PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a middleweight MMA rules bout between Squirtle Blastoise (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Adam Carolla (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Blastoise might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to The Rolling Stones: Sympathy For The Devil. Carolla has chosen Gotta Get It On from Taboo 2 as his entrance music. Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Blastoise
vs
Carolla

192 cm
29
200 lbs
8 - 3 - 0

198 cm
36
201 lbs
37 - 28 - 0

BJJ Red Belt
Solid boxing
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

ACME-Blood Red Q158 Always $30 (5% Laundry SALE)
CEC Nutrition Q160

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the middleweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 8 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Squirtle Blastoise!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 37 - 28 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Adam Carolla!
The judges for this bout are Felipe Paraventi, Edson Gomes and Matheus Silva.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Carolla thows a body shot but no joy.
Blastoise shoots in looking for a takedown but Carolla manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Blastoise's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Blastoise throws a low kick, looking for Carolla's leg but Carolla calmly moves out of range.

Blastoise shoots in from a long way out. He's driving through with the takedown attempt and he eventually gets it, landing in Carolla's guard.
Carolla pulls Blastoise in close to prevent any damage.
Carolla working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Blastoise.
Blastoise in full guard, throwing the ground and pound. No damage this time.
Blastoise wants to pass the guard but Carolla is keeping the position.
Blastoise trying to control the position from guard on top but Carolla is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Carolla really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Blastoise. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Blastoise pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Carolla is keeping the position for now.
Blastoise trying to control but Carolla is working from the bottom.

Well, the referee has seen enough. Neither fighter is active enough on the ground so he's stood them back up.
Carolla swings and misses with a hook to the body.

Blastoise looking for a takedown here - he's got it.
Blastoise looking to pass the guard.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Blastoise slows down the pace of the fight, as he sits in guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Blastoise trying to control but Carolla is working from the bottom.
Carolla has control of Blastoise's left arm, preventing Blastoise from doing any damage.
Blastoise throwing strikes from guard but Carolla blocks nicely.
Blastoise missing there with some ground and pound from the guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Blastoise wants to control from the top but Carolla keeps moving.
It looks like the ref is thinking about a standup.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up.
Carolla is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Blastoise.
Blastoise is looking to score with low kicks.
Blastoise tries for a takedown but Carolla sees it coming a mile off and avoids it easily.
Carolla stuffs the takedown attempt from Blastoise. Blastoise gets slowly back to his feet.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Squirtle Blastoise. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Carolla cracks Blastoise with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd.
Blastoise is looking to score with low kicks.

Blastoise looking to shoot here. He's gone for it and he's landed a takedown into mount! Oh, that's bad for Carolla!
Blastoise prevents Carolla from getting the reversal.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Carolla holding onto his opponent's waist for dear life, as Blastoise tries to land some strikes to get him to release his grip.
Carolla holding onto his opponent's waist for dear life, as Blastoise tries to land some strikes to get him to release his grip.
Blastoise landing punches.
Blastoise looking to control but Carolla is working nicely, looking to advance position himself.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Blastoise sitting in mount, just looking to control for the moment.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Squirtle Blastoise dominated that round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

A big left from Carolla misses.
Blastoise thows a left - swing and a miss!
Carolla connects with the punch.
Carolla misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Blastoise ducks under a wild hook from Carolla.
Carolla moves into range and connects with a jab.
Carolla cracks Blastoise with an open hand slap.
Blastoise misses with a low kick.
Blastoise attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
Blastoise slips under a jab.
Blastoise shoots in for a takedown. "Ole!" shouts Carolla as he jumps to the side.
Blastoise dives in and grabs Carolla's left leg, looking for a takedown. Carolla pushes down on Blastoise's head and hops out.
Blastoise fakes high and shoots in for a takedown but Carolla avoids it really well and circles away.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Squirtle Blastoise. That's going to take a lot out of him.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Blastoise misses with an uppercut. Carolla saw that one coming.
Blastoise pivots, looking for a leg kick but Carolla is out of range and Blastoise settles back down.
Blastoise fails with a takedown attempt from distance.
Carolla stuffs the takedown.
Carolla lands a jab to the nose.
Jab by Carolla.
Blastoise fails to land the takedown.
Blastoise misses with a takedown attempt
and Carolla counters with a nice body shot.
Blastoise shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with Carolla but Carolla pushes him off and we're back to square one.
Blastoise moves forwards but Carolla connects with a nice, crisp jab.
Carolla misses with a double jab.
Carolla fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Carolla cracks Blastoise with a good jab.
Carolla fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Carolla misses with a wild combination.
Blastoise shoots for a double leg takedown but Carolla sprawls well. He's pushed Blastoise's face into the mat and manages to get back to his feet relatively easily.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Blastoise bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Blastoise is on the wrong end of a nice combination from Carolla.

Blastoise dives in and scores a takedown into Carolla's guard.
Blastoise is taking a break and basically stalling. The referee will not allow him to do that for long.
Blastoise slips nicely into half guard.
Blastoise is just sitting in half guard, waiting for something to happen.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Blastoise missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
Blastoise has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Blastoise is trying to control the action in half guard but Carolla is working away on the bottom, looking perhaps to get back to full guard.
Carolla has no desire to be mounted, so is trying to control. Blastoise is working away from the top position though.
Carolla taking some punishment here, with Blastoise in his half guard.

Blastoise looking for a submission but Carolla manages to get full guard, putting an end to that submission attempt.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Blastoise controlling from the guard. I say controlling but really, he's stalling.
Blastoise throws a strike but Carolla rolls with it and manages to sweep. Now he's in guard on top.
Carolla must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.
Blastoise controls Carolla momentarily but Carolla frees himself.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.

Blastoise is actively looking for submissions from his back. He's worked himself a little space on the bottom and seems to be going for a triangle. No, he's switched into an armbar! That was slick! Carolla rolls with it to try and escape but Blastoise cranks on the arm and Carolla is forced to tap out! This one is aaaaaaaaall over!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:59 of round 2, we have a winner by way of Submission (Armbar). Squirtle Blastoise!
Squirtle Blastoise thanked the fans post fight for their support.