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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Yormomza Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ross Kemp (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). This should be fireworks!
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225 cm
21
281 lbs
10 - 1 - 1 |
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190 cm
20
269 lbs
1 - 0 - 0 |
Excellent MT
Insanely flexible
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Decent boxing
Good gas tank
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division. Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner. With a record of
10 - 1 - 1, fighting out of Las Vegas, Yormomza Thundercunt! And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner. With a record of
1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of London, Ross Kemp! The judges for this bout are Trevor Gratis, Elvis Blanc and Robert Douchet.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway! Kemp closes the distance and clinches. Kemp misses with some punches.
Thundercunt doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Thundercunt misses with a punch to the body.
Kemp lands a body punch. Thundercunt misses with a short punch on the inside. Kemp blocking some punches.
Thundercunt blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Kemp pushes Thundercunt back against the ropes and lands a hook to the side of the head. An uppercut to the body lands inside from Thundercunt. Thundercunt tries to throw a body punch but Kemp avoids it by throwing Thundercunt back against the ropes. Kemp tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Thundercunt's elbow. A head punch on the inside from Thundercunt fails to land. Kemp blocking some punches.
Thundercunt blocking some punches.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up. Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Kemp uses good head movement to avoid it. Thundercunt lands with a right to the head. Thundercunt swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Kemp throws a punch but it's blocked by Thundercunt. Kemp fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
A left hand lands to the body for Kemp.
That's one minute gone in the round. Kemp doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Thundercunt blocks an uppercut.
Thundercunt blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
With the fighters clinched against the ropes, Kemp creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut. Kemp lands with a right to the head. Thundercunt really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape. Kemp misses with a hook to the ribs.
Kemp working aggressively here.
Thundercunt lands a body punch. Kemp blocking some punches.
Kemp working some nice short punches in the clinch.
It looks like Yormomza Thundercunt has been cut. Thundercunt blocks a body shot from Kemp. Kemp blocks a punch to the side of the head.
I was talking to Thundercunt's coach per-fight and he was telling me that they'd been working on the clinch in the runup to this fight. Kemp lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Thundercunt backwards. Kemp tries to throw a body punch but Thundercunt avoids it by throwing Kemp back against the ropes. Thundercunt throws a head punch that misses. Thundercunt misses with some punches.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Kemp. Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Kemp breaks the clinch.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Thundercunt comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range. The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here. Thundercunt looks to score with a jab to the body but Kemp is just out of range. Thundercunt gets tackled into the ropes by Kemp. Kemp maintains the clinch. Kemp lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage. Kemp struggles to land a body shot inside as Thundercunt controls his hands.
Kemp blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Thundercunt fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Thundercunt misses with a short punch on the inside. A nice left hand lands by Thundercunt.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Kemp lands a hook that snaps the head of Thundercunt backwards. Kemp lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the ropes. Kemp scores with an uppercut up the middle. Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Kemp working aggressively here.
Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch. Kemp blocking some punches.
Kemp throws a punch but it's blocked by Thundercunt. Thundercunt lands with a right to the head.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Kemp has a couple of punches blocked by Thundercunt.
Kemp blocking some punches.
Kemp presses Thundercunt against the ropes and delivers a mid-strength body shot. An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Thundercunt. Kemp blocking some punches.
Thundercunt lands a body punch - he's looking to wear down Kemp. A right hand to the body from Kemp.
Thundercunt blocks an uppercut.
Kemp throws a head punch that misses. Kemp's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does. Some wild striking there from Kemp.
Thundercunt pushing out the jab but it's not landing. Kemp scores with a jab to the body. Thundercunt instigates a clinch. Thundercunt tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage. A head punch on the inside from Thundercunt fails to land. Kemp swings away with an uppercut that misses.
That's four minutes gone in the round. Thundercunt is working Kemp over against the ropes. Kemp lands a left hand that snaps the head of Thundercunt backwards. Kemp lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage. We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out! A short left from Kemp. Kemp prevents a body shot from Thundercunt. Thundercunt throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Kemps head. Thundercunt throws a head punch that misses. An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Thundercunt. A head punch blocked on the inside by Kemp. Kemp misses with a body punch.
The fighters are starting to perspire pretty heavily. An uppercut to the body lands inside from Kemp. Kemp blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Kemp misses with a punch on the inside.
Kemp blocks an uppercut.
Kemp throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges. Thundercunt is breathing heavily. A short right from Thundercunt on the inside. Kemp makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut. Kemp pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat. The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end. Kemp bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Ross Kemp dominated that round. The cut man is working on Yormomza Thundercunt's cut. The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!
A jab from Kemp misses. A swing and a miss from Thundercunt. Kemp throws out a counter right but Thundercunt avoids it with no problem. Thundercunt looks to throw the jab but Kemp is out of range. Thundercunt swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Thundercunt throws a right hand that misses
and Kemp moves into the clinch. Kemp lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Thundercunt or not. Kemp working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely. Ross Kemp seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far. Kemp fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Kemp swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Thundercunt throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Kemps head. Kemp lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Kemp creates a bit of space and cracks Thundercunt with an uppercut that drops him to the canvas! Thundercunt is wobbled and seems to be struggling to get back to his feet. 3,4,5. He's up! Phew, his manager will be relieved but they're no doubt wondering whether he'll be able to recover properly and get back in the fight!
Thundercunt is rocked! Kemp has been the more effective fighter overall so far. Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show! Kemp lands with a nice body punch. Oh Thundercunt is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!! Kemp looks to score with a combo but nothing lands. Kemp looks to land a right hand but Thundercunt moved out of range. An attempted straight right counter from Thundercunt misses the target. Thundercunt seems to have got his legs back now. Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here. Kemp misses with a left hand and Thundercunt counters with a stiff right hand. Kemp scores with a jab to the body. Kemp has closed the distance and engaged Thundercunt in a clinch.
That's one minute gone in the round. Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch. Kemp misses with the head strike.
Kemp misses with a hook from the clinch. A right hand to the body from Kemp.
A short body shot lands from Kemp as the two fighters clinch.
Kemp lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage. Kemp working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely. Kemp misses with a short punch on the inside. A nice left hand lands by Kemp.
Kemp lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage. Kemp breaks the clinch momentarily and cracks Thundercunt with a big right hook that drops him to the canvas! Thundercunt looks like he might be in big trouble here! The referee has started the count straight away and we're up to 5 already. Thundercunt get to one knee - can he make it back to his feet? No, he's flopped back to the mat - he's out - this one is all over!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:43 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Punch). Ross Kemp! An out of breath Ross Kemp thanked his loyal fans in his post fight interview, giving them credit for his success over the course of his career.
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S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
68% |
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