PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Nope Chuck Testa (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Turd Fergerson (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chuck Testa comes to the cage accompanied by Nope Chuck Testa. These two fighters really are very evenly matched on the feet - it will be fascinating to see who can assert themselves in that aspect of the fight.

Chuck Testa
vs
Fergerson

220 cm
23
185 lbs
1 - 3 - 0

172 cm
22
176 lbs
2 - 5 - 0

Decent wrestler
Solid boxing
Self confident

BJJ Blue Belt
Good kicks
Solid chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 1 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Nope Chuck Testa!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 2 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Turd Fergerson!
The judges for this bout are Steve Erwin, John Mangel and Eliza Hachem.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
A left and a right from Chuck Testa both land. Nice combination.
Fergerson throws a sloppy head kick and Chuck Testa moves out of range easily.
Fergerson takes a shot right to the bread basket.

Chuck Testa shoots in for a takedown and gets it.
The referee claps his hands together and tells the fighters to work.
Fergerson avoiding damage under a succession of punches from Chuck Testa.
Chuck Testa is pressing down on Fergerson's thigh, looking to free his foot. Fergerson is holding on for now.
Chuck Testa not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Fergerson is looking to improve his position.
Nice strikes from Chuck Testa there.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Chuck Testa throws a big elbow that misses, also allowing Fergerson to regain full guard.
Fergerson utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Chuck Testa really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
Chuck Testa throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as Fergerson works some decent striking defense from the bottom.
Hammerfist, elbow! yells Chuck Testa's corner. There ya go! There ya go!
Chuck Testa postures up and lands some nice ground and pound.
Fergerson is trying to stand up but he's not managed so far.
Chuck Testa trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
Chuck Testa throws a big elbow that misses.
Chuck Testa with a flurry of punches that miss.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Chuck Testa preventing the sweep.
Chuck Testa will need to keep those long limbs tucked in whilst he's on the ground, to prevent any submissions.
Fergerson trying to punch from his back but it's not doing any damage.
Chuck Testa connects with a couple of short punches.
Chuck Testa looking to pass the guard.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Chuck Testa throws a strike but Fergerson rolls with it and manages to sweep. Now he's in guard on top.

Chuck Testa wriggles free and stands up.
Chuck Testa misses with a double jab.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Chuck Testa scores with a crisp jab that stopped Fergerson in his tracks.
Chuck Testa blocks a head kick by Fergerson.
Fergerson misses with a head kick.
Chuck Testa shuffles to his left behind two crisp jabs. Fergerson eats them both and turns towards Chuck Testa to reposition himself and eats a stinging right hand-left hook combo.

It looks like Turd Fergerson has been cut.
Chuck Testa lands a jab to Fergerson's midsection.
Nice straight punches there by Chuck Testa. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Chuck Testa.
Chuck Testa throws a series of punches but Fergerson avoids them all with ease.
Fergerson misses with a head kick.
Chuck Testa digs a good body shot into Fergerson's ribs.
Fergerson looks gassed!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Chuck Testa misses with a two punch combination.
Chuck Testa moves into range and connects with a jab.
Chuck Testa scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Fergerson tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Fergerson takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
Turd Fergerson seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Fergerson is looking to take this fight into the clinch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Chuck Testa tries to bum rush Fergerson with a series of wild strikes but Fergerson uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Fergerson is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Chuck Testa scores with a jab to the head.
Chuck Testa lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!
A head kick misses from Fergerson.
Chuck Testa goes to the watering hole and comes back with a big thumbs up from the judges as he scores a three punch combo.
Fergerson pushes forward with a 1-2 combination that forces Chuck Testa back to the cage. Fergerson follows up with a solid lead hook to the liver.

Chuck Testa scores with a takedown into Fergerson's guard.
Chuck Testa lands a couple of elbows.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Chuck Testa postures up and scores with a shot to the body and a follow up elbow to the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Nope Chuck Testa dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Turd Fergerson's cut.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

Sloppy strikes from Chuck Testa. Those never looked like landing.
Chuck Testa throws a nice looking combination but Fergerson bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Chuck Testa scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Fergerson throws a head kick that misses.
Fergerson throws a right and a left that Chuck Testa avoids nicely.
Chuck Testa scores with a crisp jab that stopped Fergerson in his tracks.
Chuck Testa scores with a jab to the body.
Chuck Testa dips to his left and cracks Fergerson with an uppercut!
Sloppy strikes from Fergerson. Those never looked like landing.
A jab from Chuck Testa does it's job there.
Fergerson misses with a jab, cross combination.
Fergerson falls off balance throwing a combination
and Chuck Testa counters with a left and a right that stings Fergerson.
Fergerson is breathing heavily.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Fergerson tries a head kick but it misses.
Chuck Testa misses with a wild combination.
Fergerson fails with an attempt to clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Fergerson is looking to clinch but Chuck Testa is avoiding it.
Chuck Testa lands a jab, followed by a cross and another cross, as Fergerson backs up against the cage.

That has opened up Turd Fergerson's cut even more.
Fergerson wants to clinch but Chuck Testa slips to the side
and Chuck Testa counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps Fergerson thinking.
Chuck Testa lands with a nice combination. Fergerson backs away looking to recover.
Chuck Testa throws a shot to the body.
Chuck Testa works over Fergerson's head and body with a nice combination.
Chuck Testa looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Nope Chuck Testa is winning the standup battle so far.
A cross from Chuck Testa lands.

Fergerson gets caught on his heels momentarily as he allows Chuck Testa to score an easy takedown into full guard.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Chuck Testa won't allow Fergerson to get back to his feet.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Chuck Testa advances to half guard.
Chuck Testa looks towards his corner to check for any instructions. The corner give him nothing to work with, so he cracks Fergerson with a short hammerfist. I guess that's as good as any advice he could get in this position.
Fergerson is trying to defend against the ground and pound but Chuck Testa scores with a couple of nice shots.
The two fighters exchange a few words. I couldn't hear what they were saying but maybe it's more fun if you make it up yourself. Chuck Testa connects with a nice short shot to Fergerson's temple.
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. Chuck Testa lands a nice short elbow.
Fergerson taking some punishment here, with Chuck Testa in his half guard.
Chuck Testa working over Fergerson with some ground and pound. Fergerson looks like he wants out of this position, which is understandable.
Chuck Testa sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Fergerson defending well though.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Fergerson wants to control but Chuck Testa passes into side.
Chuck Testa is working Fergerson over with some ground and pound from side control.
Chuck Testa working the head with strikes.
Chuck Testa is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Fergerson can do to turn this around?
Chuck Testa in side control lands a nice looking series of punches and elbows.
Fergerson is trying to control Chuck Testa's posture but Chuck Testa avoids it.
Chuck Testa lands an elbow.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Chuck Testa working the ground and pound.

The cut above Turd Fergerson's eye is starting to cause him problems now.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Fergerson takes a nasty elbow to the side of the head.
Fergerson on the wrong end of some ground and pound.
Chuck Testa cracks Fergerson with a big right hand but Fergerson just smiles back at him and invites him to have another go.
Chuck Testa in side control lands a nice looking series of punches and elbows.

Turd Fergerson's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Turd Fergerson's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:46 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Nope Chuck Testa!
Nope Chuck Testa seemed lost for words in his post fight interview but he remembered to thank his fans and directed everyone to his website.