final round!

Kilgore scores with a jab.
Jamal Kilgore seems to be getting the better of the standup.

Turd shoots in and scores a nice double leg takedown into half guard.
Turd is just sitting in half guard, waiting for something to happen.

Kilgore is defending against the submission attempts here by Turd.
Kilgore has hold of Turd's hands but Turd slips his arm to the side and lands an elbow.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Turd wants to advance to full mount but Kilgore doesn't think that's going to happen and regains full guard instead.
Turd sitting in guard here, content to control.
Mel Turd overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Turd throws a big right hand that misses.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Turd trying to control but Kilgore is working from the bottom.
Turd sitting in guard, not really doing much.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

We're going to have a standup here because Mel Turd wasn't active enough for the referee's liking.
Kilgore throws a low kick, looking for Turd's leg but Turd calmly moves out of range.
No luck for Turd with that takedown attempt.
Kilgore slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
Turd shoots in looking for a takedown. Kilgore tries to sprawl out of it but Turd keeps driving through. The fighters are pinned against the cage. Kilgore manages to get underhooks and after a bit of a struggle, circles away and we're back to standing.

Turd moves into the clinch.
Kilgore is working on a leg, looking for a takedown but Turd is defending well.

Turd lands a takedown into guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Kilgore wants to get back to his feet but he's too absorbed in his own little project and Turd manages to pass to side control.
Turd slows the pace down in half guard.
Turd is looking to advance position but Kilgore won't allow it.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Turd is just sitting in half guard, waiting for something to happen.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up, due to lack of activity on the part of Mel Turd.
Turd is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Jamal Kilgore has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Mel Turd is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.

Turd shoots in with a lovely double leg takedown. Kilgore manages to land in full guard to minimise the damage.

And that's the end of the fight!
Mel Turd showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Turd, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Russell Pearce scores the fight 30:27
Judge Lou da Vinci scores the fight 30:27
Judge Anthony Taglia scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Mel Turd!