PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Scott Minerva (ranked 710 p4p, 35 weight class) and Ubungu Bamboo Face (ranked 988 p4p, 49 weight class). Minerva comes to the cage accompanied by My Pal. Scott Minerva is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

Minerva
vs
Bamboo Face

183 cm
32
280 lbs
13 - 5 - 0

205 cm
23
285 lbs
11 - 5 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

Conviction
Ma Balls Is Hot Clothing

Ma Balls Is Hot Clothing

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 13 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Scott Minerva!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 11 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Ubungu Bamboo Face!
The judges for this bout are Gwen Towbar, Tiny Johnson and Stewart Dunkirk.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Minerva tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Bamboo Face manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Minerva fakes a jab and scores with a low kick.

Bamboo Face has closed the distance and engaged Minerva in a clinch.
Bamboo Face tries to work over Minerva's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Minerva jumps guard but Bamboo Face turns him against the cage and keeps the fight standing.
Bamboo Face misses with the head strike.
Bamboo Face misses with a punch to the body.
Minerva is trying to break free.
Minerva has a couple of punches blocked by Bamboo Face.
Minerva fails to land with a short punch on the inside.

Minerva breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Scott Minerva seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Bamboo Face uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Minerva.
Minerva misses with a hook
letting Bamboo Face counter with a right hand.
Minerva throws an overhand right that lands on Bamboo Face's shoulder, as Bamboo Face tries to avoid the shot.
Minerva jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Minerva lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Minerva throws a poor cross that misses
and Bamboo Face counters with a straight right hand.
Bamboo Face tries to clinch there but Minerva circles away.
Minerva wants to clinch
and Bamboo Face counters with a stiff right hand.
Minerva ducks down and throws a hook to the body.
Minerva takes a swing at Bamboo Face's ribcage but misses.
Minerva throws an overhand right that lands on Bamboo Face's shoulder, as Bamboo Face tries to avoid the shot.
Minerva tries to clinch up
and Bamboo Face counters with a nice uppercut.
Ubungu Bamboo Face is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Nice uppercut there from Minerva.
Bamboo Face displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Minerva throws out the jab.
Minerva throws a big shot that misses.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Bamboo Face! But no joy.
Minerva misses with a takedown attempt
and Bamboo Face counters with a lovely straight right hand!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Minerva defending well as Bamboo Face loads up on a big left hand.
Minerva lands with an uppercut that bounces Bamboo Face off the cage and back into range.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Good exchange - Minerva coming out on top.
A swing and a miss from Bamboo Face.
Minerva throws a solid leg kick but Bamboo Face takes the impact on his shin and smiles at Minerva.
A leg kick checked by Bamboo Face.
Minerva throws a series of punches but Bamboo Face moves out of range.
Minerva digs a good hook to Bamboo Face's body.

Minerva looking for a takedown here - he's got it.
Minerva is stalling in the full guard.
Minerva wants to pass the guard but Bamboo Face is keeping the position.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bamboo Face seems keen to control rather than go for a submission, at least for now.
Minerva tries to free his leg and advance position but Bamboo Face is retaining full guard.
Minerva controls from within his opponent's guard.
We must be close to a standup if these guys don't pick up the pace.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A lull in the action here being met with boos from the crowd.
Minerva wants to pass the guard but Bamboo Face is keeping the position.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Bamboo Face tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Minerva manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Bamboo Face keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Minerva.
Minerva throws a lazy uppercut
letting Bamboo Face counter with a right hand.
Bamboo Face scores with a big left there. The judges will like that one.
Minerva displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Bamboo Face throws out the jab.
A looping hook to the body misses from Minerva. Bamboo Face does a little dance to reset his feet.
Bamboo Face uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Minerva.
Bamboo Face wants to counter with a clinch but Minerva pushes him away.
Minerva lands with a good body shot.
Bamboo Face throws a body punch but Minerva moves out of range.
Bamboo Face is using his reach advantage to land shots from outside his opponent's range.
Minerva tries to grapple but his opponent circles
and Bamboo Face counters with a nice body shot.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Scott Minerva dominated that round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action.

Bamboo Face cracks a nice hook into Minerva's ribs.
Minerva scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Minerva slips under a jab.
A decent looking cross lands there for Minerva.
Bamboo Face displays good takedown defense there as he swats away a double leg from Minerva.
Minerva lands with a nice body kick.
Bamboo Face scores with a nice strike.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Minerva cracks the inside of Bamboo Face's front leg.
Bamboo Face moves his head to the side to avoid a jab but walks straight into a cross.
Minerva throws an off balance right hand
and Bamboo Face counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Decent striking displayed by Bamboo Face there.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
A combination from Minerva does no damage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bamboo Face steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Minerva.
Bamboo Face wants to counter the offense by Minerva and move into the clinch position.
The fight stays on the outside here - Minerva looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Minerva lands with a hook. Bamboo Face tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.
Bamboo Face walks into a stiff left hand from Minerva.
Bamboo Face moves out of range as Minerva strikes.
Bamboo Face circles away from the clinch attempt.
Bamboo Face lands with an overhand left.
Minerva throws a series of punches but Bamboo Face moves out of range.
Minerva misses with a straight left.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Bamboo Face! But no joy.
Bamboo Face blocks a jab.
Bamboo Face might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Minerva scores with a three punch combo!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Bamboo Face dodges the punch combination from Minerva.
Bamboo Face tries to counter with a clinch but Minerva shakes him off and moves away.
Bamboo Face takes a swing at Minerva's ribcage but misses.
An attempted straight right counter from Minerva misses the target.
Bamboo Face works Minerva's body with a nice hook.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Minerva takes a shot to the body in his stride.
A big right from Minerva misses.
Bamboo Face slips a jab from Minerva.
Bamboo Face throws out a counter right but Minerva avoids it with no problem.
Minerva misses with an uppercut
enabling Bamboo Face to counter with a crisp jab.
Good exchange - Bamboo Face coming out on top.
Minerva throws a hook but Bamboo Face avoids it easily.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Bamboo Face! But no joy.
Minerva keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Bamboo Face.
Nice cross by Bamboo Face.
A clash of legs there as Bamboo Face blocks the low kick.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Minerva scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Nice cross by Minerva.
Minerva throws the left hand but Bamboo Face avoids the punch easily.
Minerva tries to clinch there but Bamboo Face circles away.
Minerva misses with a lunging right hand
and Bamboo Face counters with a shot to the ribs. That looked like it hurt.
Minerva just misses with a punch to the body.
Minerva scores with the left hand. Bamboo Face knows he should have avoided that one.
Minerva throws a good cross that connects.
Minerva takes a hook to the side of the head. I wonder if that's got his ears ringing.
Minerva looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Bamboo Face moves out of range of the strikes.
Bamboo Face has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Minerva finds it's way round the side to connect with Bamboo Face's head.
Scott Minerva is winning the standup battle so far.
Minerva misses with a looping right.
Bamboo Face tries to counter by closing the distance.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Minerva throws a looping overhand right but Bamboo Face ducks down to avoid it.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Minerva is looking to land body kicks.
Bamboo Face looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Minerva connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.
Minerva throws a right and a left that both miss.
Minerva swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Bamboo Face takes a big uppercut there. He seems a bit wobbly but no, he's OK.
Minerva scores with a jab. Bamboo Face acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
Bamboo Face takes a jab right on the nose. That must have hurt but he shrugs his shoulders and looks to return the favor.
Minerva throws a hook but Bamboo Face blocks it.

Minerva instigates a clinch.

Minerva manages to break the clinch.

Minerva pushes Bamboo Face up against the cage in a clinch.
Bamboo Face digs a right hand underneath Minerva's ribcage. Minerva let out a lung full of air as it connected.
Minerva is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Bamboo Face can do to turn this around?
Minerva tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Scott Minerva dominated that second round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. This is the final round!

Minerva connects with a lovely right hand, straight down the pipe.
Bamboo Face scores with a hook.
Minerva throws a right hand that misses
and Bamboo Face cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Bamboo Face displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Minerva throws out the jab.
Minerva keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Bamboo Face lands a glancing blow to the side of Minerva's head.
Bamboo Face wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
Bamboo Face feints a straight left to the body, then turns around with a flashy move and hits Minervas jaw with a dramatic spinning back fist!
Bamboo Face avoids a punch combination nicely.
A jab from Minerva misses.
Minerva throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Bamboo Face blocks a jab.
Minerva misses with a left hand
letting Bamboo Face counter with a right hand.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Minerva throws a right hand that misses
enabling Bamboo Face to counter with a crisp jab.
Minerva throws a leg kick
and Bamboo Face counters with a nice uppercut.
Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts Minerva, as that shot connected.
Minerva missing with a left hand there. Bamboo Face was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
It seemed like Bamboo Face was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Minerva tries to clinch but Bamboo Face moves away
enabling Bamboo Face to counter with a crisp jab.
Minerva loads up on a big right hand but Bamboo Face slips the punch.
A right-left combo lands from Minerva.
Bamboo Face takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
Bamboo Face misses the jab.
Minerva uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Bamboo Face.
A telegraphed right hand from Minerva misses the target.
Bamboo Face misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Minerva.
Minerva pushing out the jab but it's not landing.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Minerva keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Bamboo Face.
Minerva looks like he's developed a pretty tasty lump over his left eye. He'll need to avoid taking much more damage to that.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Minerva misses with a leg kick
and Bamboo Face counters with a nice uppercut.
A big left from Minerva misses.
Bamboo Face takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Minerva misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Bamboo Face! But no joy.
Bamboo Face slips a straight right by Minerva.
Bamboo Face keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Minerva.
Minerva with poor footwork there. He got himself in a bit of a tangle, enabling Bamboo Face to score with a decent uppercut.
Minerva shoots and misses
enabling Bamboo Face to counter with a crisp jab.
Minerva throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Bamboo Face counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Minerva throws a shot from downtown. Bamboo Face moves away and avoids it.

Minerva closes the distance and clinches.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Bamboo Face creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Minerva is looking to break free of the clinch but Bamboo Face has double underhooks.
Minerva wants a takedown but no success here.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Minerva is trying to break the clinch but Bamboo Face is controlling him.
Bamboo Face lands a right hand.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Minerva.
Bamboo Face tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Bamboo Face misses with a hook to the ribs.
Bamboo Face lands with a left to the head.
Minerva tries to pull guard but can't drag his opponent to the mat. Bamboo Face just stands there and leans against the cage.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Scott Minerva. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Bamboo Face working aggressively here.

Minerva gets control of Bamboo Face's arms and successfully pulls guard. Minerva will no doubt be looking for submissions off his back.

Minerva looking for subs off his back but Bamboo Face has passed one foot through into half guard.
Minerva wants to get back to full guard.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Bamboo Face seems very keen to just sit and control from half guard but Minerva does not like that idea so much and is remaining active off his back.
Minerva might be looking to lock onto one of his opponent's long limbs for a submission, whilst we're on the ground.
Bamboo Face keeping composed on the top, looking to control the action.
My spies in Rabid Dog inform me that Bamboo Face has been getting involved in the gym's BJJ sparring sessions. Let's see whether that pays dividends!
Let's hope that Bamboo Face has the urge to step up the pace any second now because for the last 15 or 20 seconds he's just been holding on tight.
Ubungu Bamboo Face has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Bamboo Face is just content to waste time from the top position. Minerva takes advantage of the situation and regains full guard.

And that's the end of the fight!
Ubungu Bamboo Face comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
I think Minerva has won this one but let's see what the judges have to say. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Gwen Towbar scores the fight 29:28
Judge Tiny Johnson scores the fight 29:28
Judge Stewart Dunkirk scores the fight 29:28

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Scott Minerva!
A relieved looking Scott Minerva thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.