|
|
PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Vladimir Zhirinovsky (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Armando Quetzalcoatl (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Zhirinovsky comes into the arena with Zhirinovsky and Serega - Murka blaring out of the sound system. Quetzalcoatl has chosen J-Lo : On the Floor as his entrance music. Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!
 |
|
 |
| 180 cm
26
218 lbs
13 - 9 - 0 |
|
202 cm
22
279 lbs
8 - 3 - 0 |
Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Insanely flexible |
|
BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent MT
Powerful |
|
| |
|
Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
13 - 9 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Vladimir Zhirinovsky!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
8 - 3 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Armando Quetzalcoatl!
The judges for this bout are Viktor Lagutenko, Fedor Mirinova and Sergei Dronov.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Quetzalcoatl doesn't manage to clinch there - Zhirinovsky circles away.
Zhirinovsky shoots in looking for a takedown but Quetzalcoatl manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Zhirinovsky's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Zhirinovsky drops down and drives through with a powerful takedown into guard.
The referee claps his hands together and tells the fighters to work.
Zhirinovsky controls the pace of the fight for a moment.
We get told so often about how wrestlers don't like to be on their backs. Let's see if Quetzalcoatl can do anything to dispel that myth.
Zhirinovsky trying to control but Quetzalcoatl is working from the bottom.
The fighters are trapped in the ropes so we're going to have a reposition here. The ref calls for a break and repositions the fighters in the center of the ring.
Quetzalcoatl wants to get back to his feet but Zhirinovsky is in a dominant position and won't allow it.
Zhirinovsky drops back looking for a leg! Quetzalcoatl is in trouble here! The fighters roll with the hold and Quetzalcoatl manages to kick Zhirinovsky off! Zhirinovsky jumps back into Quetzalcoatl's guard.
The fighters are tangled up in the ropes here. We might need a restart if the fighters can't break free themselves.
Quetzalcoatl utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Zhirinovsky stops Quetzalcoatl from standing up.
Zhirinovsky is working Quetzalcoatl over from the guard. He should look to pass the guard and do a little more damage with these strikes.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Quetzalcoatl wants to stand and escape but Zhirinovsky is having none of it.
Zhirinovsky sneaks a leg through and gets to half guard. That was like a knife through butter how easily he passed Quetzalcoatl's guard.
Quetzalcoatl wants to get back to his feet.
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. Zhirinovsky lands a nice short elbow.
Zhirinovsky trying to control from half guard but Quetzalcoatl is working away.
Quetzalcoatl is pushing off trying to get to his feet. Zhirinovsky has hold of the leg though and he's dropped back for a heel hook… has he got it?? YES! Quetzalcoatl is tapping! This fight is all over!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:37 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (Heel Hook). Vladimir Zhirinovsky!
Our winner, Vladimir Zhirinovsky, made sure he spent some time buttering up the crowd during his post fight interview, which will no doubt bring him a few more fans.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
|
S |
C |
G |
|
energy
A | B |
|
hype
A | B |
|
pop
A | B |
|
mgr
A | B |
|
FIGHT
RATING
45% |
|
|
|
|
|
|
