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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Ilmari Kuusi (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Theodore Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!
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189 cm
26
255 lbs
8 - 4 - 0 |
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194 cm
27
245 lbs
10 - 3 - 0 |
Good wrestling
Basic striking
Very strong |
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Decent wrestler
Decent boxing
Good gas tank |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world! Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner. With a record of
8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Ilmari Kuusi! And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner. With a record of
10 - 3 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Theodore Thundercunt! The judges for this bout are Bart Greer, Michael Johnstone and Peter Branson.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway! Nice body punch from Thundercunt. Kuusi shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Thundercunt pinned against the cage. Thundercunt gets the underhooks and manages to circle away. Thundercunt connects with a looping right hand.
Kuusi has been working on his balance at Cozad The Island, so perhaps that has help him stuff some of the takedown attempts by Thundercunt. Kuusi shoots in but doesn't get the takedown and Thundercunt connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle. Kuusi fails with a takedown attempt. That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Ilmari Kuusi. That's going to take a lot out of him. Thundercunt connects with a lovely right hand, straight down the pipe. We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up. Kuusi takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch. Thundercunt with a nice cross. Thundercunt digs a good body shot into Kuusi's ribs. Kuusi misses with a takedown attempt and Thundercunt counters with a nice right hand that sends Kuusi toppling to the canvas! Kuusi scrambles and gets back to his feet - can Thundercunt finish him?!
Kuusi is rocked!
It looks like Ilmari Kuusi has been cut.
That's one minute gone in the round. Kuusi circles to his right, straight into a beautiful hook by Thundercunt. Kuusi falls face first into the canvas - great knockout victory for Thundercunt!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:06 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Theodore Thundercunt! Theodore Thundercunt is the new heavyweight champion!
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S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
82% |
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