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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Handsome Cpw (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ron Jeremy (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Cpw comes to the cage accompanied by Steve McQueen. Jeremy has chosen I'm sexy and I know it by LMFAO as his entrance music. Ron Jeremy has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?
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| 170 cm
33
146 lbs
35 - 19 - 0 |
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175 cm
33
145 lbs
24 - 13 - 0 |
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible |
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Good wrestler
Excellent MT
Fast |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
35 - 19 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Handsome Cpw!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
24 - 13 - 0, fighting out of London, Ron Jeremy!
The judges for this bout are James Ackerman, James Glass and Andrew Berry.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Cpw moves out of range of the body kick from Jeremy.
Jeremy throws a big shot that misses.
Handsome Cpw seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Cpw misses the jab.
Cpw misses with a wild body shot.
Jeremy looks to throw the jab but Cpw is out of range.
Cpw loads up on a big right hand but Jeremy slips the punch.
Jeremy swats away the attempt to clinch by Cpw.
Jeremy misses with a looping right.
A jab from Cpw does it's job there.
Jeremy scores with a hook.
The fighters circling - Jeremy throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Cpw has been working on his boxing with his coaches at gym closing in the buildup to the fight.
Cpw gets cracked with a nice right hand there by Jeremy.
Jeremy slips under a jab.
Cpw misses with an uppercut. Jeremy saw that one coming.
Cpw cracks Jeremy with a right hand to the side of the head.
Jeremy misses with a hook.
Cpw misses with a hook
and Jeremy counters with a nice kick to the body.
Thud! ouch! good body kick from Cpw - that will leave a mark!
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
A jab from Cpw misses.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Cpw swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Cpw digs a good hook to Jeremy's body.
Cpw lands a jab. Then a cross. Then finally a nice hook to the body. Good work there by Cpw.
Cpw is looking to clinch but Jeremy is avoiding it.
Jeremy lands a jab to Cpw's midsection.
Nice straight punches there by Cpw. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Cpw.
Jeremy clinches up against the cage.
Cpw blocking some punches.
Cpw blocks a body shot from Jeremy.
Cpw escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Cpw connects with a body shot.
Jeremy throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Cpw.
Cpw throws a big shot that misses.
Cpw swings for the body but Jeremy moves out of range.
Jeremy throws a lazy right hand but Cpw sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Cpw lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Jeremy swings wildly with a hook that is half blocked by Cpw.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Cpw looks to score with a jab to the body but Jeremy is just out of range.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Jeremy takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Cpw slips under a jab.
Cpw misses with a few strikes there.
Jeremy throws a head kick that misses.
Cpw lands with a good body shot.
Cpw lands with a hook. Jeremy tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.
Cpw scores with a jab to the jaw of his opponent.
Jeremy rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Cpw moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Jeremy ducks under a wild hook from Cpw.
Cpw uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Jeremy.
Jeremy throws a looping overhand right but Cpw ducks down to avoid it.
Cpw scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
Jeremy avoids the body shot from Cpw.
Jeremy blocks a jab.
Jeremy fakes the leg kick and cracks Cpw in the body.
Cpw misses the shot to the body.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy swinging wildly here.
Jeremy takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Cpw tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Jeremy manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Cpw keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Jeremy.
Cpw lands a slapping body shot.
Cpw connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Jeremy lands a nice looking body shot.
Nice uppercut lands for Cpw. That snapped Jeremy's head back.
Nice body punch from Cpw.
Jeremy takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Cpw tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Jeremy was well out of range. Poor timing from Cpw.
Cpw scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
Jeremy goes for a high kick. It partially lands.
Jeremy misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Cpw bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Jeremy's head.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Cpw slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
A big right from Jeremy misses.
Jeremy scores with a hook.
Cpw ducks under a wild hook from Jeremy.
Cpw jabs Jeremy to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Cpw looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
Cpw misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Jeremy connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
A punch lands to the side of Cpw 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Good exchange - Cpw coming out on top.
Cpw misses with a shot to the body
and Jeremy cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Cpw scores with a hook to the body. Jeremy takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
Nice cross by Cpw.
Jeremy fails with a takedown attempt.
Jeremy keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Cpw tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Jeremy was well out of range. Poor timing from Cpw.
Cpw misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Jeremy counters with a three punch combo that has Cpw backing up. Cpw nods at Jeremy to acknowledge the strikes.
Jeremy uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Cpw.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Handsome Cpw dominated that round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.
Jeremy takes a swing at Cpw's ribcage but misses.
Cpw swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Cpw digs a good body shot into Jeremy's ribs.
Jeremy lands with a cross.
Jeremy jabs away that one connects to the head of his opponent.
Cpw throws an overhand right that lands on Jeremy's shoulder, as Jeremy tries to avoid the shot.
Jeremy slips a straight right by Cpw.
Cpw ducks down and throws a hook to the body.
Cpw connects with a looping right hand.
Cpw slips a straight right by Jeremy.
Cpw swings for the body but Jeremy moves out of range.
Cpw fakes a head punch and goes low to the body. Nicely done.
A punch combination from Cpw misses.
Jeremy takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Jeremy moves away from the strike by Cpw.
Cpw throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Jeremy throws the left hand but Cpw avoids the punch easily.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Cpw throws a big shot that misses.
Jeremy keeping at a good range here, avoiding a leg kick.
Jeremy moves away from the strike by Cpw.
A nice combination there by Cpw.
Jeremy just misses with a punch to the body.
Nice uppercut lands for Jeremy. That snapped Cpw's head back.
Jeremy avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Cpw looks to land a right hand but Jeremy moved out of range.
Jeremy throws a half hearted mid kick.
Jeremy throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Cpw lands with an uppercut that bounces Jeremy off the cage and back into range.
Cpw jabs at Jeremy's body.
Handsome Cpw is winning the standup battle so far.
Cpw throws a body punch but Jeremy moves out of range.
Thud! ouch! good body kick from Jeremy - that will leave a mark!
Cpw throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Jeremy will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Jeremy throws a push kick but Cpw slaps the foot to one side.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy scores with a head kick.
Cpw throws a hook but Jeremy blocks it.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
A punch combination from Cpw misses.
Jeremy lands a nice shot to the body.
Jeremy waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Cpw.
Cpw tries to clinch but Jeremy moves away
and Jeremy counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Jeremy walks into a jab.
Cpw scores with the left hand. Jeremy knows he should have avoided that one.
Jeremy misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Cpw just misses with a punch to the body.
Cpw misses with a wild combination.
Jeremy looks to score with a jab to the body but Cpw is just out of range.
The fighters are going at a pretty good pace and they're both starting to sweat now.
Cpw cracks Jeremy with a good jab.
Cpw bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Jeremy's head.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy thows a left - swing and a miss!
Jeremy rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Cpw counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Jeremy has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
Cpw misses with a jab, cross combination.
Cpw throws a shot to the body.
Cpw missing with a left hand there. Jeremy was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Cpw throws a quick head kick that skims the top of Jeremy's head.
Jeremy uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Cpw.
Jeremy moves out of range as Cpw strikes.
Cpw takes one to the chin there.
Jeremy cracks the inside of Cpw's front leg.
Jeremy throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Jeremy wants to clinch
enabling Cpw to counter with a crisp jab.
Cpw ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Jeremy moves away.
Jeremy moves out of range of the leg kick from Cpw.
Cpw fakes a head punch and goes low to the body. Nicely done.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy thows a body shot but no joy.
Jeremy tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Cpw throws an overhand right that lands on Jeremy's shoulder, as Jeremy tries to avoid the shot.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Cpw pivots, looking for a leg kick but Jeremy is out of range and Cpw settles back down.
Jeremy slips under a jab.
Jeremy ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Jeremy misses with a hook.
Cpw takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Cpw loads up on a big right hand but Jeremy slips the punch.
Cpw rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Jeremy moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Cpw lands a head shot.
Jeremy throws a shot from downtown. Cpw moves away and avoids it.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Jeremy sees a low kick coming and goes to check it, but it's actually a body kick and it thuds into his unprotected ribs.
Jeremy loads up on a big right hand but Cpw slips the punch.
Jeremy throws a right and a left that Cpw avoids nicely.
Jeremy throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Handsome Cpw dominated that second round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business. This is the final round!
Cpw scores with a slapping inside leg kick.
Jeremy dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
A decent looking body kick lands there for Jeremy.
Jeremy throws a right hand that misses
and Cpw counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body.
Jeremy moves into the clinch.
Jeremy has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by Cpw after a bit of a struggle.
Cpw scores with an uppercut up the middle.
Cpw breaks the clinch.
Cpw ducks down and throws a hook to the body.
Jeremy misses with a hook. Cpw ducked under it nicely.
Cpw dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Jeremy. That did some damage!
Jeremy scores with a crisp jab that stopped Cpw in his tracks.
Cpw lands a jab-cross combination.
Cpw misses with a looping left.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Cpw misses with a double jab.
Cpw tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Jeremy was well out of range. Poor timing from Cpw.
Cpw slips under a jab from Jeremy.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Jeremy misses with a looping left.
Jeremy looks for a takedown here. Will he get it? Cpw is fending him off so far but Jeremy persists. Nope, Cpw circles away and we're back to standing.
Cpw throws an overhand right that lands on Jeremy's shoulder, as Jeremy tries to avoid the shot.
Jeremy throws a head kick that half lands.
Jeremy takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Nice body punch from Cpw.
Cpw throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Cpw getting the better of the striking in that exchange.
Jeremy fails with a takedown attempt.
Handsome Cpw has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Ron Jeremy.
Cpw scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Cpw slips under a jab from Jeremy.
Cpw lands a jab to the head.
Cpw lands an overhand right.
Jeremy connects with a lovely jab that went straight through the gap between Cpw's hands.
Cpw misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Jeremy.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Cpw bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Jeremy's head backwards.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Jeremy misses with a left hand
and Cpw counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Cpw lands with a thumping leg kick.
Cpw fakes low and throws an overhand right that catches Jeremy on the side of the head.
Jeremy takes one to the side of the head.
A telegraphed right hand from Cpw misses the target.
Cpw rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Jeremy moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Jeremy takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.
Cpw digs a good hook to Jeremy's body.
Cpw throws a good cross that connects.
Jeremy takes one on the chin but seems OK.
Cpw slips under a jab from Jeremy.
A big left from Cpw misses.
A head kick misses from Jeremy.
Cpw lands a powerful looking uppercut that connected with his opponent's jaw.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Jeremy slips a jab from Cpw.
Cpw with a jab.
Cpw looks to score with a jab to the body but Jeremy is just out of range.
Jeremy fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Cpw manages to avoid it.
Cpw takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Cpw bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Jeremy's head backwards.
Jeremy misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
A looping hook to the body misses from Cpw. Jeremy does a little dance to reset his feet.
Jeremy takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
Cpw just misses with a punch to the body.
Jeremy staying out of range there.
Jeremy slips a jab from Cpw.
Cpw clobbers Jeremy with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Jeremy is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Jeremy throws a solid leg kick but Cpw takes the impact on his shin and smiles at Jeremy.
Ron Jeremy has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Cpw stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush.
Jeremy tries to land a front kick but Cpw steps back. That was a bit too telegraphed.
Cpw jabs at Jeremy's body.
Cpw walks forward, straight into a front kick from Jeremy.
Cpw throws a series of strikes that have Jeremy backpedaling.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Cpw steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from Jeremy. That one must have hurt.
Handsome Cpw is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Jeremy jabs Cpw right on the nose. Cpw blinks but takes it well.
Cpw lands a really nice looking cross but Jeremy seems unphased.
Jeremy throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Cpw makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
Jeremy jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Cpw bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Cpw missing with a left hand there. Jeremy was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Jeremy waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Cpw.
Jeremy throws a looping overhand right but Cpw ducks down to avoid it.
Cpw avoids the head kick by Jeremy.
And that's the end of the fight!
Handsome Cpw showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Cpw, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge James Ackerman scores the fight 30:27
Judge James Glass scores the fight 30:27
Judge Andrew Berry scores the fight 30:27
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Handsome Cpw!
An out of breath and clearly excited Handsome Cpw thanked Namunamu Clothing for their help and support (and free stuff they sent him).
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
97% |
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