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The Island Season 5, 265 lbs, Round 3 PBP Commentary |
Undercard bout
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Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Mark Wahlberg (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Keola Fatu (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). These two fighters really are very evenly matched on the feet - it will be fascinating to see who can assert themselves in that aspect of the fight.
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| 200 cm
27
242 lbs
8 - 4 - 0 |
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183 cm
20
280 lbs
11 - 2 - 0 |
BJJ Blue Belt
Great low kicks
Very strong |
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Good wrestler
Decent boxing
Powerful |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Mark Wahlberg!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
11 - 2 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Keola Fatu!
The judges for this bout are David Hoff, Winston Alpacca and Dirk Anderson.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Wahlberg misses with a head kick.
Wahlberg pushes Fatu away with a front kick.
Fatu closes the distance and pushes Wahlberg back into the cage.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Fatu.
Fatu lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Wahlberg backwards.
Fatu lands a nice uppercut.
Fatu is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Wahlberg is defending well for now.
Fatu misses with a body punch.
Fatu doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Wahlberg tries to stall but Fatu uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Fatu is clearly stalling here... Pick up the pace son.
A short right from Fatu.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Wahlberg blocks a body shot from Fatu.
Wahlberg wants to get back to striking at distance but Fatu won't allow it.
Fatu content to slow the pace in the clinch.
A left hand lands to the body for Fatu.
Wahlberg blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Fatu misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Fatu tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Wahlberg's elbow.
Fatu throws a punch but it's blocked by Wahlberg.
Wahlberg is trying to stall.
Wahlberg is trying to maintain a safe position but Fatu gets an underhook and turns Wahlberg into the cage.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Well. There's a bit of a lull in the action here and the crowd are starting to get restless.
Fatu misses with a hook to the ribs.
A short right from Fatu on the inside.
Wahlberg is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Fatu is keeping busy.
Wahlberg takes a shot to the head.
I was talking to Wahlberg's coach per-fight and he was telling me that they'd been working on the clinch in the runup to this fight.
Fatu lands a hook that snaps the head of Wahlberg backwards.
Fatu lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Wahlberg or not.
Wahlberg manages to get underhooks and slows down the pace for a moment.
Wahlberg blocks the elbow strike.
Wahlberg is trying to stall.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Fatu throws a punch but it's blocked by Wahlberg.
Fatu prevents Wahlberg from breaking the clinch.
Fatu misses with a body punch.
Wahlberg stalling here - the referee won't stand for too much of that.
Wahlberg is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the cage.
Fatu has been looking to improve his clinch game in recent weeks. Wahlberg seems to have the measure of him in the clinch so far, so let's see if Fatu can turn it around.
Fatu tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Wahlberg avoids it.
Fatu misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Wahlberg.
Fatu tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Wahlberg avoiding damage as Fatu throws knees to the body.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Wahlberg is trying to break free.
Wahlberg stalling in the clinch but Fatu improves position.
Fatu cracks Wahlberg with a nice body shot.
Fatu stalling the fight.
Stalling in the clinch from Fatu.
Fatu effectively controlling the action here.
Fatu misses with a hook to the ribs.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Fatu lands with a right to the head.
Fatu will no doubt start fighting again in a minute but for now he's just having a little rest, leaning Wahlberg up against the cage.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Keola Fatu dominated that round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!
Wahlberg thows a leg kick but Fatu checks it
and Fatu counters with a shoot takedown. Wahlberg fights it but they end up in guard.
Fatu loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
Wahlberg trying to control the position.
Wahlberg looking for a sweep. Not yet Wahlberg, not yet.
Wahlberg is trying to keep Fatu in close.
Fatu stays in close to Wahlberg's body and controls the position.
Wahlberg working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Fatu.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Wahlberg trying to control the position.
Fatu cracks Wahlberg with a solid left hand.
Wahlberg trying to keep a closed guard but Fatu is proving a slippery customer.
Fatu has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Wahlberg is going to have to think about doing something other than just controlling because Fatu is managing to avoid having the position dictated to him.
Fatu throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as Wahlberg works some decent striking defense from the bottom.
Wahlberg not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
The referee has stepped in and called for a break in the action. We'll restart on the feet.
Wahlberg takes one to the side of the head.
Wahlberg gets tackled into the cage by Fatu. Fatu maintains the clinch.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by Fatu as Wahlberg tries to tie him up.
Fatu lands with a right to the head.
Wahlberg wants to break free. God knows he wants to breaaaak freeee.
Fatu tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Fatu misses with a punch to the body.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Fatu misses with a short punch on the inside.
Fatu doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Fatu gets through Wahlberg's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Wahlberg wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Fatu has him pressed against the cage.
A real battle for position is taking place between these two warriors.
Fatu swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Wahlberg tries to stall but Fatu uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Stalling in the clinch from Fatu.
Fatu throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Wahlbergs head.
Fatu misses with a body punch.
Fatu makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Wahlberg has Fatu pressed against the cage.
Keola Fatu seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far.
Fatu tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Wahlberg's elbow.
Fatu misses with a body punch.
Fatu tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Wahlberg is trying to push Fatu away but Fatu has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Fatu lands a body punch.
Knees in the clinch landing for Fatu.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
A shot in the inside from Fatu.
Fatu lands a shoulder strike.
Fatu lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Wahlberg or not.
Fatu throws an elbow that misses.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Fatu scores with a shot to the side of Wahlberg's head.
A hook to the body from Fatu.
Fatu lands a body punch in the clinch.
Nice body punch from Fatu.
Fatu throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
Fatu misses with a hook to the ribs.
Fatu is clearly stalling here... Pick up the pace son.
Fatu lands a hook that snaps the head of Wahlberg backwards.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Fatu trying to land knees to the body.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Keola Fatu showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final round!
Wahlberg tries to land a front kick but Fatu steps back. That was a bit too telegraphed.
Wahlberg throws a chopping leg kick but Fatu manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
A leg kick checked by Fatu.
Wahlberg uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Fatu.
As Fatu looks to move away, Wahlberg throws a big counter combo but Fatu just gets out of the way.
Mark Wahlberg seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Fatu throws a shot from downtown. Wahlberg moves away and avoids it.
Fatu misses with a hook. Wahlberg ducked under it nicely.
Wahlberg cracks the inside of Fatu's front leg.
Fatu has been the more effective fighter overall so far.
A really sloppy takedown attempt there from Fatu.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Nice uppercut there from Wahlberg.
Fatu tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Good standup being displayed there by Wahlberg as he connects with a hook.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Wahlberg lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
A good leg kick by Wahlberg.
Fatu misses with a wild body shot.
Fatu finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
Wahlberg scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Fatu misses with a hook. Wahlberg ducked under it nicely.
Fatu throws a leg kick but Wahlberg checks it.
An inside leg kick lands from Wahlberg.
Wahlberg thuds his right hand into Fatu's forehead from close range. That could be painful for both fighters.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from Wahlberg.
A decent looking body kick lands there for Wahlberg.
Wahlberg fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Fatu.
Fatu takes a kick to the side of the head.
Mark Wahlberg has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
That's two minutes gone in the round.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Fatu throws a head kick that misses.
Fatu throws a front kick aimed at Wahlberg's knee but Wahlberg avoids it well.
Wahlberg lands a jab.
Fatu has his front leg slapped to the side - a nice low kick landing there from Wahlberg.
A bone on bone clash there as Fatu blocks the leg kick.
Fatu tries a counter takedown but it's more of a dummy move, and he uses it to push himself away.
Fatu misses with a hook. Wahlberg ducked under it nicely.
Fatu checks the leg kick.
Whack! Wahlberg lands a heavy head kick that drops Fatu. The ref tackles Wahlberg to stop the fight - a great save by the referee because Fatu was done.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:50 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Head Kick). Mark Wahlberg!
An out of breath Mark Wahlberg thanked his loyal fans in his post fight interview, giving them credit for his success over the course of his career.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
46% |
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Undercard bout
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Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Papa Shango (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Voljin Ulfzaar (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Shango comes to the cage accompanied by Shango Tango. Papa Shango is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.
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| 189 cm
27
280 lbs
11 - 2 - 0 |
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193 cm
27
270 lbs
17 - 3 - 0 |
BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Cardio machine |
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BJJ White Belt
Excellent MT
Heavy handed |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
11 - 2 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Papa Shango!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
17 - 3 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Voljin Ulfzaar!
The judges for this bout are David Hoff, Bart Greer and Winston Alpacca.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Shango missing with a left hand there. Ulfzaar was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Shango looks to land a right hand but Ulfzaar moved out of range.
A telegraphed right hand from Shango misses the target.
Shango definitely looks more muscular than last time we saw him fight.
Ulfzaar throws a lazy body kick
and Ulfzaar takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Ulfzaar uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Shango.
Ulfzaar wants to counter with a clinch but Shango pushes him away.
A swing and a miss from Shango.
Ulfzaar steps in looking to counter with the mid kick but it doesn't connect.
A slow jab from Shango misses its intended target.
Shango defending well as Ulfzaar loads up on a big left hand.
Ulfzaar lands a leg kick that knocks Shango off balance momentarily.
Shango misses with a wild body shot.
Shango lands with a right hand.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Shango throws a poor cross that misses
and Ulfzaar counters with a two punch combo.
Shango digs a good hook to Ulfzaar's body.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Shango connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.
Shango sees a low kick coming and goes to check it, but it's actually a body kick and it thuds into his unprotected ribs.
Nice shot by Shango.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Ulfzaar gets a clinch.
Shango blocking some punches.
Nice body punch from Shango.
Ulfzaar tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
A short body shot lands from Shango as the two fighters clinch.
Shango breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
A slow jab from Ulfzaar misses its intended target.
Shango misses with a hook.
Ulfzaar has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Shango finds it's way round the side to connect with Ulfzaar's head.
Ulfzaar misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Shango.
Shango connects with a right hand. Ulfzaar shakes it off.
Shango takes a kick to the body and keeps moving.
Shango throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Ulfzaar sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Shango misses with a body shot.
A telegraphed right hand from Shango misses the target.
Ulfzaar ducks under a wild hook from Shango.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Shango takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Shango misses with an uppercut. Ulfzaar saw that one coming.
Shango swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Ulfzaar delivers a nice body kick.
A good leg kick by Ulfzaar.
Shango misses with an uppercut.
Shango throws a shot to the body.
Ulfzaar jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Ulfzaar shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
A big left from Shango misses.
Shango jabbing away but nothing is landing.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Ulfzaar! But no joy.
Ulfzaar slips a jab and a cross from Shango.
Shango misses with a left hand
and Ulfzaar counters with a straight right hand.
It looks like Papa Shango has been cut.
Shango looks to land a left hand but Ulfzaar moved out of range nicely.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ulfzaar displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Shango throws out the jab.
Ulfzaar uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Shango.
Shango ducks under a wild hook from Ulfzaar.
Shango keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Ulfzaar.
Shango wants to take advantage of his opponent's missed offense by moving into the clinch.
Ulfzaar scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Ulfzaar throws a body punch but Shango moves out of range.
Shango misses with an uppercut
and Ulfzaar counters with a three punch combo that has Shango backing up. Shango nods at Ulfzaar to acknowledge the strikes.
Ulfzaar lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
A slapping body kick lands there for Ulfzaar.
Shango is breathing heavily.
Ulfzaar scores with a nice body kick.
Ulfzaar misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Shango.
Ulfzaar fakes a head shot and lands one to the body.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Ulfzaar ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Shango moves away.
Shango misses with a lunging right hand
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Ulfzaar gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.
Shango digs a right hand underneath Ulfzaar's ribcage. Ulfzaar let out a lung full of air as it connected.
Ulfzaar lands a shoulder strike.
Shango tries to break free but Ulfzaar pushes him back against the cage.
Ulfzaar tries to throw a body punch but Shango avoids it by throwing Ulfzaar back against the cage.
Ulfzaar pushes Shango back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
Ulfzaar lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Shango backwards.
Ulfzaar swings wildly with an uppercut but Shango uses good head movement to avoid it.
Ulfzaar working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Shango is trying to work out of this bad position, with his back against the cage.
Ulfzaar doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Ulfzaar blocks an uppercut.
Ulfzaar lands a hook that snaps the head of Shango backwards.
A short uppercut from Shango.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Ulfzaar pushes Shango back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
A short left from Ulfzaar.
Ulfzaar lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Ulfzaar doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Shango misses with some punches.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Voljin Ulfzaar dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Papa Shango's cut.
Well, the break between rounds is over. Let's get back to the scrappin!
Ulfzaar feints and then cracks Shango's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Shango down.
Ulfzaar takes a swing at Shango's ribcage but misses.
Shango throws a hook but Ulfzaar blocks it.
Shango throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Ulfzaar keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Ulfzaar sends Shango crashing to the mat with a devastating uppercut! Ulfzaar is motioning to the referee to let Shango up. He wants to try and finish this one on the feet!
Ulfzaar has been the more effective fighter overall so far.
Good standup being displayed there by Shango as he connects with a hook.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Shango throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
A slapping leg kick lands for Ulfzaar.
Ulfzaar misses with a kick to the body.
Papa Shango seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Ulfzaar throws a lazy right hand but Shango sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Shango misses with a body shot.
Shango throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Shango just misses with a punch to the body.
Shango looks to land a left hand but Ulfzaar moved out of range nicely.
Ulfzaar appears to be waiting to throw a counter punch to the body.
That's one minute gone in the round.
A telegraphed right hand from Shango misses the target.
Ulfzaar throws a body shot but no joy.
Ulfzaar throws the kick towards the body but Shango avoids it.
Shango tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Ulfzaar tries to clinch but Shango is having none of it.
Shango throws a hook but Ulfzaar blocks it.
Shango throws out a loose jab but Ulfzaar uses good head movement to avoid it.
A jab from Shango misses.
Ulfzaar appeared to try and counter that last move with a leg kick.
Shango digs a good hook to Ulfzaar's body.
Shango throws a sloppy body shot
and Ulfzaar counters with a straight right hand.
Papa Shango's cut is getting worse.
Ulfzaar clinches with his opponent.
Ulfzaar blocks an uppercut.
Shango is trying to break the clinch but Ulfzaar has him pressed against the cage.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Ulfzaar.
Ulfzaar fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ulfzaar stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body.
A head punch on the inside from Shango fails to land.
Shango struggles to land a body shot inside as Ulfzaar controls his hands.
Ulfzaar blocks an uppercut.
Ulfzaar tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Shango's elbow.
A shot in the inside from Ulfzaar.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Shango swings wildly with an uppercut but Ulfzaar uses good head movement to avoid it.
Ulfzaar can't find room to land a body shot as Shango controls the action.
Ulfzaar scores with a hook to the body.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Shango fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Ulfzaar stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body.
Ulfzaar pushes Shango back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
A right hand to the body from Ulfzaar.
A nice right hand lands inside from Ulfzaar.
Ulfzaar lands a right hand that snaps the head of Shango backwards.
Papa Shango's cut is bleeding quite badly. He's got to try and protect it.
Ulfzaar throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Shangos head.
Ulfzaar doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Ulfzaar pushes Shango back against the cage and unloads with a body punch.
Ulfzaar lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Shango's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
That's three minutes gone in the round.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Shango.
A short body shot lands from Ulfzaar as the two fighters clinch.
Ulfzaar is looking to control Shango's arms but Shango gets an underhook and turns him. Now Ulfzaar has his back to the cage.
Shango blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Ulfzaar works on Shango's body with a couple of short punches.
Ulfzaar misses with the head strike.
Voljin Ulfzaar seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far.
Ulfzaar lands with a light punch inside.
Jeez, Papa Shango's cut is really nasty now. The referee must be thinking about getting that checked.
Ulfzaar misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Ulfzaar scores with a shoulder strike.
Ulfzaar lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Shango backwards.
The referee calls the doctor in to look at Papa Shango's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:38 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Voljin Ulfzaar!
A relieved looking Voljin Ulfzaar thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
58% |
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Co-main event
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Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Zee Snore (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Theodore Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Both fighters will be looking to make this an exciting fight for the fans, I'm sure!
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| 192 cm
20
255 lbs
11 - 2 - 0 |
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194 cm
27
245 lbs
14 - 3 - 0 |
BJJ White Belt
Excellent MT
Cardio machine |
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Decent wrestler
Decent boxing
Good gas tank |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
11 - 2 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Zee Snore!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
14 - 3 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Theodore Thundercunt!
The judges for this bout are Winston Alpacca, Santiago Holmes and Bart Greer.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Thundercunt misses with a body punch
and Snore connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
A jab from Snore misses.
Thundercunt takes a swing at Snore's ribcage but misses.
Snore uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Thundercunt.
A decent looking cross lands there for Snore.
Nice defenses there by Thundercunt.
Thundercunt throws a counter combo.
Snore throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Snore throws a hook but Thundercunt blocks it.
Thundercunt uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Snore.
Snore throws a poor cross that misses
and Thundercunt cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
A jab from Thundercunt finds it's way through Snore's defenses.
Snore throws a series of punches but Thundercunt avoids them all with ease.
Thundercunt bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Snore seems to be moving with more speed, compared to his last bout. He must have been working on that in the gym.
Snore lands a nice hook to Thundercunt's body. Thundercunt takes it in his stride and looks to land his own strikes.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Thundercunt misses with a left hand
and Snore counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Thundercunt ducks under a wild hook from Snore.
That's one minute gone in the round.
A big right from Snore misses.
Thundercunt scores with a jab to the jaw of his opponent.
A looping hook to the body misses from Thundercunt. Snore does a little dance to reset his feet.
Snore swung with a counter right hand that didn't connect.
Snore throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Thundercunt displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Snore throws out the jab.
It seemed like Thundercunt was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Thundercunt clobbers Snore with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Snore avoids the body shot from Thundercunt.
Snore scores with a one two! Thundercunt had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.
Snore slips a jab from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt scores with a punch to the head.
Snore is rocked!
Snore misses with a looping right.
Snore cracks Thundercunt with an open hand slap.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
A looping hook to the body misses from Thundercunt. Snore does a little dance to reset his feet.
Thundercunt takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
Thundercunt fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Snore manages to avoid it.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt lands with a good body shot.
Thundercunt misses the jab.
Snore rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Thundercunt counters with a left to the body.
Thundercunt looks more muscular than last time we saw him. He must have been on the weights.
Snore ducks right into an uppercut from Thundercunt.
Snore moves out of range of the strikes.
Thundercunt throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Snore uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt digs a good body shot into Snore's ribs.
Snore moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.
Thundercunt swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Nice uppercut lands for Thundercunt. That snapped Snore's head back.
Thundercunt throws an overhand right that lands on Snore's shoulder, as Snore tries to avoid the shot.
Snore throws a right hand that misses
and Thundercunt counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Thundercunt is landing a lot of head punches in this opening round! Snore had better start moving his head a bit unless he wants his face to turn into pâté.
Snore throws a jab when Thundercunt was well out of range.
Thundercunt swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Snore slips a jab from Thundercunt.
Snore throws a hook but Thundercunt avoids it easily.
Thundercunt cracks Snore with a good jab.
Oh Snore is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!!
Snore fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Snore seems to have got his legs back now.
Snore misses with a hook
and Thundercunt connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Thundercunt takes one on the button.
Snore is really head hunting here, hardly looking to strike to the body at all.
A swing and a miss from Thundercunt.
Snore wants to take advantage of his opponent's missed offense by moving into the clinch.
A slow jab from Thundercunt misses its intended target.
A jab from Snore does it's job there.
Thundercunt throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Snore loads up on a big right hand but Thundercunt slips the punch.
A telegraphed right hand from Snore misses the target.
Snore misses with an uppercut. Thundercunt saw that one coming.
Thundercunt throws a nice looking combination but Snore bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
An attempted straight right counter from Snore misses the target.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Snore listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thundercunt uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Snore.
A big left from Thundercunt misses.
A slow jab from Thundercunt misses its intended target.
Thundercunt scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Thundercunt pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Snore connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.
Snore uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Thundercunt.
Snore throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Snore swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Snore takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
A punch lands to the side of Thundercunt 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Thundercunt works the jab nicely.
A nice combination there by Snore.
Thundercunt is rocked!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
That was a close round but I would say that Zee Snore will probably get the nod.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!
Thundercunt staying out of range there.
Thundercunt is still on wobbly legs! Can Snore finish him?
Thundercunt gets caught by a big overhand right and goes down! Snore gets on top of him and starts throwing some serious punches until the ref intervenes and stops the fight!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:07 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Zee Snore!
After winning the bout, Zee Snore thanked all his fans and promised he'd do even better in his next fight. The crowd seemed to love his humility.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
64% |
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Main event
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Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Tommy Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Paddy Walker (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Thundercunt comes to the cage accompanied by You are a Cunt. I don't know about you partner, but I'm pumped for this one!
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| 197 cm
26
260 lbs
13 - 0 - 0 |
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190 cm
26
269 lbs
8 - 4 - 0 |
Decent wrestler
Great elbows
Cardio machine |
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BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
13 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Tommy Thundercunt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Paddy Walker!
The judges for this bout are Santiago Holmes, Bart Greer and Sandra Marshall.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Walker jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Walker avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
A jab from Walker does it's job there.
It looks like Tommy Thundercunt has been cut.
Thundercunt uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Walker.
Thundercunt was looking to counter that last move with a shot to the body but he didn't commit.
Walker lands with a nice body punch.
Thundercunt looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Thundercunt moves into range and connects with a jab.
Walker ducks under a wild hook from Thundercunt.
Walker scores with a three punch combo!
Thundercunt with a nice cross.
Thundercunt avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Walker rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
letting Thundercunt counter with a right hand.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Walker swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
As Walker tries to get set, Thundercunt tries to push him back and clinch up but Walker manages to avoid the attempt.
Walker throws a lazy right hand but Thundercunt sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Thundercunt appeared to be looking to counter that last move with a leg kick.
Thundercunt misses with a body shot.
Walker swings widly with a right hand
and Thundercunt counters by moving into the clinch.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Walker can't find room to land a body shot as Thundercunt controls the action.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Thundercunt.
Walker goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Walker swings wildly with an uppercut but Thundercunt uses good head movement to avoid it.
A body shot lands from Walker.
Thundercunt throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
A hook to the body from Thundercunt.
Walker looks winded!
Thundercunt breaks from the clinch.
Thundercunt pounces like a tiger and cracks Walker with a vicious hook! Walker is down but not out! Thundercunt follows up with more strikes forcing the ref to jump in and stop it!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:34 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Punches). Tommy Thundercunt!
During a confident post fight interview, Tommy Thundercunt thanked all his fans. He seemed very genuine when describing how motivated his fans keep him.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
64% |
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