PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Dewey Nobrainer (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jet Jenson Jr (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Nobrainer comes to the cage accompanied by Pink Floyd- another brick in the wall. Jenson Jr has chosen MIA-Paper planes as his entrance music. Dewey Nobrainer has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

Nobrainer
vs
Jenson Jr

200 cm
26
255 lbs
7 - 2 - 0

187 cm
23
266 lbs
6 - 3 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Lethal high kicks
Big right hand

BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent MT
Knockout power

RAGS of a RONIN
Sully's Bar & Grill

Pit Bull Development
RAGS of a RONIN

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 7 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Dewey Nobrainer!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Jet Jenson Jr!
The judges for this bout are Frank Dennis, Cecil Peabody and Gwen Towbar.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Nobrainer misses with a shot to the body
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.
Jenson Jr explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work.
Jenson Jr throws a sloppy head kick and Nobrainer moves out of range easily.
It looked like Nobrainer was trying to counter with a body shot coming off that last attack from Jenson Jr.
Nobrainer dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Jenson Jr. That did some damage!
Thud! ouch! good body kick from Jenson Jr - that will leave a mark!
Jenson Jr should think about turning a few of those tyres round his middle into muscle if he wants people to take him seriously as an athlete.
Jenson Jr cracks the inside of Nobrainer's front leg.
We've been informed that Jenson Jr has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.
Jenson Jr lands with a thumping leg kick.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Jenson Jr misses with an attempted mid kick.
Nobrainer throws a feint and then finishes with a kick to the body.
Nobrainer thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Jenson Jr if he has to take too many more of those.
Jenson Jr looks winded!

That's one minute gone in the round.
Jenson Jr goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
It looked like Nobrainer wanted to counter with a hook but didn't fully commit.
Jenson Jr avoids the body shot from Nobrainer.
Nobrainer lands a nice shot that snaps Jenson Jr's head back.
Jenson Jr misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Jenson Jr gets off balance looking for a body kick
and Nobrainer counters with a leg kick.
Nobrainer lands a jab to the head.

It looks like Jet Jenson Jr has been cut.
Jenson Jr checks the leg kick nicely there.
Jenson Jr chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Nobrainer can pounce on him.
Nobrainer misses with a kick to the body.
A little jabbing left from Jenson Jr on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Nobrainer swings and misses with a hook to the body.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Nobrainer ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Jenson Jr lands with a right hand.
Jenson Jr misses with a body kick.
Nobrainer half committed to a counter leg kick.
A punch lands to the side of Nobrainer 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Jenson Jr throws an overhand right that lands on Nobrainer's shoulder, as Nobrainer tries to avoid the shot.
Good standup being displayed there by Nobrainer as he connects with a hook.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Jenson Jr misses with a looping left.
Nobrainer avoids a kick to the body.
Jenson Jr feints and then cracks Nobrainer's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Nobrainer down.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Nobrainer throws a series of punches but Jenson Jr moves out of range.
Nobrainer moves into range and connects with a jab.
Nice straight punches there by Nobrainer. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Nobrainer.
Nobrainer's jab looks to have found its range, popping Jenson Jr under the eye.
Jenson Jr swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Nobrainer moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.
Jenson Jr misses with a head kick.
And Nobrainer counters with a quick kick to the body but Jenson Jr blocks it.
Jenson Jr moves out of range of the body kick.
Jenson Jr shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Jenson Jr slips a straight right by Nobrainer.
Nobrainer lands a nice looking body shot.
Jenson Jr throws a leg kick but Nobrainer moved away.
And Nobrainer counters with a quick kick to the body but Jenson Jr blocks it.
Nobrainer lands a slapping body shot.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Jenson Jr swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Nobrainer is really peppering his opponent's head with punches.
Nobrainer throws a leg kick
and Jenson Jr connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Jenson Jr misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Nobrainer connects with the punch.
Jenson Jr delivers a nice body kick.
Jenson Jr tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Dewey Nobrainer dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Jet Jenson Jr's cut.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

Nobrainer throws a leg kick
and Jenson Jr counters with a body kick that brings a smile to the face of both fighters.
Nobrainer steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Jenson Jr.
Nobrainer is looking to counter with a body kick.
We're hearing some news coming in from back stage. It's official - Jenson Jr has eaten all the pies!
Nobrainer defending well as Jenson Jr loads up on a big left hand.
A little feinted left hand from Nobrainer on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Jenson Jr pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Nobrainer is looking to counter with a shot to the body.
Jenson Jr checks a leg kick nicely.
Jenson Jr raises up his leg as if looking to counter with a high kick.
Nobrainer is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Nobrainer pivots as if he's going to throw a leg kick but stops half way.
Nobrainer moves out of range as Jenson Jr throws a body kick.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Nobrainer scores with a push kick.
Jenson Jr throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
Nobrainer misses with a hook
enabling Jenson Jr to counter with a crisp jab.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Nice cross by Nobrainer.
Jenson Jr throws a push kick but Nobrainer slaps the foot to one side.
Nobrainer appeared to be looking to counter that last move with a leg kick.
Jenson Jr takes one on the button.
Jenson Jr throws a body kick that misses.
Nobrainer seem to be loading up, looking for a big counter.
Nobrainer throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
Nobrainer pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Jenson Jr throws a head kick but Nobrainer moves out of range.
Nobrainer fakes a jab and scores with a low kick.
Nobrainer lands a leg kick that knocks Jenson Jr off balance momentarily.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Jenson Jr tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Nobrainer blocks a head kick by Jenson Jr.
Jenson Jr misses with a body kick.
Nobrainer bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Jenson Jr avoids a kick to the body.
Jenson Jr chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Nobrainer can pounce on him.
Nobrainer looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Nobrainer jabs Jenson Jr right on the nose. Jenson Jr blinks but takes it well.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Jenson Jr attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Nobrainer throws a leg kick that misses.
Nobrainer misses with an uppercut. Jenson Jr saw that one coming.
Jenson Jr connects with a body shot that sends Nobrainer's belly button to the back.
Jenson Jr scores with a jab.
Nobrainer swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Jenson Jr moves out of range of the body kick from Nobrainer.
Jenson Jr throws a sloppy head kick and Nobrainer moves out of range easily.
Nobrainer jinks towards his opponent looking like he wants to counter with a mid kick but doesn't commit.
Nobrainer checks the leg kick.
Jenson Jr goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Jenson Jr misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Jenson Jr needs to keep his hands up - Nobrainer had a free shot at his head there.
Dewey Nobrainer is winning the standup battle so far.
Jenson Jr throws out a loose jab but Nobrainer uses good head movement to avoid it.
Nobrainer blocks a head kick by Jenson Jr.
Nobrainer does a little shimmy and throws a leg kick. The leg kick missed by a considerable margin though, making him look a little bit silly for doing the shimmy.
Jenson Jr misses with an attempted mid kick.
Jenson Jr just misses with a punch to the body.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Jenson Jr moves into range and connects with a jab.
An inside leg kick lands from Nobrainer.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Dewey Nobrainer will probably get the nod.
The cut man is working on Jet Jenson Jr's cut.
That's time! Nobrainer's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. This is the final round!

A slapping body kick lands there for Nobrainer.
Nobrainer lands a nice looking kick to the body. Jenson Jr takes a step back to recover.
The sound of bone on bone echoes around the arena as Jenson Jr checks a leg kick.
Nobrainer connects with a nice looking jab.
Nobrainer lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Jenson Jr's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
Jenson Jr misses with a wild body shot.
As Jenson Jr backs away, Nobrainer returns fire with a leg kick that just misses.
Jenson Jr takes one to the side of the head.

That has opened up Jet Jenson Jr's cut even more.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Nobrainer tries to score with a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Jenson Jr looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Ooooh, nice body kick lands from Nobrainer. Jenson Jr shrugs it off though.
Nobrainer takes a swing at Jenson Jr's ribcage but misses.
Jenson Jr throws out a counter right but Nobrainer avoids it with no problem.
Jenson Jr takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Nobrainer thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Jenson Jr if he has to take too many more of those.
An inside leg kick lands from Nobrainer.
Jenson Jr misses with a series of wild punches.
Nobrainer scores with a nice body kick.
Crunch! Nobrainer slams his shin into Jenson Jr's torso.
Jenson Jr takes a shot to the nose. Hopefully that hasn't broken it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A good leg kick by Nobrainer.
Nobrainer uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Jenson Jr has time to react.
Jenson Jr tries to land a body kick
and Nobrainer makes the exchange count by landing a cracking kick to the body. Jenson Jr really felt that one!
Nobrainer scores with a kick to the body.
Nobrainer fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Jenson Jr manages to avoid it.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Jenson Jr misses with a looping right.
It really doesn't seem like the step up in weight is hurting Nobrainer here at all. He's more than holding his own against the bigger man.
Jenson Jr throws a sloppy head kick and Nobrainer moves out of range easily.

Nobrainer feints and then winds up with a huge right hand that connects perfectly and sends Jenson Jr sprawling to the canvas! Jenson Jr rolls over backwards and springs off the cage and manages to regain his footing - how acrobatic! Oh, he's still wobbly - can Nobrainer finish him?!

Jenson Jr is rocked!
Jenson Jr drops his hands momentarily. Nobrainer doesn't need a second invitation, landing a shot to the temple. Jenson Jr staggers and falls to the mat and the ref dives in to save him from any more punishment. Jenson Jr doesn't seem happy with the stoppage but he was done.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:59 of round 3, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Dewey Nobrainer!
After the fight, Dewey Nobrainer was humble in paying tribute to his opponent but made it clear he wants to go on to bigger and better things. It seemed to go down well with the crowd who cheered him loudly.
Jet Jenson Jr was interviewed post fight and said 'Mayday mayday!! were going down...I repeat... mayday mayday!! were going down!!'.