PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Biff Raper (ranked 103 p4p, 12 weight class) and Umberto Turturro (ranked 941 p4p, 118 weight class). Raper comes into the arena with Torso fuck - Raped by Elephants blaring out of the sound system. Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the ring.

Raper
vs
Turturro

193 cm
24
255 lbs
16 - 4 - 0

180 cm
25
249 lbs
12 - 4 - 0

Good wrestling
World class MT
Insanely flexible

Excellent grappler
Decent boxing
Granite chin

KOMBAT KLOTHING
Ma Balls Is Hot Clothing

UnderGround Supplements
Condemned

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 16 - 4 - 0, fighting out of London, Biff Raper!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 12 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Umberto Turturro!
The judges for this bout are , Jack Bonds and Timothy Bukovac.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Turturro blocks a head kick by Raper.

Turturro closes the distance and gets a double leg, slamming Raper to the mat! Raper manages to get full guard.

Turturro thinks about going for a leg but decides against it, in order to maintain the position.

Turturro drops back looking for a leg! Raper is in trouble here! The fighters roll with the hold and Raper manages to kick Turturro off! Turturro jumps back into Raper's guard.

Turturro drops back for a leg! It's a sloppy attempt though and Turturro jumps back into guard quickly, to retain the dominant position.
The fighters are trapped in the ropes so we're going to have a reposition here. The ref calls for a break and repositions the fighters in the center of the ring.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Turturro stopping the sweep attempt from Raper.
Turturro has been taking part in the yoga sessions down at The Philippines Finest. Presumably he's going to look for a slick submission... Or maybe he's looking to avoid one.

Turturro drops back, looking for a kneebar! Raper looks panicked! The fighters roll across the mat, one looking to finish, one looking to escape. Raper looks to have wriggled free... Yes, he's got his leg free and he's dived into side control! Good work there from Raper!

Turturro sneaks a leg under to get back to half guard.
Raper will need to keep those long limbs tucked in whilst he's on the ground, to prevent any submissions.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Raper wants to control but Turturro is keeping him busy.
Raper is figuring out what he wants to do next.

Turturro actively working from the bottom here.

Turturro actively working from the bottom here.
Raper with a momentary lay and pray from half guard.

Turturro actively working from the bottom here.
Raper prevents Turturro from improving his position.
The fighters are tangled up in the ropes here. We might need a restart if the fighters can't break free themselves.
Turturro works his way to full guard. Good work.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Neither fighter has done anything of merit for a good minute or two here and the crowd are not happy about it.

Raper is posturing up here but Turturro has hold of an arm and he's gone for an armbar! Raper tries to roll out but it's too tight and Raper has to tap! Slick submission there by Turturro!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:20 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (Armbar). Umberto Turturro!
After the fight, Umberto Turturro was humble in paying tribute to his opponent but made it clear he wants to go on to bigger and better things. It seemed to go down well with the crowd who cheered him loudly.